[Jensboys]

I was wondering if anyone with LDS knowledge or experience could fill me in on some of the common beliefs that would affect a child's view of family life/world view etc.

I have a friend this weekend at is meeting her three new children (coming via foster care). Kids are ages 4, 9, 14 or so. Kids have been in a mormon foster home for the last 13 months. They are a protestant Christian family.

There is one thing she has noticed so far (kids arrived last night and ffamily just dropped them off and left) - littlest one was QUITE upset that her son only wore pj bottoms to bed, and demanded that he wear a shirt. Said something about being "covered" at all times.

Is this a LDS thing, or their family thing - is there anything else like this that might come up? Food restrictions? Traditions? etc

Jen

[wannabeamommy]

It sounds more like a family thing. There is definitely NOT anything in LDS doctrine that says little boys must always wear a shirt. Heck (see know you know I'm a Mormon ) My brothers went shirtless all the time in the summers. Modesty is a big concern and is emphasized in our church but never anything like ALWAYS wearing a shirt for a little boy... it seems a bit strange that the former FM was QUITE upset about that.

The only other thing you might run into is that Mormons don't drink cofee, tea or alcohol and they dont use tobacco of any form. So there may be some questions and some issues there if the kids have been told that those things are a no no. So depending on how ingrained those things are you may need to explain that different families make different choices about those things and that neither way is "bad" or "wrong" just different choices for different families.

Other than that I cannot forsee too much of an issue. They are in your home and your beliefs, morals, and rules should be respected. If you have any other questions please feel free to ask.

~Rachel

[Jensboys]

Thanks for the quick reply - it wasn the foster mom that was upset, it was the foster SON that was when my friend's bio son was going to bed with only pj bottoms on.

The coffee / tea I had forgotten about and will pass that info on.

anything else?

[Jensboys]

How do mormons view other christian religions? Would it be discussed in the home? How do church services vary between a mormon service and a protestant service? Do you sing songs? Mainstream Christian sons? Is there a sermon? How is the service run? Trying to prepare for church tomorrow morn

Jen

[ajjhmf]

Originally Posted by Jensboys

There is one thing she has noticed so far (kids arrived last night and ffamily just dropped them off and left) - littlest one was QUITE upset that her son only wore pj bottoms to bed, and demanded that he wear a shirt. Said something about being "covered" at all times.

Jen, I'm not Mormom, but this sounds like a foster care thing. When J came, he had very strict rules in his foster home about being 'covered' and knocking and staying out of bedrooms. I think those can be fairly common rules in foster homes. It's been 2 1/2 years since J came home and only recently has he begun to feel comfortable with coming in our bedroom.

Depending on how long the kids have been on the home and how strictly the rules have been enforced, it may take them awhile to adjust. Your friend may want to ask the foster family for a list of the house rules so she can transition the kids easier to their house rules.

Blessings,
jenny

[Jensboys]

Jenny that is what I thought too but friend thought maybe it was a LDS thing, so I thought I would go to my source of info

Jen

[ajjhmf]

We're your source! Oh my!

[Jensboys]

Well to be honest, we are such a diverse group, there is bound to be someone here who knows about pretty much anything.

[ManyTimesBlessed]

I would agree that it may be a foster care thing. My husband and I were house parents in a group home for a while and there were a lot of rules like that. The kids always had to wear shirts, they had to wear socks all of the time (no bare feet), they couldn't go into someone else's room without our permission, etc. These were rules that were there when we got there and we were told to enforce them. If the foster parents have had a lot of kids, they may have rules set up that will work best with a group of kids who need a lot of structure.

[coopspa]

Mormon here . Mormon church service is seperated into three sections. There is a sermon type service where we also take sacrament. We sing hymns and take care of church business in this part also. Sunday school is generally next with kids seperated into age groups and adults meeting together. We study scripture and have discussions (I think we are doing New Testement right now. I'm not sure, dd has kept me from this part for awhile .) Last,the kids go to what is called Primary. They sing songs and, although not tradtional evangelical songs, they are songs about Jesus and God and a few about how to behave thrown in for good measure . They also have a short interactive lesson and then the kids give short talks or recite scriptures. Thats pretty much it. Haven't spent a lot of time at other churchs, so I don't know how that compares to the others.

As for how Mormons view other religions, well, if your worried that Mormons feel about others the way a lot of evangelical christians feel about us (google "mormon" and see the venom) you shouldn't worry. We obviously believe that we're the way to go as far as religions go, but we are taught to love and respect other people and their faith, just as we would want. Not to say there aren't wacko moromons out there, but hopefully they are the exception to the rule.

Good luck to your friend.

p.s. shirt thing is totally NOT mormon.

[coopspa]

I also forgot to mention that often people confuse the restrictions and rules of the menonites or amish (or others of that type)with the mormons. Mormons sing, have dances (with current pop and rock), we date, eat meat, wear pants and have parties. We do not have horns, more than one wife, or worship anyone other than God and Jesus. The kids should come out of that house behaving like TOTALLY normal kids.

[angjohnadopt]

I was raised Mormon (my mom was mormon) but as I became an adult chose to be Presbyterian. In fact, my mom is now Presbyterian too. Anyways, the only thing I think that ever affected me was that I have never acquired a taste for any caffinated drink. People think I'm nuts for not liking Tea - but I think being raised not drinking it - I just don't like it now. Also, although I no longer believe the Mormon doctrine - I respect them SOOO much. Mormon's have FABULOUS family values and are very supportive of one another. Most people don't seem to understand that they believe in the same bible & God as other Christians. If anything, those children were most likely blessed to be apart of a strong family full of love - so no worries.

[wannabeamommy]

I think coopsa pretty much covered it. The only thing I can add is that we believe the Book of Mormon to be scripture just like the Bible and we read and study it at home and in church too. So that would be a difference from other evangelical Christian churches. Basically we are quite similar too many other Christians in that the main focus is always Christ, that is why our church is called The Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter Day Saints . OH and we do not have paid clergy... members of the congregatrion lead and teach.

[Jensboys]

Hey guys please dont think that we were worried the kids were going to come out with a tail, and married ... it was just that if there were specific beliefs that might conflict or be different, my friend wanted the kids to be comfortable in her home during this visitation period.

Turns out anyways, that although the ffamily considers themselves mormon, they are non-practicing. SO ... kids havent been to church in a long time.

[Hey Nonny]

Another Mormon here....those were great answers. I think it is great that you asked the questions and that everyone answered so well. :-) It is always ok to ask that.

One thing that might also be different is that we don't tend to swear. Not everyone, of course, but that is another thing the kids might notice (at least, mine does!!!:-) No coffee or tea or smoking....that is about it.

Church is long, but most of it is interactive. I teach the three year olds in the Primary (childrens Sunday School). It is really fun for them. We sing songs, they give little talks and we have a lesson. Mostly they like it!

Feel free to pm if you have any other questions. What a thoughtful mom.......