[waiting4myfamily]

This story really saddens me...

Teen ‘pregnancy pact’ has 17 girls expecting - Kids and parenting - MSNBC.com

[loveajax]

I don't live too far from this town and it is really a gorgeous place (irrelevant, I know)....it is the "setting" for the book and movie A Perfect Storm. It definitely has been hit hard because of fishing regulations (it is traditionally a "fisherman's" town) and general economic stuff.

It's pretty shocking and sad. I actually "hate" the coverage because all I can imagine is how any kid born of the "pact" will feel some day.

I am an extremely liberal person...a proud card-carrying member of the ACLU, but, having worked with kids, and having seen "cycles" of teen pg and poverty, I honestly wish there were some kind of "vaccination" against pg (my ACLU membership will probably explode right now!) for kids.

[aclee]

I'm not to far either...We go to this town for some amazing Chowdah in the winter, and to walk the beaches in summer. I was going to comment on this as well, but I'm really at a loss as to what to say. There are so many aspects to the story that I'm upset about. These were girls who went out and desired to get pregnant. In the process they made 17 fathers as well. Granted those boys made a choice when they decided to have sex as well, but I still feel some resentment to those girls. For them all to get pregnant they had to be tracking their cycles and everything. I'm concerned about the children that will be born to these children. Clearly they will eventually know they are "pact" children. Sad on so many levels on the way it will impact so many young men and women and children over the long haul. I think the media attention is horrid...I think the attention was exactly what these girls wanted. If they didn't want people to know and give them attention, and all they all wanted was to be Mom's, why would they have released the information about the pact at all.

It's really sad. I used to assist in teaching a parenting class in that very town. I hope they all take it.

[thanksgivingmom]

Originally Posted by aclee

In the process they made 17 fathers as well. Granted those boys made a choice when they decided to have sex as well, but I still feel some resentment to those girls.

Not all of the fathers were boys. It was reported this morning in an interview that one of the 15 year old girls was impregnated by a 24 year old homeless man. Talk about the desperation they put upon themselves to get pregnant!? He is now facing charges of statutory rape.

Originally Posted by aclee

I'm concerned about the children that will be born to these children. Clearly they will eventually know they are "pact" children. Sad on so many levels on the way it will impact so many young men and women and children over the long haul.

My estimation will be that the media will do follow-ups on these young girls and the "Children of the Pact" for years to come....Ugh.

[loveajax]

Also, if I ever have a son, you can best bet that I will tell him that NO MATTER WHAT, he must use a condom. I don't give a "free pass" to any of these guys either (and particularly anyone over 18).

[HappyTwinsMom]

I've been following this story, too, and the thing that keeps sticking with me is that the school is making noises about offering free birth control without parental consent. Well, fine, but these girls didn't WANT to use birth control. They WANTED to get pregnant. So handing them contraceptives wouldn't have changed the outcome one tiny little bit.

Unfortunately, the media playing up stories about Jamie Lynn Spears and others make it seem "cool" to have a baby without thinking about the time and energy and just plain work it is to be a mom. Ms. Spears has tons of money and lots of help - she doesn't need to worry about where her next meal or package of diapers will come from. I'm not saying SHE shouldn't parent; I'm just saying all the coverage is making it seem downright glamorous without taking into consideration the road ahead for a girl without her resources.

[SchmennaLeigh]

Blogged about it yesterday.

Birth Parents Blog, First Parents Blog - Not So Smart

The thing that scares me most (besides the facts that a) what are these girls MISSING so much in their lives that they needed the "unconditional love of a child" (pfft, ahahahaha) and b) my heart breaks for these babies yet to be born) is that with parents bound to be angry about their child's stupidity (call it like it is here), these mothers are bound to face some "forced" decisions by their parents. (Not all but my guess is at least one.) While I don't agree with what they did, I also don't agree with forcing any mother to place her child for adoption.

This situation, adoption or parenting, is really lose-lose for almost all involved. We can only hope and pray that somehow these families are able to make the most out of a situation that started off very poorly.

[alinev]

What amazes me most is the apparent lack of parent, or educator knowledge. How were they left with so little adult supervison?????

[JustPeachy]

The thing that scares me most (besides the facts that a) what are these girls MISSING so much in their lives that they needed the "unconditional love of a child" (pfft, ahahahaha) and b) my heart breaks for these babies yet to be born) is that with parents bound to be angry about their child's stupidity (call it like it is here), these mothers are bound to face some "forced" decisions by their parents. (Not all but my guess is at least one.) While I don't agree with what they did, I also don't agree with forcing any mother to place her child for adoption.

