[sara&carlton]

Hello,

I am new here and finally got my husband to come around to the idea of foster parenting. May be some time though, as I found out that our local children's services people are about to strike and are not currently scheduling any classes. We are hoping for a girl since we only have two bedrooms and so she would have to share with our daughter until our condo sells.

We have an eight month old and a toddler. Does anyone have any ideas on how to prepare them for this? Also, how do you cope with other relatives? Do they usually come around? I think my in laws will hate the idea, and I'm not sure about my parents. We want to help children, but they don't get that. They think it's not fair to our kids. If we eventually adopt, we want that child to be accepted by them.

I love this board and have learned alot from reading the threads!

Sara

[Dmommab]

Hi Sara! I bet you are in Franklin County Ohio? LOL We are currently adopting a sibling group from Franklin County & our adoption worker told us they are probably going on strike May 18 so she won't be able to come to the adoption finalization on May 27. We have had 5 children from Franklin County in our home as foster children. We adopted one & are now adopting two more. Your daughter probably won't have much of a problem with the child sharing a room with her for now. She'll probably be excited about someone to play with. Only caution I have is just make sure you have time ALONE to spend with her still. Maybe your husband could spend alone time with the other child & you with your daughter & switch off every other night - even 1/2 hour works!! That way she won't miss that one on one time with you so much. Good Luck!! If you have any questions just ask - I'm sure you'll get LOTS of good advice.

[sara&carlton]

Thanks for the info and congrats on your adoption! Yes it is Franklin County! How long did licensing take?

[Dmommab]

Well, we aren't licensed thru franklin County. We went thru a private agency but it was about 6 months. If you have any specific questions feel free to email me or send me a private message. Good Luck!!

[brl]

I just joined the group, so I don't know where you are at in your process of fostering. I will try and help you with your parent, inlaws etc...

Most people are scared of anything new. Your family sees your sitiuation as perfect in the aspect of children. Why would you want to mess that up by taking another persons problems on. (Fostering).

They are in one way right, but in others wrong. They just want what's best for you, and probablly never hear anything good about fostering, just horror storys spread by the news and other sources that only speak of negative aspects of fostering.

(Example- A close person in my life is an elementry school teacher and she has had bad experinces with foster children at school. "They are developmentally delayed" "they are always causing trouble, the foster parents dont help out like the real parents etc..) But when we got involved she sees the story from a different angle. We adopted a boy and she loves him just as much as any of the other children.

Tell them fostering is something you want to try out. Fostering is not permanent. Lastly, do what your heart tells you to do, if you feel fostering is the way to go try it.

They will eventually, hopefully, come around and see the good in it.
Understand their concerns, listen, then make your own desicion.

Another child is going to be stess, extra work, burdensome, etcc. but it also will be a blessing.

[MOMommy]

Your story from your husband coming around to your inlaws is MY story. My husband has just came around to the idea that we could go to classes and (try this out) (fostering). Anyway I guess the Lord will make it known in our hearts about what is right for our families. Remember that your inlaws had the chance to make the right choices for their family and you have the right to make the right ones for your family.

Misti