[NurseNikki]

We were matched in July, and spoke with the young expectant woman for the first 5 weeks routinely, but haven't heard from her since. Anyone else had the pbmom "disappear" like this? Did your adoption go through? Our agency has removed the hold on our profile, since they have not heard from her - they basically think the match has failed. Any advice?

[maviskat]

Nikki,
Your situation is exactly what we went through this summer. We were matched in mid-May with a due date in late August. We talked at least once a week and she invited me to the sonogram in June. Mid-July she stopped answering or returning my calls and stopped contact with the agency. My agency sent her letters asking her to tell us what was going on but we heard nothing. We figured she had decided against the adoption but with no definite answer we were left hanging until we finally heard she had decided to parent two days before her delivery date. Needless to say it was a terrible summer! Heartbreaking doesn't even describe it. I wish she would have just let us know her decision so we could move on.
I hope your situation turns out differently then ours, but so many weeks of silence leaves lots of questions and uncertainty. I wish you luck.

Kathy

P.S. We were just matched again last week with a young couple who is due in 4-5 weeks. I was shocked to hear from my agency again so soon. I will say I have better vibes and am more optimistic with this match....cautiously optimistic.

[NurseNikki]

maviskat,

thanks for the reply. DH and I sent a postcard this week, very innocently saying "thought we would drop a line to let you know we have a new phone number, 800-xxxxxxx. Looking forward to hearing from you." We figure it will either remind her to call if she is still interested, or someone will call for her if she is not, telling us not to call/write again. Either way, we have a chance at some answer.

I am thinking that your experience is what we are in the middle of. I am hoping that she will call, but not expecting it. I would love to tell her we wish her the best of luck if she decides to parent, but we probably won't get that chance, either. Anyhow, thanks for responding!