[_LeighAnn_]

Jessica, my oldest DD, was adopted at birth. We knew the birthmother personally, and were aware of the fact that there was most likely drug use during the pregnancy, at least in the 1st trimester.

Jessica is now 4, and we're noticing signs of some problems that may lay ahead, such as ADD and possible behavioural problems. Strangely, not so much learning disabilities. She has impulse control problems, anger issues, and alot of trouble focusing, especially when she's being repremanded. It's like we just can't get through to her.

I was just wondering if anyone else had experienced similar issues and how you dealt with it. We are considering seeing a counselor.

[Stormster]

Hi. Ours is still a baby but before we adopted him (knowing there was some drug use) we knew that exactly what you are describing was a possibility.

I've read a ton and there is a chance the two are related so I really do suggest you get some help with this.

Did your DD recently start preschool?

Did things change suddenly?

I am so glad you started this thread actually.

[Ann07]

I wouldn't jump to conclusions and blame any of your DD's issues on possible drug use. At four years old some of these problems start to be noticed, it dosen't mean that it is related (although it could be possible). I would recommend setting up an appointment with a pediatric clinical psychologist. That way she can get the appropriate testing done and you can have a plan of action. The earlier the better for intervention.

Please remember this just may be her regardless of her prenatal history. Behavior problems and ADD are common in children these days. The psychologist will be able to tell you more. Good Luck.

[sbaglio]

I agree with Ann07. There could be many reasons for your DD's issues. Also, do you have any information about the birthfamily's psychiatric and/or behavioral history? That may be pertinent.

Good luck!

[_LeighAnn_]

I guess I should say that this isn't new. Most of these issues started as early as 2. She is starting prek in August, so I'm anxious to see how she reacts in an enviroment like that.

I agree that the drugs may have absolutely nothing to do with it. I do know that the birth family has alot mental issues. Not exactly sure what the deals are though. Her bgrandmother has depression and SEVERE anxiety issues. And the grandmother's brother is schitzophrenic. The grandmother also told me that the birthmother was always very distant in emotions. Even as a child she never showed emotion, like not wanting to hug her parents, things like that. When Jessica was born we were at the hospital and I was with the bmother the entire time. She never shed a tear. When she was discharged she left with a smile on her face like it was no big deal. I always thought it was just her way of dealing with it, but her mother says no, that's just how she is.

[jodybird511]

I would also add that, regardless of whether or not the attention and behavioral issues are a result of prenatal drug exposure, they are a problem now, so they are something that you need to deal with. My dd was also likely exposed and has attentional issues. Do I know for a fact that this is b/c of prenatal drug exposure? No, but I do know that it needs to be addressed and dealt with regardless of where it's coming from. KWIM?

[blessedbybug]

Originally Posted by _LeighAnn_

Jessica, my oldest DD, was adopted at birth. We knew the birthmother personally, and were aware of the fact that there was most likely drug use during the pregnancy, at least in the 1st trimester.

Jessica is now 4, and we're noticing signs of some problems that may lay ahead, such as ADD and possible behavioural problems. Strangely, not so much learning disabilities. She has impulse control problems, anger issues, and alot of trouble focusing, especially when she's being repremanded. It's like we just can't get through to her.

I was just wondering if anyone else had experienced similar issues and how you dealt with it. We are considering seeing a counselor.

Both my children had some prenatal exposure to substance. We are diligent to watch for possible signs but it is hard at this age (my kids are 2 and 4) to know what might be related to exposure and what is personality and developmental/age related. Both my kids are high-spirited, need lots of structure and time to transition. But I'm not convinced at this point that it is related to anything other than their age and personality. If you have concerns regardless of what might be the cause, you might contact your local health unit and/or early intervention program (most schools will have this information) to see if you can get some kind of evaluation.

[Cjmeck]

At 4yo my bio son behaved much the same way you described (unfortunately, we still have moments with him at 6yo). And that can be typical for the age regardless of drug use. Having said that, trust your instincts. A consult certainly won't hurt. And if it just typical 4yo stuff, maybe they can give you suggestions on how to deal it.

[maricela]

Your daughters behavior sounds alot like my DD who was also exposed to drugs. I don't want to always blame the drug but it's something that's always looming in the back of my head. She's 5 now & it's gotten better. Go with your gut! It definitly won't hurt to have her seen by someone!

Good Luck!!

[Saya]

LeighAnn you might want to take a look at the Special Needs board. There are a lot of people there who are parenting drug-exposed children, and I'm sure you'd get a lot of great info.

(Not that the people hear aren't helpful too! )

[mommy3]

LeighAnn, just wanting to support your concerns by sharing that the sooner you seek help, the better the effects of the interventions for your dd. My dh's mom (my MIL, of course), saw to it that my dh was exposed to NOTHING he shouldn't have been during her pregnancy, but my dh has ADHD and learning difficulties; he's also brilliant, but our joke is that he has just had to find a way to access his intelligence. With some meds and lots of new ways to study during his two degrees, he has been highly successful and actually got better grades at the university than in h.s., Dean's List often, etc. However, he wasn't diagnosed until 11th grade, so he missed out on the learning curve timeframe that your child would benefit from during 0-7 years of age. Even knowing that, my dh did so much better academically when he had support services and other skill development support at the university. Hope this is helpful, susan

[shy_bear]

Please feel free to pm me. My middle child was possibly drug exposed, but we are unsure. I KNEW something was off since she was little and when she started pre-k things really surfaced. Two years later she was diagnosed with ADHD, did a year of therapy, and then we medicated. She is doing GREAT now!!!