I thought about this, too, that because these girls are underage, their parents can make decisions for them that they may not agree to. It is not a good situation to be in (underage and at the will of your parents), but that is a sad fact of what happens when you make poor choices when still a minor and don't think through the consequences. And mind you, these were not accidental pregnancies. These were purposely planned out with the intention of these girls supposedly all raising the babies all together. Didn't they even once speculate how they were going to support these children? Or that maybe that their parents wouldn't be agreeable to having them bringing a baby home?? Even just looking at the economy, how bleak things are in not only their hometown, but all across the U.S., what were they thinking???? I also have to wonder about the guys. Did they lie and tell them they were on BC when in fact they weren't? Granted, these guys shouldn't have just take the girls' word at face value, but now their little plan has ballooned into something with far more repurcussions.

[MamaS]

When my daughter was 16 and just out driving on her own, she and a group of friends met up at Walmart. There was a woman with a box of puppies out front and the girls decided they would each take a "free" puppy, bring it home and raise it. They would all be "closer" to each other because their puppies were siblings. [ The puppies were apparently beagle/german shepherd mixes, by the way.]
Out of six puppies, one family kept them, four families gave them away (or dumped them) and one turned it in to a no-kill humane society so a home could be found where it was wanted. [That was me, over my daughter's protests.]
I know babies aren't puppies, but these girls didn't give much more thought to the whole situation than my daughter and her friends did. And their parents will be left to make the unpopular decisions and/or "clean up the mess".

[loveajax]

I'm laughing (I know this situation isn't funny) thinking that I was always one to give into peer pressure...for me, that meant wearing the Madonna lace glove!! (I am dating myself here). I can actually sort of "see" myself doing something like this (I was a "follower" in high school) which is kind of scary and I'm glad none of my friends wanted to be pg together.

Why do I see these girls and their babies on Oprah and Phil (with the "apparent" message being...boo, bad...but the reality being that they will be "reality stars")? This is a really warped culture, I'm sorry.

[BrandyHagz]

The insanity of this situation is just so dadgum mind blowing for me. Not that there are teens that are pregnant, but that they had a pact to do it.

I recall, I was 13 or so, and there were a ton of pregnant girls at the local school in town. Pregnancy and parenthood at a young age was certainly glorified in my small town and for a few years, we had a lot of teen pregnancies – so much so, that the town I lived in that had never had a commercial day care center, finally got one. I remember seeing these girls out on Friday nights with their boyfriends in their pick up trucks with baby seats cruising town.

It was seriously ‘so cool’…

Then – the girls started getting pregnant, younger. An 8th grader got pregnant, she had her baby and missed a lot of school – she had to repeat the 8th grade and when she walked (graduated) five years later, her daughter, who was in Kindergarten in the same small one building school in our tiny small town was out in the crowd cheering on her mom.

There was a period, in this small town in Northwest Texas, when more girls in school were pregnant than not pregnant (we were small, 20ish in my graduating class).

Sad, it’s just so sad. Like Jenna, I wonder what was missing from their lives that made them feel like they needed to do this?

[aclee]

Pregnancy was not common in our town, I think of my graduating class of 169, 3 might have had children. I couldn't say if many more dropped out because they were pregnant though. There was one girl that was pregnant in 8th grade. It was so bizarre...she never said a word, she just got bigger and bigger and bigger. She did that 3 times, and never said a word. At graduation, she came with her three kids. Then there was one other girl who never told her parent till (the story her twin tells) one night at dinner she quietly told her parents she was in labor.

These girls were clearly missing a lot in their lives and turned to each other. There was video of one girl at the school, also expecting, but not part of the pact...there was also a story about the girls going with each other to get pregnancy tests...giving each other high fives if they were positive and being upset and sad if they weren't. The one that paid the homeless mad...wow. I am reading more comments that the majority of the guys were in their 20's. I don't care if the girls DID tell them they were on BC...Why were they sleeping with 15 year olds?

Such a sad thing. Does anyone know if DSS can help these young parents get counseling? Even if they think this is a great idea now, there will come a point where they are ashamed of their actions I think.

[Oceans]

Well.. given my blog today, this probably wont come as a surprise….I was pg at 16 and placed at 17. In my mind NO FRIGING WAY (!!!!!) would I recommend admittance to the give birth before you can VOTE club.

Personally, I want to take every single one of these girls and SHAKE them.

What the HE*L were they thinking??? Apparently – Only about themselves b/c they want someone to love…

If there is something missing then I blame the parents. Every one of us need to look at our girls and COMMIT to how we will prevent this going forward.... We can say how our hearts go out to all of them….

But that doesn’t raise 17 babies does it…

This makes me sick!

[aclee]

*sigh* loveajax, we're closest...clearly we need to go round these babies up. Oceans said we could.

seriously, you are exactly right. If there are follow up specials on the "pact" babies, I will vomit.