[wishingforbaby]

I feel like I've lost my best friend. I am the one who started EAT well over a year ago. I wanted to get closer to women who were in my shoes waiting to adopt. The women on EAT where there for me during the long wait. These women cheered and celebrated with me when I got matched to a bithmother. They laughed and cried with me during the agonizing wait. They celebrated with me when we brought Ryan home. They listen to my ups and downs, they sit through pictures and endless stories of my sweet baby. They give me advice. They make me laugh. They are my friends. THEY ARE MY FAMILY! This forum has been my family. I am incredibily saddened by this loss.
And I will follow my family as we ALL take leave of these forums. I feel bad for all the adoptive parents I won't get to meet and welcome into our EAT family. We always welcomed anyone who wanted to talk. It's very sad.

Brenda

[crick]

Brenda,

You can still do all those things. Your friendships made through the original thread are still there. That doesn't have to change. No one is saying "don't have a support group" by closing a thread. It might feel like that, but it's not the intent.

The door is still open and I think an EAT 2 was started to continue the friendships and support. Just think of it as a different meeting place...

Crick

[katieb31323]

unfortunately that is not true Crick. Many have left because of the way things were handled.

Kathy

[wishingforbaby]

Eat2 has also been closed. And a few of my friends have been banned. It will never be the same here.

Brenda

[crick]

Sorry, I was wrong as I didn't check that thread before posting here and should have before I spoke. My mistake.

Guess all I'm trying to say is hopefully as a group and forum as a whole can get past this in order to keep moving on with supporting each other. I don't feel your friendships have to stop at all, and hopefully you can get back to the original intent of things, which was to celebrate adoption and families and all those things you talked about in your original post.

Crick

[kiwi]

Brenda,

It is very sad when something familiar and well-worn is replaced. There can be new places, new threads. Sometimes though, something is just to damaged to be patched back together and it is necessary to start fresh. I bet if you started a thread on the same positive note, it would continue just the same as the first. There are seasonal "disturbances" and always have been no matter who is moderating. The saying "you can't please everyone all the time" is just a saying and something abstract that touches other people that aren't happy until it effects someone (or something) you care about then its the world falling apart around you.

To all who stop by and read: please try and be reasonable in your expectations of the volunteer moderators. Not every post is being read at every hour of the day and some issues are handled much later than they happened and others immediately. Some forums are read frequently by moderators because there are more issues there or maybe that particular moderator happens to be touched by adoption in the same way as the title of the forum suggests and is more interested in that forum than others overall. Do not presume to know the whole story. Behind the scenes there are many warnings given to individuals, many hurtful threads and posts removed before anyone saw them, but none of it is done with a hidden "agenda". Please be more considerate of the feelings of the people who keep this place safe, even if it hits close to home. Dwelling on the negative breeds negative.

Be more considerate of the feelings of the people that volunteer to keep these boards safe

[tb1braswell]

Kiwi. out of 400+ pages, how many 'damaging' posts did we have on EAT? There are only 2 that I can think of. One was from someone that posted a poem she wrote about her failed adoption and blatently used b*m* and then again last night Judy was upset and vented about something she observed. I just don't get it.

I also don't understand why we can't voice our feelings over EAT being shut down. We are upset. When, where and how are we to support one another over this? Obviously, we don't agree with EAT and other threads being shut down so does this mean that if we want to post on this forum we have to just ignore our feelings? Move on like nothing has happened? I think that's impossible until things are resolved.
Theresa

[BrandyHagz]

Judy's post was made after a warning was given in November about the SAME topic. A warning is a warning...

You are welcome to voice any concern you have, in a kind and respectful manner...So far, I haven't seen that happen...

[tb1braswell]

I think my last post was respectful and kind. You don't agree?
theresa

[Lovebug]

I agree, Theresa...if my opinion counts! Lol.

--Renee

[kiwi]

tb, the thread is not gone and in the beginning there was some discussion on the admin/ mod end of opening it up. Hot buttons need to cool sometimes and given all of the other issues in other threads (yes, I am predicting the future here ) it probably would have spilled over to EAT and then what? It would have been REALLY bad with NO chance of being opened again.

Please, everyone just take some deep breaths (I'm serious! Breathe with me!)

**breathe in**
Think of your triumphs shared with friends you only know in print
**breathe out**

**breathe in**
think of the last thing you did outside that made you smile
**breathe out**

**breathe in**
Think of what you will accomplish tomorrow, the next person you will hug
**breathe out**

**breathe in**
Think of nothing but peace for a whole day
**Breathe out**

**breathe in**
come back tomorrow and make that day possible

[BrandyHagz]

The one I responded to? Yes...it was...

The 27 threads I've deleted today....nope...the scathing PM's I've recieved? Nope...Its fine to be upset...this thread is a good start...the OP was very respectful...that hasn't been the case today tho...

[tb1braswell]

Kiwi, so are YOU saying that we may get EAT back after all has cooled down?

[wishingforbaby]

What's an OP.....am I the OP???? I have never been anything but respectful. In over 77,000 posts on EAT we had 2 mistakes. 2 only 2.

[BrandyHagz]

OP = Original Poster

2 Mistakes is one mistake to many...sadly.

Again, the thread is gone...locked...you're welcome to start fresh...but the Original thread is closed.