[AMom2Two]

Upon marriage to my dh, I was handled the Family Bible from his sister. This bible has been handled down from family to family since 1883. It contains all the births, marriges and deaths of his family. The bible has always been handed down to the son in the family.

Lately, I have been wondering if I have a right to keep it, or should I pass it on to my sister-in-law who had 3 bio. children and can continue the genetic recordings.

I personally feel that the bible belongs to my son, even tho he was adopted. I feel it became his birth right when he was placed into our family. He will carry on the family name. With sister-inlaw children, they do not have the family name but certainly the family gene's.

Then part of me wonders if I'm right? Am I being stingly or selfish in feeling it belongs to my son? Should the bible go back into the family with the genetic history so that it can continue to be traced, or shall it now go to my son and a new era will begin?

Please share your thoughts with me.

[AdrienneG]

Why not give him the Bible to honor his place in the family that adopted him and give him the history of the family he is related to genetically (if you know it)?

You wouldnt want to take away one set of family history and leave him without a family history at all.... You can also ask him what he thinks and would prefer.

[bromanchik]

Originally Posted by AMom2Two

Lately, I have been wondering if I have a right to keep it, or should I pass it on to my sister-in-law who had 3 bio. children and can continue the genetic recordings.

Unless its purpose is to record medical history it certainly belongs to your son. He is definately a part of your family and deserves it.

[Nevada Jen]

I would say the bible definately goes to your son. There are two ways to look at it. Half the people in the book have no genetic connection to the others (the women). Also, think of 4 generations from now. Your sons genetics will be the family genetics. If you are concerned that furture generations will not be able to track genetic characteristics you could always put an (a) for adopted in parentheses after his name.

Jen

[Howdy]

If it were me, I'd give it to your son because it is a 'family' bible not a genetic bible. Plus, who knows whether the sons that have received it in the past generations were bio sons. The other day one of my daughter's friend's dad was telling me that a dna test of his oldest son had revealed the unexpected info that he wasn't the bio father, so you just never know!

[redribbonrose]

When you adopt, he is the same to you as if he were your natural child. The law recognizes him as such. The bible, by family tradition, goes to him.

[Opus]

AMom2, You're definately not being selfish here. The book belongs to your son, as he will carry on the family name.

[Jensboys]

K - two or three generations from now, your sisters kids will have no connection whatsoever to the family name in that Bible, and as such, it will hold no importance to them. To your son's grandchildren, how he came into your family will be irrelevant to their history as part of your family name. Its the right decision for it to go to your son

Jen

[MommyBear]

It belongs to your son. My family has a written genealogy, VERY detailed, dating back to the early 1800's - technically, there are blood ties involved, but it really has nothing to do with genetics. Its about family history. Nevada Jen had a great point - half of the people in there are men and women who married into the clan, yet they are still a part of the chain! Your son is now part of his father's family history - blood means squat - FAMILY means everything.

[MissyB9479]

I agree, this is a family bible and he is part of the family. However if you want to copy down this information in a nice geneology book and give it to your sister in law for her children I think it would be a wonderful gift.

[echaos]

Yup... Definetely goes to you son!!!

[Shoshana]

I ditto the other responders. It's a family history (not genetic or medical) and as such, it goes to your son.

[blessedbybug]

He is a part of the family. This Bible should be for your son. I always go back to what the judge said to us at Bug's finalization "She is your daughter, just as if she always was"... He talked alot about not only the privilege of being her parents, but also the responsibilitie to her. Our adopted children have all the rights in our family. It doesn't matter how the come to us.

[SydneyRN]

I say that the Bible belongs to your son also. But, have you considered copying the family tree part (either by Xerox or handwriting it) and presenting it to your sister-in-law's family? While the Bible is definitely a family heirloom that only one person can own at a time, the information in it could easily be shared.

I'm working as a community health nurse right now and I'm pushing the Surgeon General's medical family tree initiative with my clients so it's something that's definitely on my mind. You can never know too much about your family medical history and that information could definitely be shared with the rest of the family. Just a thought.

[coco46]

AMom,

I have to agree...that Bible is just as much your son's right as if he had been born to you.

Looking at it another way...how would you feel if anyone else in the family made a stink about it since your son was adopted? I'm willing to bet that you'd be spitting mad, and you'd have every right to be. Your son is part of your family. Carry on the tradition of giving this Bible to him with your head held high and your conscience clear!