[gerberbabies]

I hope no one minds me coming on here, but I am a PBmother, and had a couple of questions. The Amom I've chosen is having problems with her work not giving her maternity leave. And I'm truly upset with them about it. Do they have that right? Also, if anyone can give me some advice/opinions on what they did after their little one came home and how you got time off of work it would be appreciated. You can email me or write back here. Thank you so much.

[spitzlvr]

I can't help you with what people do about staying home with baby without maternity leave, but I can tell you that in most jobs, maternity leave is not given for adoption.

The logic is that maternity leave is for the mother to heal from giving birth, and has nothing to do with the baby per se.

There is FMLA, which (if I remember right) will provide up to 12 weeks of leave, paid or unpaid, depending on the employer.

I hope that helps.

[SchmennaLeigh]

FMLA is dependent upon 50 FULL-TIME employees, not including management. If the company doesn't fall under that umbrella, they are not eligible for FMLA maternity leave.

Do you have more information on her company?

[gerberbabies]

Yeah, I was looking up the FMLA, and it does mention giving the mother time off, rather for the birth or adoption of a child. I still am just shocked employers who give maternity leave paid, will not do the same for adoptive parents. I am in awe there's not a law against this. Thank you for your response

[sissyminsky]

I know that as an adoptive mom she would be eligible to have her job kept for her for a certain number of weeks under the family medical leave act (I don't know how many for sure.)

However, nothing states that that has to be paid leave. I know that my work will let me use my sick days and pay me for those, but the rest of my leave will be unpaid.

Hope that helps some.

[gerberbabies]

She works for a rather large company, so I know they would fall under the FMLA. I just never realized adoptive parents are not allowed the same rights as others. If maternity leave at her work is paid, I believe she should have the same rights. She will still have newborn at home to take care, just like any other mother! They did say she could use sick/vacation time, but as a new mother, when she goes back to work, who's to say she won't need that time then instead?....

[BrandyHagz]

Most employers who pay for maternity leave don't actually pay...its considered Short Term Disability, and you have to have a medical condition (such as giving birth) to receive that.

[emilyangel]

Like someone else pointed out, maternity leave really isn't about having a newborn at home, it's to help women recover from childbirth. I don't really think it's about adoptive moms having 'less rights' than biomoms, but really about a 'medical necessity'...

She most likely would be able to get unpaid leave under FMLA, however, some companies you do need to be with the company X amount of years. She needs to discuss this with her employer, and find out what options are available to her.

[SchmennaLeigh]

Maternity leave, the usual 6 weeks, is the healing time from laboring/c-section. Yes, it's also about bonding, which you could argue that adoptive mothers need, if not the same amount, even more. However, companies get off the hook by using the "it's not medically necessary for this person to be off of work."

And FMLA requires you to be there one year.

Edit: The above was fact and not my opinion, of course. I think ALL parents, regardles off age of placement, etc, should be given fair and just treatment. It bothers the bejeebus out of me. TO NO END!

[LisaCA]

we did not get maternity leave since it's listed as a disability. it's a wink and a nod, though, since most moms do not need 6-8 weeks to "recover" from birth. what moms need to recover from is the lack of sleep for those 6-8 weeks. Our college has subsequently changed the rules since i blasted them (or so they say, i have yet to see it in print). Part of the problem is that with adoption, your dates are unknown. we literally received calls that said "baby in Las Vegas, can you pick her up?"-most employers hate that lack of notice.

[SchmennaLeigh]

True, Lisa, they do hate lack of notice. But again, even pregnant mothers can suffer from the whole lack of notice deal. Our main anchor had to call off one day for what she thought would be just a routine appointment for some extra pain and was off for two months because of preterm labor and further medical complication. GUH!

Tamara, have the mother go straight to the president of the company, with the FMLA in hand, and ask why she is not being treated fairly. I assume, seeing as how they are looking to adopt, that they have a lawyer on hand, which would scare the company in general.

[gerberbabies]

Thanks to all It bothers the bejesus out of me too! I will let her know all that was posted here, and hopefully we can figure something out. I've had 3 children, and only worked when pg with my last daughter and had the lovely 6 weeks unpaid. But I know from experience, most definitely, it does not take 6 weeks for a mom to "heal, etc"... I totally think that time is for bonding..... Guess that's my vent for the day Thanks again for helping me out!!!

[sugarbabysmommy]

If she is California, a law was past last July for six weeks paid family leave, not full pay but up to a certain number (and something's better than nothing). I don't know the specifics but here is the web site, paidfamilyleave.org

[wanttobeparents]

My DH was given 2 weeks paid "paternity leave" by the company he was with when we adopted our first child. I was given nothing and planned to resign completely anyway. My boss talked me into taking FMLA instead. It turned out to be the best move. By taking FMLA, I was able to keep my benefits, including health insurance, with the company's contribution. Worked out great since my husband's human resources department was unable to figure out how to add Matthew to our insurance. Took my company 10 minutes. He changed jobs before my FMLA was up, so we had no trouble adding him to our new insurance. I quit at the end of FMLA.

Peggy

[Overwhelmed!]

Originally Posted by wanttobeparents

My DH was given 2 weeks paid "paternity leave" by the company he was with when we adopted our first child. I was given nothing and planned to resign completely anyway. My boss talked me into taking FMLA instead. It turned out to be the best move. By taking FMLA, I was able to keep my benefits, including health insurance, with the company's contribution. Worked out great since my husband's human resources department was unable to figure out how to add Matthew to our insurance. Took my company 10 minutes. He changed jobs before my FMLA was up, so we had no trouble adding him to our new insurance. I quit at the end of FMLA.

Peggy

Peggy- I'm glad that situation worked out for you, but I'm not sure that all companies are as accomodating as yours. My DH's company told him that if he took FMLA and then quit, he'd be expected to pay back the insurance premium money that the company had paid for him while he was on FMLA. Not sure if that's legal or not, but it concerned us enough that we didn't risk it. DH quit his job without taking FMLA and Jacob went on my insurance.