[mom2alex]

Ok, I don't even know if this is possible and if so how do I go about it? And am I ridiculous for even feeling this way in the first place?

This may sound quite strange, but the idea of getting Alex's ammendended birth certificate has me really upset. I know most adoptive parents can't wait to have that piece of paper with "their" names on it. Well, although I know it is necessary for many reasons, I am sad to think about it at the same time. To me it is like erasing what was and will alway be (her biology). My husband and I did not birth this baby and to have our names on it makes me feel like I am participating in a falasy and also not being true to Alex and her birthparents.

So my question is...would an original birth certificate exist someplace that has Alex's birthparents listed? My desire would be to not ony have the ammended version (for legal reasons) but to also have the original as well (for personal reasons). The tricky part is that we only have a semi-open adoption and aren't supposed to know their last names (though I "happened" to find bmoms full name on a piece of paperwork). So I realize that the certificate would not be released to us for privacy reasons. So here might be the ridiculous part. It is VERY important to me that the original exist somewhere, not necassarily in our possession. Maybe the agency could hold it...I just want it to exist somehwhere, becasue it is the truth.

Any ideas?

[echaos]

Hey Sue, It's not ridiculous at all. I think it's a great feeling, and one you should be sure to share with Alex when he is older. I'm sure he will appreciate it.

I suspect the laws around this differ from place to place. As an adoptee and adoptive mom in Canada, mine and Liam's original birth certificates with our original names and the names of our birth parents are sealed records that we are NEVER allowed to have access to. In both of our cases I know our original names and the names of the birth parents (for me, because I have found my birth mother, for Liam we are in an open adoption).

So you should rest assured that one does exist "somewhere" since I don't believe they can destroy them.

Interesting topic though.

[lisa in venice]

In CA the original BC is part of the paperwork sumitted to the court before finalization. I wonder if the agency kept a copy. BCs are public documents and you might be able to order the original. If you know the original name and have the birth family info you can do it on the phone or on line. I just ordered my baby's. Now we have the advantage of her adoption not being final and the birth was in a different state so hers will always be available (because the amended one will be issued by our state). I am pretty sure that someone has it, agency, court, attorney etc. You could always ask the birth mom if it was ok to get a copy for a keepsake.

lisa
ps just wanted to say that even if the records are sealed, in a big bureaucracy like state government one office may not talk to the other and the original MAY still be available if you apply for it using the original name.

[nawlinsmom]

man2alex
Just wanted you to know that I have a semi-open adoption and I was given a copy of the original birth certificate when my son's paperwork was sent to court from the adoption agency. The social worker I was working with sent it to me as soon as she received a copy from the state. I have the certificate in my son's baby journal along side his birthmom's picture. I do regret however that the birthfather in my case's name is not on the document, however I have his name in other court documents. Good luck with your search. IMO perhaps you could ask the birthparents if they would be comfortable with you having a copy of this document for you and your child and they maybe more than willing to get you a copy.

[Dianna]

Hi, I was able to get all my kids' original birth certificates. I believe they are public documents that are not sealed until the adoptions are finalized. What I did was to call the county recorder of the county they were born in and request a copy of the birth certificate. It costs about $10. One county was automated. The information they need is birth name, date and place of birth. That is all it takes. I paid with a credit card. I do believe that they become unavailable after the adoption is finalized so don't wait. I was glad to get the amended birth certificates as they are handy for other uses when you don't want the worlsd to know the kids are adopted, like sports and such. Best withse..

[allabouthorses]

I belong to a few groups that are very strongly anti-adoption. This is one of the things that really bothers them about adoption: that the birth parents are virtually "erased" by the amended birth certificate. I have no idea if it's possible or not, but I think it's wonderful that you want your son's original birth certificate. You obviously have your priorities straight!

[mom2alex]

Thanks for all the suggestions. I did send an e-mail to the director of our agency so I will see what she says and proceed from there.

Unfortunately since the adoption was finalized in November, it doesn't sound like I can just call up and order one at this point. If I don't get anywhere on my own, I may try to enlist the help of her birthmom (but since we've never even heard from her, I don't hold out much hope).

Thought I'd share a pick from our Finalization Day.

