[ChromaKelly]

This is a baby born situation, he's already 3 weeks old, birthmother has already signed consents. She is bipolar and has a sister diagnosed with schizophrenia. I can't find any good info about whether or not schizophrenia is hereditary, bipolar there is a 10-15% chance. She took depakote during the first 3 months of pregnancy, we're OK with the risk that causes, it's negligible. Everything else about the baby is fine.
We need to decide ASAP. DH is really torn about the bipolar disorder, I am too, but little more willing to take the risk.

[hrisme]

Originally Posted by ChromaKelly

This is a baby born situation, he's already 3 weeks old, birthmother has already signed consents. She is bipolar and has a sister diagnosed with schizophrenia. I can't find any good info about whether or not schizophrenia is hereditary, bipolar there is a 10-15% chance. She took depakote during the first 3 months of pregnancy, we're OK with the risk that causes, it's negligible. Everything else about the baby is fine.
We need to decide ASAP. DH is really torn about the bipolar disorder, I am too, but little more willing to take the risk.

Schizophrenia is hereditary, there is approximately a 15% chance that a child with one parent with schizophrenia will develop a psychotic disorder. Both of my biological parents have schizophrenia, meaning my odds of developing a psychotic disorder are 40%. So far, so good--all I have now is major depression, generalized anxiety, OCD, and social phobia.
For more info, go to schizophrenia.com

Bipolar disorder is not at all uncommon in birth parents & is often undiagnosed. So you're taking the chance of that simply by adopting, unless you are adopting directly from someone you KNOW does not have bipolar disorder. The best way, in my opinion, to look at it is take the worst case scenario. Would you be willing to commit to this child if they were to develop a mood disorder or a psychotic disorder? If you are not willing to commit to these possibilities, you probably should re-consider the placement, recognizing that this is going to severely limit the number of potential situations you are presented. And, even if there is no reported mental illness, you still run that risk, just as you would with a child you gave birth to.

That being said, the risks in this situation probably don't significantly outweigh the risks in other situations. When it comes down to it, 15% really isn't that big of a percentage. Stability in the early childhood years also has been shown to reduce the odds of developing a mental illness. And if you are educated early about the possibilities & know what to watch out for, early treatment can help you develop the skills you need to cope with the mental illness.

Don't know if that helps. Good luck with whatever you choose.

[BrandyHagz]

Bipolar disorder is not at all uncommon in birth parents

Whoa...huh? Can you please link me to the study that states this fact?

That's a pretty generalizing statement that makes me really uncomfortable.

(for the record, I only know one bipolar bmom - and 3 bipolar amoms...not that I mean anything by that...but my net's pretty wide...)

[pwheatle]

The risks with depakote are not neglible. The exposure to valproic acid while in utero leaves the baby open to a syndrome called Fetal Valproate Syndrome. The impact of this syndrome can be mild or quite significant. For my son it leaves him with autism (generally accompanies this syndrome) and an IQ that islow fifties at best. Gratefully hyperactivity is not one of the characteristics that he possesses but it is a common one. This syndrome is not likely dicernible at birth. I say this only to prepare you. Drs are not that knowledgeable about the syndrome nor about the true risks of valproic acid (depakote) in pregnancy. My son is adorable, kind, tender and nurturing but make no mistake about it he is severely disabled by his syndrome.

[Leigh131313]

Meh......It wouldn't concern me. It's not like anyone has a perfect gene pool, ya know? I think so much with mental illness has to do with our life experiences, environment, support systems yada yada yada.

No baby comes with a guarantee Good luck on your decision!!

[mondk]

Tread lightly here people...I AM bipolar and get easily offended by people unwilling to raise a possible, but not probable, bipolar child. First off, I was undiagnosed until 2001 and I was born in 1972. I also have schizoaffective disorder diagnosed approx. 3 years ago. However, despite a few med changes, have been stable since 2003. I work, I parent, I play, I love, I'm quite creative and a good writer from what I've been told and had 2 very loving understanding parents that have given me their unequivocal support throughout all. I also have an exceptionally wonderful hubby who has seen me through the worst of my psychotic episodes. I have a bio son who is 11 with no symptoms except for maybe some mild ADD...which probably most of the world has anyway. I am very ADD but have never been diagnosed. Of course, our a-son's mother isn't bipolar but has had severe bouts of depression, mostly situational.

