[Racer49]

Not sure if this is the correct place, but hopefully someone can help me. I live in Pa and I want to adopt my "son". Situation is, He is 20 months old, I have been the only father figure in his life. His mother and I are getting married in December and I would like to adopt him as soon as possible. She does not no who the father is because she was raped. She didn't file any charges because: she didn't know him, he threatened to kill her, and she was scared. On his birth certificate, it says "unknown" under the father column. I would like to know what steps I have to take to adopt him. I hope its a pretty easy process. Please, can anyone help me out?

[Dore]

I'm not a lawyer but in all states there is an abandonment period in tx it is 2 years some states it's as little as 6 months. After that time the b-fathers rights can be automatically terminated. Also in most state's to do a step-parent adoption you have to actually be married first before you can start process. Good news though if you have the patience and about 1,500 bucks for filing fees you can do most of it yourself.

[tobeafamily]

Racer,

My best advice is for you to consult with an attorney who specializes in adoptions and family law. The American Academy of Adoption Attorneys keeps its' member list online at www.adoptionattorneys.com - call several in your area.

Almost every state has statutes permitting termination of 'any unknown birth father', usually involving a publication requirement. An attorney can help you do this, then petition the court to name you a legal parent.

HTH, you may also want to check on the step-parent boards here.

Regina

[Racer49]

Thank you for helping me out. I gotta clear one thing up though, his birth certificate is BLANK for father. I've been told I gotta be married for a year and then I can adopt him. Everyone says about it has to be publicized, I wonder if there is a way around it. She absolutely does not want to put it in the paper. There should be a way you would think..

[tobeafamily]

Racer,

Even if there's no named biological father, publication usually is required. There may be exceptions in your state if the pregnancy was a result of a criminal act.

In most states the that require publication it is a classified ad be placed under 'legal notices' in newspapers that have statewide publications.

Again, best advice will be from an attorney with experience in this area of family law.

Best of luck.

Regina

[monroeman]

$1,500 just for a filing fee!!!! Sheesh! Dore, Texas needs to get that under control. Only $150 here in Utah. (Of course, the lawyer will be more.) Hope it's not so expensive in PA.

Anyway,

The previous post is right. You won't have a solid answer until you talk to a family law or adoption lawyer in your state. You can either find one through online listings, the phonebook, or a referral from friends or an adoptoin agency. Most agencies have a short list of tried and true lawyers.

Now having said that, I'm going to offer advice anyway. The only ways I know of to avoid publication is if the abandonment rule will apply (again, ask the lawyer), or waiting until the child is 18 years old and can decide for himself. Option 2 isn't that appealing.

Publication is usually low stress because your typical "uninvolved" father is not setting around reading the legal notices. Additionally, how likely is it that a rapist would come forward and admit guilt by claiming to be the father? I find it hard to believe that even if by some bizzare chance this individual did read the listing, that he would even recognize himself as the biological father.

I truly do understand the potential stress involved in this and do not want to minimize it in any way. With my own adoption experience we had so many setbacks that I did not believe we were finalizing until I was actually in the courtroom with the door closed and the baliff saying "all rise." Still, if you have to go the publication route, then it's 30 days and done. It will be a great feeling to see your name on the new birth certificate.

Hope this helps.

[Racer49]

I just contacted a lawyer and she told me I need to have it publicized. She said since she was raped, it should be put in a paper in that area, not in the area we live in. The father still needs his rights terminated even though he isn't around.

[BrandyHagz]

Racer,

In Texas, if the rapist was convicted of the crime that resulted in the pregnancy, he has no parental rights.

If he was not convicted, his rights still stand.

I'm not sure if he was or wasn't...but I saw rape and thought I should mention it