[shy_bear]

the more and more I think about A's bmom. I wonder if she is thinking about him; if she is wondering if he is ok. I SO want to be able to talk to her! Let her know how much we love him and what a joy he is! We are adopting him through fc. She left him at the hospital and in the paperwork we have the only contact she made with the county was to tell them not to give him to her family and he was safer with someone adopting him and he would have a better life. The cw has an aunt's phone number. We have been advised NOT to contact this aunt; the relatives are not safe. BUT I so want to get in touch with his bmom. My hubby does not get it; he tells me it is not about me and to leave it alone.
I am so emotional over all of this. I look at him and want to cry for what his bmom went through, what he has gone through, and how thankful I am that he is my baby.

[ourdreamcametru]

(((HUGS))) I understand and am so sorry you are feeling this way. Even though we have contact with bmom I so wish we could atleast send pictures and updates to bdad but he wants no contact. Just last night I was in the kitchen and dh and Castle were on the deck and he swooped her up in his arms and was "flying" her around and they were both laughing so hard. I couldn't help but think how I wished bmom and bdad could see moments like this to know how happy and healthy she is. I guess these feelings are normal but that doesn't make it any easier!

[kelceesmom]

Shy I am there with you. I get choked up at times at how happy and go lucky Kelcee is. I want so badly for her bparents to know that even tho they had to make the toughest decision of their lives we cherish this little person and she is happy and free to be who she is today.

[One_Happy_Momma]

I have to join in with you guys!

Denice- in my case bmoms didn't make the decision to relinquish, the decision was made by a judge, but I still feel grateful to them for having given birth, they must've done something very right to have had produced children as wonderful as mine, and if I love my children I must then love part of them regardless of the decision they made for their lives. Do I make sense?

Our dream- I know what you mean. I sometimes look at my girls in aw and wish I could share that very moment and feeling with bmoms.

Shy - I'm with you ! I especially wonder if bmon thinks about them on their birthdays. How can they not?? I too want to contact bmoms and let them know how they are doing.

[kelceesmom]

One I understand perfectly. We are all so blessed by our children and I think we just want to shout it from the mountain tops.

[One_Happy_Momma]

Originally Posted by kelceesmom

We are all so blessed by our children and I think we just want to shout it from the mountain tops.

YES! YES! YES!

[Adopted-B-4]

Shy bear-I understand your feelings of wanting to talk to her, I am sure at some point she may try to contact you but there must be a reason she didn't leave contacting info for her, don't you think? I do understand though. After the twins were placed with us, I cried a lot at the thought of their biomom and the emptiness she must have been feeling. I did get and do get the opportunity to talk to her though. But just know that there must have been a reason she didn't leave that information, maybe she is living in an unsafe situation, or with some of her family, I don't know. I am sure she knows how thankful you are and maybe one day she will be curious and register so he can find her. Good luck and congratulations!

[jjlutefisk]

I really wish we'd hear from my daughter's birthmom, too. She's 14 months old. I send pictures and letters to her every 3 months through the agency. I don't even know if she reads the letters. There are so many times I wish I could pick up the phone and call her to tell her about how much my daughter is growing. I find myself taking pictures and thinking, "Oh, I can't wait for M to see this one!"

My parents and friends tease me about going a little overboard with safety with dd but I keep thinking that her birthmom trusted me! I have to take the absolute best care of her.

I'm glad I'm not alone in all this.

[punchkin]

Shybear I too understand completely how you feel. As you know we just finalized our sons adoption thru FC on this past Thursday. I tried very hard to form a relationship with his bmom. I even became her mentor as reunify was the sole goal at the time. She had no desire to bond with her son other than to abuse him every chance she got. I reached out to her the day after our adoption to let her know how very sad I was for her, and that my greatest hope was for her to one day become a healthy, stable young woman, and to provide a stable and safe enviroment for herself. To get to a point, where one day in the future she can be a part of our sons life. Right now though, he's scared to death of her/family, so this is not an option.
My AD IS THE WORST. We got her when she was 10 days old straight out of the hospital. Long sad story. But they thought she would die,[ blessed baby] Anyway, I've never met or seen bmom. But for the last 41/2 years i've searched for her. Lit a candle for her on her birthday, prayed for her. It just worries me to death that she is out there somewhere [maybe dead] and she doesn't know that our dd is safe and happy and just how loved she really is. My DH doesn't understand either.
I wish you well.