I'm of the mindset that if you want to adopt, nothing should stop you. If the child/adult is actually diagnosed, it may not be severe and may not even need meds...I have many bipolar friends and some schizophrenic friends as well that have great coping skills and don't need any meds. It burns my a$$ to even hear about someone not wanting a child whose mother is bipolar....even if the mother is not, the kid could still wind up with it. Neither one of my parents has the disorder and I still have it.

So, if you turn this baby down who desperately needs a parent or 2 just because of bipolar, then I would have nothing more to say to you or any of you that have this same mindset. I can't help that I have it but I sure can cope. The meds I take are minimal and I've been on them for years. You need to really think about all I've written here. If you have any other questions, ask away or PM me.

Blessings, Michelle

[carlychan]

The bipolar would not bother me at all. The schiczophrenia might a little. This is hereditary. I would not stop me from taking the baby in. Any of our children (bio or not) could grow up with some mental health issues. I say go for it

[belleinblue1978]

Originally Posted by mondk

Tread lightly here people...I AM bipolar and get easily offended by people unwilling to raise a possible, but not probable, bipolar child.

THANK YOU! This bothers me so much. My son's parents watch him like a hawk because I am diagnosed with bipolar II. Just because I have it doesn't mean he will. Quite frankly, I feel that their behaviour only hinders him. They refuse to educate temselves and talk down about me to their friends and family. I live with my bipolar without meds. I am able to behviourally control my moods with the VERY occasional cues from friends and family.

Bipolar is so misunderstood.

[TxMom65]

Both my kids mothers are diagnosed with bipolar disorder. One doesn't believe it (and probably truly is) and the I doubt the validity of the other dx.

The kids are both very intelligent and amazing.

[Fran27]

I wouldn't be worried about bipolar either, but the rest would scare me (especially the dekapote thing honestly).

The way I see it though, it's best not to think 'ph, it's only a 15% chance'. You need to ask yourself if you can deal with it if it is within the 15% chance.

[shaylynn]

To me it is nice to be able to even have that much medical information on a child. If you were to adopt another child, they might say that the child is perfect but then they might not even know much if any, of the family health/medical history. With my kids I adopted, they say that 5 of the males in the family have schizophrenia and depression also runs high on both sides but at least since I know of the history, I know what to watch for and both are able to be controlled by medicine and a person can live a rich and productive life IMO,

[SchmennaLeigh]

While BP disorder can be genetic, it can also happen to a child with no previous genetic history. If you wait for the perfectly healthy baby to come along, they could someday have BP disorder. Or cancer. or ... the list goes on.

[Cjmeck]

Both my own father and sister are bipolar; so it wouldn't affect my decision. My parents had 4 children and only 1ended up bipolar. This is something that can be controlled with medication; certainly not a life sentence. I did some research on this awhile ago, and I remember reading that bipolar disorder is over-diagnosed and the new "trendy" thing for psych docs to find. And they really aren't sure what causes bipolar disorder. Environment or genetics? It could be something that they are genetically predisposed to, but something in their environment (life experience, ect..) triggers it. Kwim? And with her bio sister being diagnosed with a mental health disorder as well; i have to wonder if there is not an environmental factor at play in their diagnosis. I'm not a doctor (and I don't pretend to play one! lol) but just keep that in mind.

[Lumpkin]

Originally Posted by mondk

So, if you turn this baby down who desperately needs a parent or 2 just because of bipolar, then I would have nothing more to say to you or any of you that have this same mindset.

sheesh!
1st, People turn down babies because of hair color, gender, parental education background, etc. Calm down and realize that everyone has their ideas of what they will accept. Bi-polar is just the one thing that was brought forward to this family, and they have to think about it. YEAH, I think it's silly to exclude a baby from your family for any reason - but people do it.

2nd, nobody said this baby desperately needs a parent or 2. I'm guessing there is a long list of people looking for a relatively healthy infant. They need to decide ASAP, probably because there is a long list of people waiting, if they are not interested. So if this family wants to pass this child along to someone more ready to accept it, big whoop!

[bromanchik]

Originally Posted by BrandyHagz

Whoa...huh? Can you please link me to the study that states this fact?

That's a pretty generalizing statement that makes me really uncomfortable.

(for the record, I only know one bipolar bmom - and 3 bipolar amoms...not that I mean anything by that...but my net's pretty wide...)

Right there with you Brandy. I would love to see the source of this statistic. I reminds me of those who say that many birthmoms have ADHD because getting pregnant shows they are impulsive.