[redbonec]

These are all good to read. I currently teach now (but not in summer), but will stay home if our current match goes through. I have never been full-time home, as this will be our first child. The truth is, I am little worried--we will be moving in a couple weeks. I have always found friends, or at least comraderie in teaching school. If this all works out as planned, we will move, bring home baby, and I stay home. I am worried that it will be difficult to make friends since I am not working and in a new place--but someone mentioned MOPS. There are a couple of those in the area.

My question is--how do you find time to be on the computer with how busy all of you (SAHM and WOHM) are? It seems that I can barely get on myself, and that's with no kids. I would love to know how you do it though, because I would love to keep up with others on the computer.

[hotspice58]

What is MOPS?

[sadiegirl]

Red,

I know the feeling; I taught in my "former life". There are neighbors all around us with kids but their youngest are in the 4-5 y.o range...not exactly prime playdate age! The ND neighbor has a DD my son's age but 2 older kids as well so that doesn't really work!

I'd suggest seeing what types of mommy and me classes are in your area. In the spring, DS and I took a Music Together class and a class at our local nature center. Now in the summer, we try and go to the park or to library storytimes. The Y might be a good spot too (and free babysitting).

MOPS is mothes of pre-schoolers but I think any mom/child can go...someone correct me if I'm wrong.

How do I get on the computer? During nap time (when I'm supposed to be cleaning the house!) or with DS nearby, or while he watches a video/TV.

Will be interesting b/c in the fall I will become a WAHM--I will be teaching online and am REQUIRED to be on the computer for 6 hrs/day!

[redbonec]

Thanks for the ideas about places to go and meet.


Hotspice--MOPS is as sadiegirl said. I went on their website--the ages of your children can be infant to 5 years old. You can put in your city and state and a list will come up of locations nearby and contacts.

[StorkWatcher]

Computer time? Easy enough for us working-outside-the-homes. I take quick breaks and come here.

I'm working outside the home full time and working on becoming SAHM. Well, if my hubby decides to get a different job, rather than be a SAHD, that is.

I'm up 5:30-6am most weekdays and get myself ready.

Babe wakes up between 6 and 7, and if I'm close to ready, I like to be the one to change/feed him first and cuddle a while. Hubby then uses that time to go out and feed livestock (horses right now).

I leave for work 7:30 am. Hubby either stays home all day w/ babe, or takes him to grandma's down the road 2 days a week.

If he's at grandma's, I usually pick him up at 5:30. Then we head home where I feed babe dinner, hubby feeds livestock, and then most of the time, hubby makes dinner while I play w/ babe and get him ready for babe.

I hate daylight savings time. We just started it this year, and it only means we work outdoors and hour later, but still get up at the same time..... ANd it's thrown babe's sleep schedule off. He now goes down between 8 and 9 most nights.

SAHD and WOHM usually eat between 8 and 9 pm. I HATE eating so late. But that's just the way it is now. Once babe's a little older, we'll eat together on his schedule, and the livestock will just have to work around it....

Then I shower at night and do housework until I'm stumbling around and trying to get in bed by 10 (I start getting really tired and "hitting the wall" at 8 though).

I do best on 8 hours of sleep at night. The months I stayed home w/ babe in the beginning were GREAT - because I just went to bed at the same time he did - very early.

[bajj]

Hi! I'm a SAHM here. I taught before we decided to have kids. I have an almost 5 year old and an almost 2 year old.

We get up around 6:30 and it doesn't matter what time they go to bed, they're always up early. We are pretty relaxed in the summer, we eat breakfast. They watch tv while I'm in the shower. We play, read, do laundry, dishes, etc. Have lunch and then a nap. Sometimes I get things done during nap time and sometimes I am exhausted and have to take a nap myself! LOL!

I admire you working out of home or even in home Moms. I couldn't do it, just as some of you say you couldn't stay home.

As for computer time, I take short breaks while the boys are entertaining themselves. I limit myself and even set a timer so I don't get carried away!

[akcskye]

Oh this is going to sound SOOOOO tacky...so forgive me, this is NOT the intention.

Why is it so important for people to have local friends?

I have great internet friends, but I cannot stand having local friends...never have...hubby and I have basically relied on us for all 11 years of marriage so far.

I don't like to have to deal with meeting and going places, entertaining, etc etc etc...

Perhaps it's just me...but I guess what I'm trying to say, Red, is that don't sweat it...friends will come if you want them...but sometimes, it's more harm to have them than not.

