[momraine]

HI, we are waiting to hear if we will be matched. A birth family has been trying to decide between us and another couple for a couple of weeks now. Her baby is due March 4, so time is short. I am trying to plan in case we are chosen. I have seen a lot of gift ideas for birth mothers, but in this case there is a birth father very much in the picture. They are living together and each have children. I don't know them well and since things are happening last minute we will meet them right before the birth (hopefully). I was told it was OK to give a small gift after the birth. I was trying to think what might be appropriate for both mother and father and possibly siblings.
Thanks
Lorraine

[LisaCA]

I gave dd's bmom a locket with a lock of dd's hair, but that would work with a bdad too. it doesn't have to be a locket, but something like a small silver box with the child's hair, or maybe a brag book of photos, something he can carry with him if he chooses.

[momraine]

Thank you, we have adopted before, but from Russia. (We also have two bio kids) This will be another special needs like my daughter. We had not planned originally on domestic, so the whole birth parent thing is new to us. They want semi-open with letters and pictures yearly. I had thought about a blank scrapbook, with the promise that we would send the pages to fill it, or an empty photo album or one with just a few pictures like of our house and our family, pets, etc. I guess I could do a page like that for a scrap book, something about waiting for our new addition and a page on each of us in the front and then the rest of the pages would be mostly about the baby, and I could send them one at a time or a few at a time. Depending on how much I could get done with four kids at home, LOL. I was also thinking maybe a plant brought to the hospital, that would go home with them, instead of flowers. It always made me sad when the flowers died. Anyway, any other suggestions?
One thing that may be an issue is that they are placing in part at least because this little boy will be disabled, I am wondering how that will affect the future relationship. With my daughter she was placed for similar reasons, but it was a different culture and much more severe financial issues. This one will be harder to explain I am afraid. I do of course plan to tell him about his birth parents and how much they loved him and try to have the best possible relationship with them, but eventually this issue may be a problem. So I want to start off on a very positive foot with them.

[Mommy24]

My Bsons parents brought me a large ceramic vase filled with lots of flowers to the hospital when he was born, I have cherished it for 15 yrs now. After the real flowers died I replaced them with a beautiful artificial arrangement, everytime I look at it, it reminds me of them.