[hs3614]

I was wondering who, if any, of you has ever NOT been told that they were adopted or didn't TELL their adopted child the "truth" of their adoption. I know in my family history, my great aunt was raised as a sibling when she was actually a cousin - and wasn't told about it until adulthood. I have my thoughts on this subject, but am very curious about your views. Please reply. Thanks!

[singl_adoptee]

HI hs3614,

I was never told that I was "adopted" by my father...

Last year, my mother told me that my father wasn't my "real" father after they got divorced. Apparently, while my father was fighting in Vietnam, my mother had an affair with a high school boyfriend. I was the result of that affair.

My father knew that I wasn't his blood, but he decided to stay with my mother and raise me as his own. His name is on my birth certificate and he never told my that he wasn't my real father.

Alot of things make more sense now that I know that I'm not biological related to my father. The troubled marriage of my parents, the way my extended family treated me, the fact that I never had much in common with my dad.... everything added up when my mother told me. I was a little surprised, but not really upset about it.

However, I'm now 32 years old and I don't really have a desire to look up my bio dad... the man who raised me is my father. I'm glad that my dad never told me that I was a "bastard child" and I wish mom just had never said anything... Sometimes life is too short to care about the "truth".