[dixiemom]

I am wondering is anyone else is facing this dilema.....We are parents to a 3 & 1/2 year old son who is a miracle. I am wanting us to adopt a child but my husband seems to be walking the line on the subject. He agrees that initially we both thought we'd have 2 or 3 children, but now that we have out son, he wonders if another child might in his words "take away from him" (our son).....I, on the other hand thingk it would only enrich all of our lives.....if any of you have dealt with this can you offer any ways to start a constructive dialogue about the subject???? Maybe I am making my case in the wrong way.....Just wanted to get some opinions...........Lynn

[MyHeartsDesire]

My husband too was "on the fence". He said he would be happy with or without another child. I kind of made the decision for us both. I didn't want my little girl to be an only child (not that that's bad, but I wanted her to have a sibling relationship like the ones that I have with my siblings). I know that my husband REALLY wants a little boy so he has been supportive of adopting. I hope this doesn't sound terrible, but I think if we had had a boy first he might not want to go through the entire process of adoption. Anyway, what I did was gather information, talk a little about it off and on and see if he would jump on the bandwagon...and he did.


Lisa

[Sledge]

We had a 9 and 5 yr old when we decided to adopt, my wifes distant relative was getting her child taken away by social services so we decided that we would adopt him (he had just turned 7). It was a very good choice, we did not want a newborn (wife did but I didn't).

[angelical]

My husband and I have a 20-month bio son. I had the pregnancy from H-E-double-hockeysticks.... from 4 months of severe morning sickness to preeclampsia/HELLP at 28 weeks. My son was delivered, weighing 2lbs 5oz, in order to save both our lives.

So, we aren't trying another pregnancy! We had always discussed the possibility of adoption, so we realized last summer that this really made sense for us.

My husband is now working a night position (I work in the day), so we don't have to have our son in daycare. This means that he's done the lion's share of care for our son. And he definitely doesn't want another baby! (He says, I was to be able to TALK to the kid! ) So we are looking for a child between 2 & 12.

I'm sure that if I had never brought up having/getting another child, dh would have never mentioned it. And if I told him today that I'd decided I didn't want to continue looking for a child, he'd be perfectly fine with it. But he has been very supportive and helpful too over the past 8 months or so, of training and searching.

Good luck!
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