[hpoefull2003]

I was out at a function today and saw someone who new my childrens birth parents, she said "aren't those so and so's children". I said excuse me, and she repeated what she said. I will tell you later what I said but how would you have handled the situation and what would you have said. Remembering we have somewhat of a semi-open adoption, I have left it in there birthmothers hands.

[michellemartin]

I'm a bmom, but... I'd have said they were my children, and not specifically answered the question. Not knowing your circumstances, I'm not sure of the privacy the birthfamily would prefer though.

[rysmom]

I would have looked her straight in the eyes and said..."No, these are MY children." Then I would have stood there and watch her fumble for words.
Kathi

[tobeafamily]

I probably would've said, why yes, "A" and "R" are our kid's birth parents. Why do you ask? or something like that.

Regina

[L-A-J-C-R-C]

I would say the same as Regina and acknowledge that they are the children's birth parents.

Okay how did you answer?

Michelle

[Luv]

im dying to know how you answered as well....




Luv

[Kara J]

I think I would have said, "Well, they are MY o rOUR children, but so and so are their birthparents, why do you ask?" ... Please let us know your response.... :-)

[wanttobeparents]

I would have answered the same as Regina. "Yes, "L" and "K" are my child's birthparents. Why do you ask?"

Peggy

[hpoefull2003]

Well ladies your right about how I answered it I said yes L and V are there birthmom and birthdad but we are there parents. I did get another great response though and I think I will use it next time, "Yes, they are adopted. However, you need to be careful what you say in front of small children. What information we tell them and how we tell them is our private business. We would prefer they not hear potentially incorrect details from strangers. They are our children, and that's how you need to treat them." I really wish I had thought of it when it happened but I am going to try to remember it if it ever happens again.

After I wrote the first post I realized she had said to me "well I know you and your dh adopted them and that so and so where there parents." I should have told her if you knew the aswer why did you ask the question. I am sorry but it really bothered me. I feel that my children being adopted is there business and know one else's, if they choose to share it in the future that is there business, and I will really go off if it happens when they get a little older. Right now they are only 21 months but I know they understand alot and we do talk about there adoption to them.

So I guess I did good, and held my tounge, normally I would have tried to tactfully educate her on the subject but I was just to tired and shocked to deal with it.