[dr. mom]

We are experienced adoptive parents with knowledge of many special needs and extensive medical training to care for children with trachs, g tubes, spina bifida, cp, ng tubes, central lines, etc. We live near excellent medical facilities and even a transplant center. We are open to race and special needs. We would adopt a child 0-7 yrs old, possibly older. We might also consider siblings! We are getting no where with the photolistings! We sent 16 emails around 3 weeks ago inquiring about specific children and got a response from 2 of them who told us the child was placed. I have also telephoned for info on 8 children . ALL but 1 (he has to stay in his home state) of those 8 has already been placed , including a listing that was updated yesterday, i vcall today and he's placed!!! That was fast! It seems like they are somewhat behind on this listings!!!!These photographs are all on the website, some even listed as NEW and yet these kids have families! That's great but why don't they then take them off thwe list??? I also saw a child who was last updated in Jan. 2000, over 3 years ago! Also, if a child has to stay in their home state, they shoulld specify that!
When I called one state and was told the child was placed, I asked if they might have any other children they might consider us for and offered to send my homestudy. She told me that unless I sent my homestudy for a specific child , it would not be read. I know there is a child out there waiting for us just as we are waiting for him/her/them. Anyone have any suggestions on how to work through this system and find the children that are REALLY waiting! Thanks! Also, some sites like Alabama have no contact info. Does anyone know who to contact if interested in an Alababma child???

[elefant99]

I don't know anything about Alabama adoptions, but I thought I could give you a tip about adopting special needs kids anyway.

I am a teacher at a residential school for children with special needs, and we have several children who are available for adoption through various county DHS's. Because these children have a residential/school placement, and are therefore "taken care of", it does not seem as though the counties work very hard to place them. Perhaps you could get some leads on available special needs children by calling schools for special needs children and asking to talk to the Social Worker on staff. They may be able to guide you a bit... Just an idea...

[angelical]

OMG! We are just completing our homestudy...and hoping and praying that our search for a waiting child goes smoothly. So I have no advice for you, but will tell you GOOD LUCK!

Reading your post makes me kinda sick to think that I've been looking at photolistings of kids that aren't available. As you said, it is great that they now have families, but what of us still looking?!

hugs!
Sharel

[dr. mom]

Thanks but my state does not have residential schools! We also do not have special day schools! In our state the children with specuial needs go to regular schools -- the least restrictive environment. There are only a few special needs children at each school . I know all of the special needs children at our local school and none are available. Could you give me some ideas on where these schools aree?? And , what about confidentiality, is it ok to call a school???

[elefant99]

That is very interesting that your state does not have residential schools or special day schools - that is the first I have heard of something like that... PA has found that in order to get the children with more intensive needs the best services available it is necessary to place outside the regular school system sometimes. Anyway, I could talk about the strangeness of LRE in various places and related theories like crazy, and it would be completely off topic...

Anyway, yes, you can just call the school and ask. Because of HIPPA laws the SW probably won't be able to tell you much about a certain child, but they can give you the information regarding their case worker and you could call them and go from there.

Where do you look? Well, I would have said anywhere, in any state! LOL But that was before meeting you... So, I'll just say you'll have to look around. I know in the Philadelphia/NJ/DE area there are a TON of residential schools - you could start with United Cerebral Palsy Schools, and go on from there. I know my school gets referrals from various places with emergency DHS kids fairly frequently - I work at a private school with an excellent reputation for both residential placement and school programs so we get many more referrals than we can take.

Hope that was at all helpful...

[LotAkids]

Dr mom,
Can't you work with an agency? My husband and I called a few different agencies out of the phonebook (we live in Colorado) until we talked to a real spitfire worker that really impressed us. A lot of the photolisting are out of date. It's just a fact. People don't have enough time in the day to keep them updated, which is very frustrating, I know.
You didn't mention an agency so I don't know what your situation is, but we handed in our formal application on February 18, 2003, and completed the homestudy quickly. Which wasn't a big deal at all. We were given an 8 month old boy April 10th and in November is our finalization. It couldn't have been smoother. I tried to start another one, but my worker said that we have to finalize on him before starting another. I can't wait!
Cost total: $2400.

[LotAkids]

By the way, Dr Mom, I forgot to ask you if you are only looking for a handicapped child or what, but our son is totally and absolutely perfect. No problems.

[dr. mom]

Thanks for the info!!! That is interesting that you are from PA! I have inquired aboput 4 children there , 3 were placed and the other one hs to stay in PA! Our state is one of the smallest population wise, and the workers here don't seem to actively try to place a child in an adoptive if they are in a foster placement. It seems like they only try and place if the foster placement is ending! I think there are 8 kids on our styate's photolisting! WOW!!

[dr. mom]

to lizpappas-
Our homestudy was done by a private agency and we have adopted from private agencirs before! I would do it again and would definitely be open to any child, he/she does not have to have special needs1 In fact, we inquired about an African American baby at a private agency. They were looking for either an AA couple or family with at least one AA child (which we have), thwy also wanted parents experienced with babies born addixcted ( we are). It seemed perfect but then we were turned downbecause they thought we had too many children! It is very sad because this baby still waits!!!We have also been turned before because of our ages!They think we're too old (45 and 50).
so it seems as if wee have alot of strikes against us!!!

[LotAkids]

dr mom,
I was just talking to our caseworker about this today. We want to start another adoption. My son's finalization has been set for early November and they won't even think of another before that date. Meanwhile these kids that desperately need homes sit in foster care. Why does it have to be so complicated?
One little boy that we have been interested in for over 5 months sits in foster care because his caseworker is so over worked that she has never responded to any of our agencies calls. When she has called back once, we had already taken our son and it had been three months since we had left her a message inquiring about him. It's a shame. Good luck to you though. None of those things you mentioned should be considered "strikes" at all.

[Aida]

Liz, could you provide us with the agency you are working with? I am really surprised that your adoption fees were just $ 2400 ... Thanks in advance, Sincerely, Aida

[shellia424]

Liz,
I would love some info from you as well regarding the agency....my husband and I were thinking of doing international due to some of the outrageous fees and wait time here...but I would to check into this aggency. Thanks!
SHelli
shellia424@earthlink.net

[LotAkids]

Certainly! We love our agency. It is called Adoption Alliance and is located at 2121 S. Oneida Street, Suite 420 in Denver, CO.
The head person, Barb Moe, is a real spitfire and is so unbelievable awsome to work with. She truely lives to place kids that need families. Our particular worker now is Melanie Tem and she also it marvelous.
I'm trying to think exactly how the fees went. We paid $850 when we turned in our application and then another $850 when our homestudy was done about six weeks later. So actually we only paid $1700. If there were other nominal fees, I can't even remember. We avoided international because not only are there so many of our American kids that are right here and need homes, but the costs are ridiculous.
Also, after finalization, you get half of your costs back!!! Beat that anywhere........and I'll eat your boots!

[LotAkids]

OOPS.....sorry guys, I forgot to give you the phone number for Adoption Alliance.
303-584-9900
Also their website is www.adoptall.com.
If you want to get more info you can call or email at "info@adoptall.com".

They are great. Good luck.

[Aida]

Hi Liz: Thank you for this informations - I will give them a call right away ... Again thanks - we appreciate it!!!