[mom2alex]

And perhaps I should change my usename to Mom2Alexandra. Poor girl gets called a"boy" constantly (lol)!!!

That is ok. I had her at a wedding a few months back in a flowered dress with a headband and three different people asked about HIM.

[Colorbind love]

I think you can obtain an original copy prior to the finalization. However, after that the original is sealed. It would take a court order to unseal it and let anyone have access to it (including the birthmother at that point). That doesn't mean tney destroy them. Quite the contrary, they are not destroyed. They still exist and are out there. It would just take a judge to give anyone permission to access it.

Prior to finalization, I don't know how hard or easy it would be to obtain a copy. I would think if you had the original information, it would be possible to obtain it. But, I don't know if some states might flag the birth certificate when relinquishment occurs and hold it. I know MIL placed a baby for adoption in IL in 1978 and attempted to get a copy of his birth certificate. It was prior to finalization but after she had relinquished her rights and she wasn't permitted to get it. But, that was in 1978. I also know that I considered getting an original copy of my bdaughter's prior to her finalization. But, she was placed in a family situation and I didn't actually sign relinquishment of her until her parents filed for adoption. So, for 6 months, she was legally mine with no caveats in the legal system. I can't obtain a copy of her original now though. Again it was sealed when she was adopted.

Honestly, I do understand the practice of re-issuing birth certificates. Its rather invasive to have to provide half a dozen documents to 'prove' the child is yours. I'm not fond of having to produce birth certificate, death certificates, adoption decree, green card, etc, etc if I have to establish legal relationship to my son right now. I will be relieved and grateful when his finalization occurs and I need only present a birth certificate. But, I also hold a copy of his original birth certificate, and fully intend to save it somewhere for the rest of his life (its from Africa another copy may be impossible to obtain).

[3girls1boy]

My daughter's bmom has hers in an album she keeps. I saw it for the first time two years ago (my daughter is nearly13). I was shocked because she told me that she was going to give her one birth name (I have several cousins with that name and didn't want to use it) but she gave her another instead, without mentioning it. Its a beautiful name and I think I might have used it. It bummed me out to see it 11 years too late. I am going to encourage my daughter to take it when she is confirmed when she is 17. I think her bmom requested it and was given a copy like anyone else. Maybe no one in the state office realized about the adoption.

[MNelson]

mom2alex, thanks for raising this topic! I hadn't thought about the idea that it may be hard to get the original document later, and now I'll make sure we do before the finalization (we are planning an open adoption, so we'll talk to the p-bmom about it right away).

[mj77]

I too never thought about this topic. We had have our son's origional birth certificate. It doesn't look the same as ours except it has the same number on it. His origional has more information. But on the new one next to "Mother", I am indeed his mother and am very proud to finally see this title officialy written out and certified. I completely understand thinking though.

[foreverbaby]

Yes, that is a sad situation! For everyone involved. I don`t understand why the records have to be sealed away forever. I mean, when they turn 18, they should have the right to have the original birth certificate. They told us, that the original birth certificate would be sealed away, for always. State of Ill. I don`t agree w/ it, but.....what can I say?

[StevieM]

What a precious family! And how wonderful that you want to preserve the past for your little Alex.

Wishing you many years of happiness with her!

Stevie

[sugarbabysmommy]

In CA, before an adoption is final three parties can order an original BC: the parents listed on the original document, the lawyer, and the agency. Like others have said, once the adoption is final the original BC is pulled from the county of record and sent to the state for filing, only a court order can open it again. Hoping that the paperwork would be slow moving, we actually attempted to get a copy of our child's original for one of our child's brithparents (they forgot to order one on their own) after finalization, but the original was quickly pulled from the county and sent to the state files. Needless to say, it didn't work. Our backup plan was to make a nice color copy of the orginal that the agency had ordered and given to us, or a copy of the copy that the agency had on file. Maybe you could do this, if the agency has a zeroxed copy on file they could copy it for you. If they won't release it to you (due to the semi open nature of your adoption), maybe your child's birth mother could request it on your behalf.

Have you asked your child' birth mother if she has a copy of the original? She might have gotten one for herself before finalization. Good luck with this...