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  #1  
Old 05-05-2008, 08:01 PM
Kansasgirl Kansasgirl is offline
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Birthmothers day

So, are any of you planning to do anything special for your child's birthmother on birthmothers day? Presents, cards, etc...?
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  #2  
Old 05-06-2008, 03:54 AM
Stormster Stormster is offline
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Been thinking about that.

It's funny that you ask. I feel like mothers day is for me. And if you know me, it is a big deal for me to say that. I think I will do something for her on his birthday. I feel like she should be acknowledged by us on that day most of all. In the future when he has a relationship with her he may decide to do something for mothers day and that's his choice. Also her bday and xmas we do send her something.

I don't want to set any precedents I won't honor or be comfortable with and i want to just be a family on mothers day. I waited a long time for that!
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Old 05-06-2008, 03:56 AM
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Stormster, Birthmother's day is not on the same day as Mother's Day.

Kansas, we do not, by our boys' Bparents choice. What about you?
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Old 05-06-2008, 05:12 AM
Stormster Stormster is offline
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Oh sorry!

When is it?
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Old 05-06-2008, 05:53 AM
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Birthmother's day is the day before Mother's day...

I personally don't like the idea of it because it seems a little too Hallmark-y to me. (Just my personal feelings on it). However, I did look it up and if I recall correctly, it was started by a group of birthmoms in Seattle, so maybe I'm off base.

Now, if my boys' firstmoms liked the idea of birthmother's day, that would be one thing...but I send a card for Mother's day.
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Old 05-06-2008, 06:13 AM
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Oops, sorry Stormster, I didn't realize I left out when the day actually was! It's always the Saturday (day before) Mother's Day each year.

Is there a birth father's day?
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Old 05-06-2008, 06:41 AM
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There is no birthfather's day.

Birthmother's day was started as a way to reflect together as birthmother's. It was never meant to be a day to recieve cards etc.
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  #8  
Old 05-06-2008, 07:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by belleinblue1978
Birthmother's day was started as a way to reflect together as birthmother's. It was never meant to be a day to recieve cards etc.

Ok - now I understand.
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  #9  
Old 05-06-2008, 09:13 AM
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We send a simple card to our son's birthmom for mother's day. This card is about thanking her for making me a mother - because that's very special to me. It's not about celebrating her as a mother (that's for my son to do later if he wishes).

I agree that birthmother's day is not something that I would celebrate with her by sending cards/gifts. I think it's "hallmarky" too.
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  #10  
Old 05-06-2008, 03:23 PM
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No, we don't do anything for Birthmother's day. Our agency has a gathering every year, she has never wished to attend (that I know of anyway)
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  #11  
Old 05-06-2008, 04:52 PM
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We don't do mother's day or birthmother's day because our girls' birthday is so close to both (within a week), and we send photos and such at that time.
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Old 05-06-2008, 05:33 PM
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Well, our birthmom got me a card and a really nice inkpen for my Mother's Day...since we will be in Branson in a couple of weeks, I told her I would bring her something back...but not really for Mother's Day...just a gift from our trip.

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Old 05-06-2008, 07:09 PM
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This will be our 3rd Mother's Day since having Natalie. On our 1st Mother's Day (Nat was only 6 months old) we had a BBQ in the park. My Mom and MIL were in town visiting so they were there. BMom also came and brought along her parented son, her neice, and her own Mom. And of course all our kids were there. We had a very nice time and all the Moms received gifts It felt right to share the day that year, however, I wouldn't want to do that again for every Mother's Day. This year we will grill out at home and I hear my kids have something cool to give me We will see BMom on Monday for a day at the water park, but it wasn't planned with Mother's Day in mind...just a day that we were both available. I think I will give her some new pics of Natalie...just because. I don't think I would ever give her anything for BMom's Day...I doubt she even knows about it anyway.
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Old 05-07-2008, 06:24 AM
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I am going to mail her a funny card and DD's 3 month photo in a frame. I think she has something for me too. To date bmom has give us more gifts & cards than we have had time to get her so I want to do something nice. I told her about Birthmother's Day, she was unaware.
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Old 05-07-2008, 07:23 AM
finallyamom0310 finallyamom0310 is offline
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I am sending an ecard but really am not sure about much more than that myself. This is my second mothers day, my daughter is 14months old, and for the first one that is all we did as well. I don't want to se a prcedent for gifts as she has mentioned that sending stuff on my daughters bday and xmas were more of what she expected. If you can talk to the bmom about expectations on how they want to be reminded that you are thinking of them and treasure the gift they have given you it helps. We are going to visit with the bmom this summer so we will give her a gift at that time for thanks.
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