[Leigh131313]

ohhh I go to MOPS too!! I love it

[mom2justynsarah]

Originally Posted by akcskye

Oh this is going to sound SOOOOO tacky...so forgive me, this is NOT the intention.

Why is it so important for people to have local friends?

I have great internet friends, but I cannot stand having local friends...never have...hubby and I have basically relied on us for all 11 years of marriage so far.

I don't like to have to deal with meeting and going places, entertaining, etc etc etc...

Perhaps it's just me...but I guess what I'm trying to say, Red, is that don't sweat it...friends will come if you want them...but sometimes, it's more harm to have them than not.

Hey, whatever floats your boat! lol. I have a sneaking suspicion that once you have your child (ren) your scope may widen a bit.

[Delmom]

I've been both and am currently a SAHM. When I was working I would imagine how beautiful life would be if I could stay home and care for my family. Now in "Year 2" of staying at home I see how I really romanticized being a SAHM.

1. I would have time to do all the things I always wanted to do (learn a new language, play guitar, travel, sew, gardening, etc.)

I am not sure where my time goes, but I do know since I don't work I have little money. So, no classes at the community college. Had a yard sale and bought some flowers, so I am gardening right?

2. I would be able to take the kids to museums, trips, camps, etc.

See above (lack of $). I do my best but sometimes even gas money is tight.

3. I wouldn't have to do all my housework at 10 at night while exhausted after everyone else has gone to bed.

Trying to clean the house while kids and husband are awake is like shoveling snow in a snowstorm.

4. Weekends would be free because everything else would be taken care of during the week.

No explanation...just laughter! I REALLY believed that one!

5. My adopted son would be more secure and attached if I was with him full time.

Attachment is good, but as far as feeling secure...
True story from Target today: Turning down the juice aisle, oh, no, another cart and a man is pushing it. "MAN! MAN! MAN!" Then he decides since I laughed the man was OK. Proceed to the checkout..."MINE! NO! MINE!" Lots of tears. How dare that cashier scan our merchandise and put it in an evil bag!

Usually I love being home and I am sure there are benefits to it that I won't realize until I am back to work, but some days I actually calculate how many days left until my son starts kindergarten. (I know how evil it sounds that's why I tell you and not people I actually have to see!) LOL! Now I have a better fantasy...being a rich SAHM!

[Lovebug]

Delmom - LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!! All VERY VERY VERY true! Wish I was a rich SAHM, then maybe it'd be different!

--Renee

[intladoptionblog]

Originally Posted by redbonec

My question is--how do you find time to be on the computer with how busy all of you (SAHM and WOHM) are? It seems that I can barely get on myself, and that's with no kids. I would love to know how you do it though, because I would love to keep up with others on the computer.

Since, like others, my work is all on the computer, I have to find time. I get up before my kids and I work after they go to bed. In the middle, I put my 15-month old down for her nap in my office where I'm working, let my three year old watch DVDs, plus I'm really lucky to have an assistant who cleans, irons, answers the phone and watches the kids, so I close my office door for 2 to 3 hours every morning. I'm interrupted OFTEN, so my train of thought derails regularly.

I stop working about noon and spend the afternoon with the kids.

I really need to schedule in some time for a daily walk, but haven't figured out how to do that yet, and any variation, like doctor's appointments or major shopping trips, really messes with my day.

[court5505]

Yes, MOPS is Mothers of Preschoolers. I love it! In my group, the moms get together and have breakfast, a speaker, discussion group and a craft, while the kids go to the nursery. It's great because I get to meet other SAHMs and I think it's good for my DD to be with other kids and not with me 24/7. I think most cities have them.

As for having local friends, I would die without my friends! I love having people to go to lunch with or friends to go to the "chick flicks" that our DHs don't want to see! Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with my DH, but I need my friends too!

[Leigh131313]

Oh Delmom....I so could have written that post!!!

LOLOL LOLOL

[Chicken8182]

I am a part time working mom. I work 3 days a week 11pm-7am. My average day after work is get home by 7:20 get my husband off to work feed my daughter give her a bath straighen up (I don't clean on my work days I only straighten) watch some cartoons, take a nap for a couple of hours and then usually play outside and do yard work if its nice. I hate working midnights because I only get a couple hrs of sleep until after dinner but it allows me to be home during the day, I don't have to worry about babysitters and I only work just a few days. It is very hard though. somedays all I want to do is crash all day and I can't. I was a stay at home mom for six months once and it drove me crazy there's only so much you can clean and organize ect. I think I have a good balance now I get to get out and meet people and have adult conversation when i am working and the other four days i get to spend with my daughter.