[stillwaiting]

I was just wondering how many of you out there have had a contested adoption?

Which birth parent contested?

Was it contested after you were given custody, during the waiting period?

And what was the out come?

It seems to me that several families have been down this road.

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Yes - bfather - Yes, during the waiting period - still in the trial process.

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Thanks in advance to all those who respond.

[overflowing]

Our adoptions weren't contested but my best friend's was...bfather contested, during the waiting period, 18months later the judge terminated the bfather's right and granted our friends full custody of J. The judge mentioned the case took so long because he wanted to make sure no one could come back and appeal the case...he was confident all along that he'd grant our friends custody.

I pray that this will pass soon and that the judge will have great discernment. God bless.

[stillwaiting]

Thank you so much for responding. I am so glad everything worked out for your best friend. Thankfully, the judge seemed to be useing wise judgement in her case.

Thank you for your prayers and YES, please pray for our judge. He holds the life of our baby in his hands.

[Sleepydream]

Contested by bfather after six months, one week before waiting period ended and finalization was scheduled. Drug through the courts for nearly a year after this.

Finally, on trial day when my son was 16 months old he relented and signed the termination papers. Our adoption was finalized within an hour.

A week later we had a party to celebrate, it was a long time coming and all of our friends and family came out to show their relief and joy.

Below is a pic of my son @ his finalization party with his cousin.

[stillwaiting]

Sleepydream,

Thank you for your reply. I am so glad to hear your story and to hear a happy ending. Your son is a doll (if I can call a boy a doll)

I know the waiting is almost unbearable. We have been doing this for over four months and it will not be over until mid next year. That is just how it works; I guess.

I would love to know if legally it made a difference, in your case, to have had your son in your home and establish a bond with him for such a long time. I guess what I am trying to say..is did that have any weight when you went to court?

Love the picture. He sure is a cutie.

TD

[seeking2adopt]

The judge mentioned the case took so long because he wanted to make sure no one could come back and appeal the case...

Interesting! The judge on my sister's case said basically the same thing. The adoption of their two boys (fost/adopt) took two years because the biological grandparents were contesting.

I would love to know if legally it made a difference, in your case, to have had your son in your home and establish a bond with him for such a long time. I guess what I am trying to say..is did that have any weight when you went to court?

They were also told that the longer the boys were in their home, the better for their case. So I guess the answer is, yes, in their case that did have weight when they went to court.

I hope you will have good news and resolution soon!

[stillwaiting]

Thanks Stephanie!! You input really gives me hope! Have a great day.

Tina

[L-A-J-C-R-C]

Are the parent's rights already terminated? If so, how can they contest the adoption? I had no idea this could happen.

Michelle

[Opus]

In most cases, it isn't the adoption that birthparents contest but the TPR.

In our daughter's case, her birthfather contested his TPR twice. Both times he was rejected by the court. We are now waiting for a court date in December for finalization. DD came home with us right from the hospital, she is now 2-1/2. Its been a long, often heartbreaking journey, soon to have a happy ending. Just in time for the holidays.

Good luck to you.

[stillwaiting]

Michelle,

Our bfather did not consent to the adoption because his consent was not needed. He is a putative father. The bmom and he were never married. He is 17 years old and he is accusing the bmom of concealing the birth. It is all hog wash because he knew she was pg and he/his mother decided to get involved in our adoption after we had already been granted custody. We can not stop him from contesting because in Arkansas our adoption will not become final until 6 months after the interlocutory (sp) decree has been signed. ANYONE can contest our adoption. In our case we have not done anything incorrect and he had not done any thing right. He did not sign the putative father registry to allow himself to be put on notice in case bmom deiced to place. He is probably not going to win his case but we cannot stop him from contesting.

Tina

[Sleepydream]

Yes, bdad contested the TPR not the actual adoption. It is true in our case that the longer he was in our home, the better. The maternal bfamily was also very involved and did anything and everything asked of them to help us which was invaluable. His consent was not gotten at birth because he was nowhere to be found. Plus, by MO law technically not required for a variety of reasons. However, when you don't get consent, you have to get a judge to say that the grounds exist which make his consent not required. Clear as mud now? Anyway, in our case it was at this point he surfaced and contested the TPR. We did get his consent in the end, but I believe things would have worked out for us either way in our particular situation.

Thanks, I agree.....he is a doll! Of course, I am not the least bit biased!

Anna

[MNelson]

Our son's adoption was never contested, but his bio-dad was given six months after being notified to consider parenting (he was notified when our son was six weeks old). Tina, I know each state's laws are unique, but is there no period of time that a putative father has to step forward after the baby's birth to claim parental rights? Or is it the case that if he is not registered, he has no rights at all? Just curious. This is not at all how it is in Colorado. There is 60 days provided to advertise in papers (if the bd is "unknown"), and then if there is a claim that he actually was known but just was not notified, then the time is extended at the judges discretion (which was how we ended up with six months).

I am so sorry for your pain in this situation. I know how stressful it is to live with the uncertainty.

[stillwaiting]

Plareb,

He did not register prior to our petition to adopt, which is the state statute in our state, to receive notice. Actually, he did not even register before our interlocutory decree was issued and that was a month (30 days) after the petition to adopt. Because, we had to check before the Judge could hear our case. He finally registered 60 days after the birth. We feel he legally is too late to stay/stop our adoption because he did not register timely but we can't do anything to stop him from contesting. UGGH!!!

Tina

[BrandyHagz]

Most putative father registries require the father to register within a certain time, most say 30 days of the birth.

Some have shorter time periods, I think one is three days, but I don’t recall.

Almost all of the state statues for the Putative Father Registry say that ignorance of the pregnancy is not a valid excuse for not registering.

You can read more about each state here: http://putative-father.fbhosting.com/

[stillwaiting]

Brandy,

You are totally correct. I work in law enforcement and I have to tell folks, "Ignorance to the law is no excuse" all the time.

It will be a long shot for this bfather to stop our adoption. The bmom and her mother will be testifying on our behalf, if it will be necessary.

Please just keep us in your thoughts.

Thanks to all who have posted. I still would like to know if others have had contested adoptions.

Tina