[2Dads]

Hi,
Can anyone tell me why adoptions are so hard and very emotional? We have gone through 3 failed adoptions and I just don't see what we are doing wrong? We hired an attorney and a facilitator to help us and we have nothing but bad luck with every single adoption situation.
Can someone give me some feedback on ways to reduce dissappointment?
I am starting to think that maybe we are not ment to have a baby. But I know in my heart that is not true.

2Dads,

[Leigh131313]

We had two failed matches...it's very hard.

The reason its so hard and emotional, is because we are talking about becoming families. There is nothing more sacred....how can we not be emotional?

If this were a job interview that didn't pan out....we'd say, oh darn - I really wanted that job....but we'd move on to the next interview...


Families are not like that. They are deep and spiritual connections...


It's hard.


but it's worth it.

[dragonfly1234]

Leigh said it all, its a time for you to learn your own strength as a person. Adoption was not made for the faint of heart. It is time for you to learn how to be stong and committed to what you want! Don't give up. Have faith and be committed to all the challenges that adoption may toss to you.

I just gave my self a pep talk. Hope it helps you both too.

Michelle

[2Dads]

Thank you,
We are strong, just a downer when news like this can change our day. We will be strong and we will over come all obstacles.

[proudmommyof 2]

While it may not be easy to hear now, this is my thought: Adoption is so hard because God wants to make sure that we really, really, understand what a miracle it is to finally be a family, and wants us to never take our children for granted.

I am a better mom to my boys because of the struggles and heartaches (and a failed adoption at 8 months) that got me here.

Hand in there.

[denisenw5]

You are not doing anything wrong. I work for an agency and we remind all of our clients that no matter how positive a potential situation looks, no one can tell you if a potential birth mom is going to sign. All your agency, lawyer, facilitator, etc can tell you are the facts - she appears to be committed at this time, she states she wants to go forward, and so on. On the flip side, some situations appear to have red flags and the chances of them signing seem slim and then they go on to sign the surrender. Unfortunately no one has a crystal ball. We have clients who have adopted once, twice, three times with no failed matches and then we have some that go through several failed matches. I hope you are able to remain strong in your desire to become parents. It's not a matter of if it will happen, it's a matter of when. I am so sorry you have had to go through so much disappointment.

[cag4nyg]

Just hang in there just when you think there is no hope left and nothing else to look forward to a little one will be handed to you just when you least expect it.

[kelceesmom]

It is difficult and around the holidays it stings even more. We had a failed adoption after bringing home twin girls. One thing we took from that experience was that we were doing the right thing. It made us stronger and a little tougher too. Then we met our precious baby and here we are 1 1/2 years later with a beautiful girl. Your time will come.