[yelhm]

Do any of you have a special name for your birthmom? For some reason I feel awkward having our DS call his birthmom by her name, but, of course, I'm the mommy, so that one isn't not available. But do others "name" their birthmom? Anything special? Or just call them by their first name?
Thanks!

[kakuehl]

Somewhere there's another thread about this... If I can find it, I'll give you the link. It's pretty individual though. How old is your child? Mine was a closed adoption and it was 33 years before we began to be acquainted. D, and his family just call me Kathy which is fine with me.

[dutchgirl2]

We asked our youngest daughter's first parents what they would like to be called and they both preferred to be called by their first names, so that was easy enough. You could ask them and see if they had any ideas themselves.

Simone

[DebCsMom]

Same with us, our children call them by their first names.

Deb

[teendoc]

I'm interested in others' thoughts about this as well. Our daughter is only 6 weeks so she isn't calling anybody anything right now, but I want to be prepared. I asked our firstmother and she said she didn't know what she wanted to be called.

[yelhm]

Ours is an open adoption and he's only 5 months old (so he's not saying her name yet, more me saying "we're going to visit... today."). So, I thought we should figure out what to call her. We have a very open relationship with his birth mom, I've asked, and she was okay with him calling her by name - but she couldn't think of anything else. So I thought I'd see if anyone else had a good idea, we'd test it out. If you can find the old thread that would be great - I looked around this morning but didn't see anything.

Thanks!!!

[HBV]

We also use her first name.

[SingleMiamiMom]

My neighbor who adopted her daughter 3 months ago says they will call her Auntie.
I think I would go with her first name.

[kakuehl]

Is there a special diminutive of her name that you could come up with... like DeeDee so that your child would have a special name for her. As I said previously, I have no problem with D calling me Kathy, but it would be nice if his kids had a "pet" name for me. (Just my warped thinking, I guess...)

[thanksgivingmom]

I'm with you Kathy (if you're warped I'm warped!)...in theory my DD's adoption will be open (we're working on it) and using my name feels very impersonal to me (although if this is what is decided between me and amom I will accept it). I obvioulsy know that I am not her "Mother" and would never expect that title, however i would like something that sets me apart in some way from just any other name...
however that is just my ideal situation.

I realize my input does not help at all! haha, sorry!

[mommmmy]

We all call her by her first name. Given that we have older children and they knew all about her contacting us and the process of the adoption and they knew her name...that's just how it went. It would probably be rather odd to have one of the children calling her one thing and the other children calling her something else.

Some on here have pet names.

[billysmommy]

My children call their first mom by her first name as well. Actually, they call her DeeDee, which is an appropriate nickname for her first name.
Personally, (note: just MY opinion), I do not believe in "auntie". My kids first mom is just that - their first mom. To refer to her as anything else would be misleading, and possibly confusing to the children.

[gracetoyou]

My daughter calls her birthmother by the nickname she has had since she was a child. This was her request. The name means a lot to her because only her close family uses it.

[kakuehl]

If you follow the various threads, various birth moms are uncomfortable with being called aunt. I frankly prefer Kathy to Auntie!

[mznia504]

We've already decided that our son will call his birthmom by her first name, but he will say Ms. D____.