[cj416]

OKay, is it ok to change a babies name,under 2, if someone in your close family has the same name. We are trying to adopt a baby girl who has the same name as my sister and as one of my close friends. We were thinking of maybe changing one letter. It would still sound somewhat the same, just different. From Lisa to Lia,pronounced like Lea.Sounds the same just no "s".I figured maybe since she is a baby and odes not talk or anything it would not sound to different.
What do you think?
Please no hateful statements, saying I am taking her identity away. People who do international adoptions change toddlers names all the time to American names.
I am just asking if it is to much of change. We have not changed it yet. We just thought if it sounded the same it may not be to hard.Trying to cut a little confussion out ,if we can.We can leave it the same, but it would be a tad easier wth the change.

[reneetaylor]

I think it is a great idea. I changed my daughter's name from Maya to Mariah when I adopted her (at 12 months old), and she had no problem whatsoever adjusting. As long as it sounds similar enough to avoid confusion on her part, I think you should do it.

I can see where it would get confusing to call her name at a family get gathering and have both your sister and her respond. Also, Lia is a beautiful name. I'm sure she would understand one day when you explain the situation to her. My daughter is now 6 yrs old and she loves her name and thinks anything else sounds silly.....except for Princess!

Renee

[DianeS]

Personally I would think keeping the child's name the same as your sister would be a good way to publically claim the child as a member of your family. It would also be something you could point out in later years - that she has a "family" name. That could help when she's exposed to those people who just don't understand that your love for her is real family love.

Being "little Lisa" or "my Lisa" or using her first and middle names together (Lisa Ann, Lisa Marie, ...) could be the way to distinguish between them.

Your sister could well feel honored.

(This is all assuming you have a decent relationship with your sister!)

Personally, in our older child adoption search I'm secretly dreaming of a daughter named Susan. My best friend from grade school is a Susan. My college roommate was a Susan. My MIL is a Susan. The confusion will exist, since I'm still friends with them all. But I think it would be terriffic!

[mckenna]

i changed my son's name at 18 months to something totally differnt (even though the ending of both names are similar) and he did just fine.

[MomofKaden]

as long as no one else would be offended (ie the person who gave her the name) then I say go for it - no harm done! I guarantee you will care more than a little girl under 2 (especially considering how similar it will be)!

[cj416]

I just had to comment on this statement:
"Being "little Lisa" or "my Lisa" or using her first and middle names together (Lisa Ann, Lisa Marie, ...) could be the way to distinguish between them."
I want my child to have her own identity. Not to be another version of someone. I fully believe in honoring people by naming children after them, both my boys are. I gave them a middle name that was the same as some one else. I think each person should be unique in a family. I think it is demeanin to say little Lisa and big Lisa. I put A LOT of thought into my childrens names before I named them. I made sure it was a strong name that could not be made fun of and that they could be proud to have. I never said hey let's name him Fred, because that's my uncle's name.That's not the way I am. Your name says so much about you, who always wants to be thought of as the "other Lisa". I want my children to feel like they are their own person, not a smaller virsion of someone else.
I won't have to publically claim my child by her name, she will be my child whatever her name may be. She will have a family name, our last name and possibly my middle name.
The people in my life will know we are a real family, a name won't change that. As for other people, she's not going to walk around with a sign on that says " I'm adopted". They don't know our family,so a name does not justify anything. Not to mention screw them if they think adopted children are not a "real family".
Sorry, I had to vent on that one.

[lantanatx]

Change her name but keep some relationship to the original.

I was named by my bmother after her sister (first AND Middle name). When my bmother found out she was dying, she asked this sister to adopt me. I was legally adopted and they changed my last name to my adoptive aunt and uncle's last name - now there are two women 35 years different in age, but with the exact same name.

I went though life as little Alice or Alice Louise or some silly diminutive and still have to query confused callers who ask for Alice H**** as to whether they want "Big Alice or Little Alice". The only good thing is that my mother has better credit than I do and her credit report gets regularly dumped into mine!

[BabsCanada]

We chose a name for our daughter when we adopted her at 7 mos. It was a name I had wanted for a daughter since I was young. Her birthmother when we met seemed a little disappointed that we wanted to give the baby a new name and asked if we would at least keep one of her names, so we kept a middle name the birthmom had chosen, adding another middle name to honour both my husband's mom, and the birthmom - they have the same name.

Our daughter is now 7. She understandably only knows the name we gave her. She knows why she has the middle names that she does.

For your child, under 2 years of age, I think you are doing the right thing. Different yet similar. I have seen posted here before, that she is YOUR child and you should get to name her. But I think the birthmom should have some input as well; so for me, you are addressing both your wishes and hers.

Good luck to you all

Babs

[Support2Adopt]

I see no harm in changing her name, but if you're going to change it, change it to a name you really like. Is there a name you've always dreamed about calling your little girl? I would take whatever name that is and initially call her Lisa (fill in the blank) so she gets used to the name first. Then, after some time, drop the name Lisa and just go with the name you've picked.
JJ

[Linny]

I'm with JJ on this one. We have changed the names of all of our children....older and younger. Even when we kept the original names....the kid asked to be called by their new middle names after they were adopted....and those names have continued to this day. To me, it's purely an individual choice...and your baby is very, very young. Doing as JJ suggests, would be the way we would handle it.

I will add though, that if an adoptive couple promise to keep a birthname....they should abide by that promise........


Sincerely,

Linny