[trh30]

We are potential adoptive parents and we have been listed with an agency since the end of June. We are interested in adopting a caucasian newborn. We have also recently listed with an adoption attorney and a facilitator. (because we are getting unbelievably impatient!!!) we have had a few opportunities presented to us and they have all involved signifiacant drug and alcohol exposure.

Our question is for those people who have adopted caucasian newborns--have you been able to adopt babies without signifcant drug or alcohol exposure? How long did it take to get a situation like this?

If you have adopted a child with exposure, what kind of exposure has that child had (in terms of what drugs and how much drugs/alcohol) and what have been the short and long-term effects of that exposure?

Any information would be greatly appreciated!

Tammy

[blessedbybug]

Originally Posted by trh30

If you have adopted a child with exposure, what kind of exposure has that child had (in terms of what drugs and how much drugs/alcohol) and what have been the short and long-term effects of that exposure?

Any information would be greatly appreciated!

Tammy

My children were both exposed prenatally to cocaine, alcohol and cigarettes for undetermined amounts of time. My son went through some initial withdrawal and illness related to the pregnancy/birth in the first months after birth but is more than thriving and caught up in all aspects of development at this point. My daughter seems to have had no effects short-term. They are both too young to know if there are any longterm effects yet, and most likely the full effect (if there is any) will not be known until early adolescence when they start having to make independent, logical choices. Both my kids are truly amazing people!!!!

One resource you might consider are these books which I found helpful in my research and preparation to adopt. Since the information you get on here is simply anecdotal, you might find a developmental pediatrician who deals with children who are prenatally exposed to substances for a thorough answer of the possible range of effects. Or contact your local health department or early intervention program for a consult.

Other things to consider besides what and how much is when... that can be a big part of how much a child is affected. Also, other factors to consider is the nutrition of the expecting mother during pregnancy and her metabolism. THose things can also affect what happens.

[aallen25]

We adopted a caucasion newborn last year. DD was exposed to alcohol until bmom found out she was pregnant. How much exactly I'm not sure but thus far there are no side effects. I do know, though, that she did celebrate her 21st birthday before finding out she was pregnant and she was a pretty big party girl. I believe she first found out she was pregnant when she was about 2 1/2 months along. Anyway, we did a private adoption and our wait was about 2 weeks from the time we first met with our attorney. We met DD's bmom through a coworker of mine. We were extremely blessed in our situation.

[Linny]

I understand why you're asking this question, but the answers to such are more like 'a shot in the dark'.

We've adopted many children. The children who suffered the most exposure, were older foster to adopt kids who's adoptions have all failed in some way. HOWEVER, I do not believe the reasons they failed were ever due to their drug/ alcohol exposure. It was more due to the neglect, abandonment and sexual abuse they suffered at the hands of their biologicals.

That said, we've also adopted a baby with drug exposure; and I'm quite acquainted with others who've adopted any race of child with significant drug exposures, KWIM?
Some had withdrawal, some showed very few problems. The 'shot in the dark' part, is that even with drugs/alcohol running through a baby inutero, it's somewhat of a toss-up to know how much damage has actually been done...until the days turn into months and even years.

Some babies can actually be tested early on to find if there is true FAS (fetal alcohol syndrome). (At least I've been told this.) Others, whether they suffer from withdrawal or not, may exhibit damages when learning begins, and/or when testing through early intervention services is conducted.

And then, there is the environmental element which--when done right--always helps emmensely with any problems a child may face. Don't ever underestimate the power of a good and loving environment when trying to overcome some significant delays and/or problems concerning a newborn.

One rule of thumb I think is good to remember: that MANY babies are exposed inutero to cigarettes, alcohol, OTC drugs, as well as illegal drugs. When a birthmother tells the agency 'how much' she's taken over the course of nine months, you can hope she's remembering all. Yet, just like with anything else in life, some will be honest, some will not.

And then, there's the idea that even if you have a situation where the baby's been given perfect treatment inutero, what about any genetic defects that no one might have seen coming?
So much of society likes to think that if their family tree LOOKS as though all relatives are perfectly formed....there are no issues.
But, genetics aren't static. Few, if any of us, know the extent of flaws within our genetic lines. And so it is with adoption.
The baby may look perfect, the prenatal care was perfect, but years later, the child begins to show signs of learning disabilities, or some other disorder no one would have considered---ever.

It happens because it's life. And life holds no guarantees no matter how cautious we live.
I'm sure you're looking to find a healthy situation, and believe me, I fully understand. But even in the ideal sounding adoption scenario, even with the perfect biological scenario, life has a way of happening.

My best to you......

Sincerely,

Linny

[Sleepydream]

totse.com | The myth of crack babies - collection of articles

Blair's Brain - Canvassing for Opinion: Fetal Alcohol, Crack Babies, Heroin Children and Cannabis Low Birth Weights.

National Advocates for Pregnant Women: THE DEMON SEED THAT WASN'T: Debunking the "crack baby" myth

Above is some reading to do that the "doom and gloom" people will not share with you. There is MUCH MUCH more if you look.