[mommamarci]

I just got the call today that we are officially home study approved for adoption number 2!

I seem to have stumbled upon several people who are beginning their second adoption. Want to join me here? I think the process and the waiting will be different this time. I will have different emotions and feelings this time around. So, join me. Let's support one another!

[aallen25]

We're not there yet, but I just wanted to say good luck! In some aspects I look forward to us reaching that point but in other ways I'm very nervous! I hope you have a smooth journey to #2!

[redbonec]

HEEEYYY Marci! Congratulations! How great to have everything done and waiting! Wow, never know when now.

I am so glad you started this thread. We met with our new agency on Monday, and sent a letter back to them stating we want to continue with them. Now they are supposed to send us the big formal application packet. I feel really good about them.

Funny, you mention it being different this time around--I told the SW there during our interview on Monday how all we know about this next adoption is that it will be different from our first one.

Looking forward to talking with everyone about their second time around.

[momtosami]

HI, I am glad you started this post. We are in the early stages of a second adoption as well. We are expecting our home study any day now and then in the next few weeks we will start being shown to birth moms! We are excited but scared! We have a 5 year old daughter now who is adopted from Guatemala, she came home in 2004.
Looking forward to seeing how each others adoptions will go!

Susan
DH Mike
DD Sami adopted in 2004 from Guatemala
Started second adoption December 2007, waiting on home study to come soon and get started!

[OnTheJourney]

Great idea Marci for a support thread!

First off, Congratulations! Congratulations!

I'll bite! We have been officially waiting for #2 since mid November, I'll have to check the exact date. See how different it is already, I still remember the exact date, Febuary 27, we were officially waiting for #1. haha

I am very excited and of course am ready for #2 anytime, but there is a part of me that is quite OK with waiting a little longer. DS is just at such a busy, fun and adorable age...

You are right about there being alot of different emotions and issues surrounding a second adoption that will be nice to dicuss.

[wishing4real]

We are in the fiery center of our second adoption. The emotions are definately different the second time around. I didn't even clean before case worker came for the homestudy. I was much more laid back and kinda had a "don't realy care about the hoops we have to jump through" attitude. I think already having one means that you no longer face the fear of being childless forever. You know it will happen the way it should when it should. There just isn't as much stress, questions, etc. The anxiety is a little less for me, probably because I have an idea of what to expect. Anyway, I hope you don't mind me jumping in since we are matched, but it is our second adoption, and I thought I would congratulate you on being approved and offer support if I could. Good luck may all of your waits be short, painless and end with the child of your dreams! (although our wait was short, it certainly hasn't been painless. And while it is different the second time around, the emotions after a match, no matter how hard you try to protect yourself, are still as strong and difficult as with #1).

[mommamarci]

I am so glad I had some people join me.

I also want a baby tomorrow, but want to wait a while at the same time! I just hate the waiting and the unknown. But, I am loving Cameron at this age. And it is a lot of work right now... Plus I watch 2 kiddos. One is only four months. So, a part of me thinks it would be great if we waited about 6 months. But, then a part of me thinks I would go nuts! So, I am trying to let go and let it happen when it happens!

[tomandcate]

Congratulations! I am so excited for you.

Originally Posted by mommamarci

I also want a baby tomorrow, but want to wait a while at the same time!

So, a part of me thinks it would be great if we waited about 6 months.

I felt the exact same way - I counted on it taking a long time for #2, because #1 took only three weeks and I just knew lightening could not and would not strike twice...

And then #2 took only TWO weeks!

It was a year ago this week that we were called to ask if J's birthmom could review our profile, and the past year has been a whirlwind...it took quite a while (months) for us to wrap our heads around how quickly we became a family of four. You just truly never know!

Peace be with you during your wait!

Cate

[Vogi2002]

Oooooo I wish I could join this thread. We want to start #2, it's sadly the money part that is stopping us. I am going part time (once we sell our stupid house) and so I don't want to lose all our savings and everything. I can't afford 15,000 again just yet. But the more time goes by the more creative my financial mind becomes I would LOVE C to have a little brother or sister that is between 1 - 2 years younger than him...

[open heart]

We too are in the process for #2. We did not even know we were approved when I got a call about a potental already born situation this week. We passed on it for other reasons. But, what a shock to the system. I was more of the mind set that it is time to wait and we will have time to prepare. I guess I better get in gear since it could happen at any time. But it was a definite reminder that while I think the wait may be a little easier this time the actual process is a emotional rollercoster. Best of luck to everyone.

[Saya]

I'll join this thread! Though we're way behind where you are - we haven't even started our homestudy yet! But in our hearts we're full speed ahead - we just have to find time to get going with that darn agency application. (We're using the same agency as last time, but since that was international and this will be domestic, it's a whole new extensive application process.)

It definitely feels different. Last time our goal was just to have a baby as soon as possible - we just felt this overwhelming drive towards parenthood. Now - well Anabel keeps us on our toes so much we look at each other and say HOW on earth are we going to cope with another one? We feel a lot more patient and low key about it - though if you talk to me in 3 years and we still don't have a 2nd child, I'm sure that patience will be all used up.

I also feel like my approach to adoption is different this time around. Hmm - It's hard to explain, but I feel much more politicized around adoption. For eg I went to a recent meeting at my agency, and they said that of those PBMs who come to them for counseling and assistance, 70% decide to parent themselves. I think when I was adopting the first time those numbers might have scared me, but this time around, understanding adoption a bit more, I think those numbers are absolutely wonderful. It shows that the agency is really devoted to helping expectant mothers to parent if that's their decision, and that they are ethically just where they should be.

Have any of you thought about how to talk to your first kids about a 2nd adoption? I don't want to "surprise" Anabel with a sibling one day, but also I don't want to tell her she's about to have a baby brother and then have a match fall through. I'd be interested to hear people's thoughts.

[mkviola]

Congratulations Marci and everyone else! We are waiting until next year at this time to start #2, but I am already so excited!
I agree that the feelings are different even thinking about it, though. Just as exciting, but now that I am a mom, the way I think about EVERYTHING just seems so different... in a wonderful way! Does that even make sense? (I'm a little tired tonight. )

[chrisandaaron]

Originally Posted by mommamarci

I am so glad I had some people join me.

I also want a baby tomorrow, but want to wait a while at the same time! I just hate the waiting and the unknown. But, I am loving Cameron at this age. And it is a lot of work right now... Plus I watch 2 kiddos. One is only four months. So, a part of me thinks it would be great if we waited about 6 months. But, then a part of me thinks I would go nuts! So, I am trying to let go and let it happen when it happens!

Ohhhh.... I am so joining the club! This is exactly how I have been feeling and haven't been able to put it into words. On one hand I feel calmer than last time. On the other hand, I feel this weird nervousness since I mailed our profile books earlier this week. I also feel anxious everytime my phone rings.

And the wait begins.....

[Jenn4615]

Hi Marci!!
Congrats!!!
I would love to join this thread!! We are also waiting for number 2 aswell! It has definaltly been different this time... but time still isn't going fast enough for me!
Our DD was placed in our arms 3 months after our homestudy was approved... it was so fast now when I look back on it... we are just at our 3 month now... and our book hasn't even been shown yet... . So everyday for me brings a different emotion! But I know it will happen when it is meant too!
Can't wait to get to know everyone here!!
Jenn

[srusse24]

Marci, I am so happy for you!

Is your profile being shown yet? I have a feeling your family will be chosen very quickly!

Good luck on your journey!