[Towzer]

Hello folks
We are new adoptive parents andwanted to see if someone can share any knowledge on this
We have had our child now only one month from foster care

Our question is that just lately his sleeping is very erratic

Up until last week he was on an afternoon nap for a couple of hours then typically in bed just before 8
He would sleep till 7am the next morning and would sometimes wake for a few secs in the night crying then he would fall back asleep

The past few nights we have the same routine
He is waking at about 10 crying his lungs out
My wife settles him for about an hour till he falls back asleep then 2 hrs later it starts again
We go into his room and he is standing up in his crib

Just wondering if he is having some nightmares ??

Teething - ? although teething I think would bother him through the day also yet he is fine
Hes always in a good mood

Any ideas ??

I thnk part of this now is that he is becoming attached to us ( good and bad thing I guess) but we used to be able to put him down for a nap without a whimper and my wife said today he was balling for half an hour till he fell asleep

We also noticed that he was not that close to the FF and notice that even with strangers he will go to them and be very very friendly - he is even improving in that area also

Suggestions ???

Thks

[Linny]

I"m a firm believer in laying down with an infant/child when trying to get them to take a nap. I think this helps incredibly with bonding, as well as give the child assurance of a parent being close by.
That said, IMO, your child is still going through a transitional stage....and I think this is normal behavior to some degree.
I'm wondering what time you nap during the day? If your child is napping later in the day....it makes it harder to be truly sleepy for nighttime, KWIM? In our home, unless there are rare circumstances.....we won't lay down for a nap after 3pm. Later than that, tends to be too close to the bedtime of 8-9pm.
An 18month old needs to be active and running around for part of the day.. Does your child get enough exercise during the day?
And....if this child was in the same foster home for several months.....this could still be an issue. Good fp's or not, the routine was with them....and your child may still be trying to figure out why things aren't as they were before.

Sounds as though he's beginning to bond, though...because he's not so willing to go to strangers. THIS is a really good thing (but I think you already know this). Just keep trying. Keep holding him whenever you can. Lay down with him during naps---and both of you can rest. Spend time with him and be patient.
Stick to routine as much as you can; show him you're there....I suspect things will improve in short time. You're definately on the right track.

Sincerely,

Linny

[Celesyee]

I agree with Linny. It sounds like he is going through a transitional stage. Quite often when a toddler is first brought into a new environment it's all fun and games to them, which can also be exhausting and helpful in the sleep area. He may be realizing that he is now in a permanent home...with that being said, I again, agree with Linny in regards to being consistent in his routine and that things will improve in time.

As for bonding...I'm a bit confused. Is he going reluctant around strangers or extra friendly with them?

[Cjmeck]

When my kids start doing that, it is usually a sign to me that they are over-tired and having a hard time settling themselves down into a deep sleep. Have you tried putting him to bed 30 minutes earlier than usual?
I'm sorry I don't have any experience with foster kids and the attachment/transition process. But just thought I'd throw out a possibility for a typical problem in that age range. Best wishes.

[jalapeno]

I agree with Linny too. My foster kids were all infants when we got them but I have friends who adopted two boys and got them at about that age. The younger one especially took several months to really seem to relax. He also got up at night for a while.

I read somewhere that getting a child outside first thing in the morning can sometimes help stabilize their internal clock. I don't know if that's true but we usually take our kids for a walk after breakfast and it seems like they're crankier if we miss it.

I think my 2 year old daughter occasionally gets nightmares. I guess I never thought that would happen so young.

It's so hard to tell with teething sometimes. But like you say if he's got no symptoms during the day . . . then maybe not.

Good luck and congrats on the addition to your family!

[startedover]

My 17 month does this when she is over tired. Also if she falls asleep and then we put her in her bed it is almost a guarantee she will wake up and scream for 30 minutes. I try and make sure we put her to bed awake even if it means a 3-5 minute crying jag.

Also keep in mind 15-18 months is a very big age for attachment. That is why our ped believes in gettting rid of vices like pacifers , by this time. good luck