[Bug-n-Bears-Mommy]

I have worked every day of my life since I was 18. Of course I have had vacation and sick time, but I have never NOT had a job. With the boys DH and I have spent the better part of the last year enjoying our relationship in the parking lot of my office when we pass the kids off as he is coming off chift and I am starting work.

Well, he just got a job that will afford me to stay home because it also has great benefits. That was one of the big reasons I stayed working too because my employer offered outstanding bennies. This is a whole new step for me, and I am scared!

I have never been at a job as long as I have this one, and my employer is fantastic. BUT, the hardest thing I do every morning is kiss my babies and go to work. I went thru so much to try to have a child, then the whole adoption process, I can't give up this opportunity.

For those of you who have made this decision, did you feel torn too? I mean I have never NOT provided for myself as far as bringing in a paycheck. Were you scared too?

[nycfsa]

Congratulations! I stopped working when we adopted our older son three years ago. It was a little hard to let go of the paycheck and the benefits which, it turns out, were way better than my husbands. I also worked for a great company so it was hard to give up work that I was proud of. It was definitely worth it, though, to be home with my kids every day. I love being able to take them places and watch them see and learn new things.

[Brittmomto3]

I can totally understand how you are feeling. It is a bit nervewracking making the decision to let go of 1 salary when you have been living with two of them. I always said I am going to go back ... We thought financially, I had too. Well, my daughter was in my arms 1 week and I thought to myself ..."I can't leave her!" I said to my husband ... do you think we can swing it on one salary? We thought about it. It was scary leaving a company who I was with for 12 years. In the end, it was a great decision. I love being there to create WONDERFUL memories with my girls. I love helping them discover the world around them. I think me staying home is a great beneficial to our daughters and my husband & I.


good luck!
__________________

[Lovebug]

Definitely a difficult decision to make. I stopped working when DS was 6 mos old. I had a fantastic job with a huge company. I loved my work. I was my work. But babies certainly do change everything!!! While it is difficult on one salary...we kinda squeek when we walk around here...lol...it is equally rewarding and satifying. There are days i wish I still worked...even on a P/T basis, but I wouldn't change things at all.

If you ever need to talk, I am here...PM me!

--Renee

[StorkWatcher]

WOW - congratulations. You're a dream come true for many of us. I hope your new "office job" is as fulfilling and wonderful as we think it will be (and I'm sure it will be just as hard as I imagine, but I still want to be in your shoes one day!)

Good luck to you and enjoy this precious, precious time. Bug and Bear are so lucky to be able to have you home all day and night long! REmember to talk to big people often.

Great - now you'll have more time for these boards, right???

[mumofone]

Welcome to the SAHM club. lol

I have worked since I was 18 too....even in University. After we adopted our first son, I cut back to 3 days per week.

We brought our second baby boy home last June, and I have never looked back. I was supposed to go back to work this past March, but didn't. I am so glad I can stay home.

DH works extra hours so that I may stay home. It works better this way for us, because there is always a parent home. Had I gone back to work, I would have paid out money for a sitter, etc., which when we did the math, just wasn't worth it.

[Linny]

I can understand your feelings as well. I've worked on and off...and at one time, had to be the one to work, just for the benefits. But....when dh got the job he has now---the pay isn't fantastic (good for around here, though).....but the benefits and retirement are fantastic.

Sooo, I stay home, watch the two (now) pre-schoolers and will be homeschooling the older one in the Fall. (Did the same at one point with the first two babies that are now grown).

I suspect that while this will be a change, you'll not regret it one bit. Kids grow so fast. Changes occur every day.....and if you're lucky enough to watch those moments, you'll cherish them forever and ever!

Best of luck. It's funny how we can certainly make money stretch---when we really want it to! ((HUGS))

Most Sincerely,

Linny

[intladoptionblog]

If there's any guilt involved in your fear, jettison that nasty stuff. You may not be heading for an office every day, but you'll be working harder (and at the most important job you've ever had) from now on.
It's quite a habit to break, though, so give yourself time to adjust to this whole new life.
Personally, I love not working outside my home.

[iwrite]

I just wanted to say good luck! My intention is to become a stay at home mom whenever I get my baby... It'll be the hardest job and the best job at the same time!

Em

[Leigh131313]

Actually, I did not feel torn at all...

I was more like...

WOOHOO!!!!

[joskids]

Yes, I've done it all b4. Stayed at home with my first
"set" of kiddos until divorce, worked full time and a second job, married again, adopted, worked 8 years and, finally, last year, became a SAHM. Yes, I WAS scared and still concern myself with it at times. Husband has secure (as can be) job and great bennies but we've definitely cut back. I can assure you that, at least for me, the worry is always replaced by the joy (most days) of being here with my 4 children, knowing that in today's world filled with mistrust at who may be caring for our children, I am doing the right thing for our family. I certainly hope you feel the same way once you get past the initial nervous feelings. I have admiration for women who work outside and inside the home. We must support each other.

Best wishes,
Josie

[Robbiesmomma]

I too started working full time at 18 and prior to that I babysat almost fulltime. I was FREAKED out at first but I have realized how much chaos we have left behind and I won't go back to it unless completely necessary. I started by switching to part time and then after 6 months I finally made the decision to quit. I have found our quality of life is so much better. We have home cooked meals most nights and it's nice be able to make my husbands life easier by getting most of the chores done so he can spend his home time with our son. Not to mention the fun activities and educational opportunities that are going on in our community for no or little cost. I also have used the Flylady website (free) to help me get the house in shape (Thanks to whoever posted her site, It's a God send). Do I miss the money? Sometimes, but now I have time to budget so it's not as bad as I thought it would be. Our kids only have one childhood and I want my son and future children to remember spending time with me and not a daycare.

Good luck.. but you won't need it, you will be fine.
Becki

[Bug-n-Bears-Mommy]

Well, I work for a very family oriented company, and it was not as bad actually giving notice as I thought. Whew!!

Now I get to start the countdown to my last day!! Watch out boys...here comes MOMMY!!!

Thanks for all your support, it is nice to know that I was not alone.