[annie303]

Hi all

I may be fostering a teen. I've been thinking about fostering for several years. She already knows some of my family members. I have received mixed reactions from my family and friends, some think its the best thing I could ever do, others warn me that fostering a teen is inviting disaster. Everyone who knows her says she is a great kid.

So, I am not sure I really have a question, I just want to reach out to others who have been in my shoes or are going to be in my shoes. Its not even definite yet, I haven't gone through any screening processes or anything.

Thanks for "listening", I hope to get some feedback, positive or neagtive.

[Ms. Jackie]

As someone who aged out of foster care, I have found that ignorance about the types of children in care is very prevalent. Yes, there are some kids in care who have serious needs and issues. There are others (like me) who are better bahaved than most kids raised by their birth parents (I was always called "teachers pet" and goody two shoes" by my peers), more motivated (received a near full-ride to college, got my B.A. and do a lot of volunteer work related to foster care to this day) and who just want to be loved. You do what you feel is right and ignore people who are uneducated about the system.

[reba1]

Annie, You have to go with what is in your heart. Family and friends may mean well, but only you can make this important of a decision. I have been fostering for 7 years (teen boys for the last 3) and I love it. I actually can't imagine not doing it! (Even though I have 4 bios of my own). People imagine that ALL teens in foster care are there because of something THEY have done. It really bugs me! I think it depends a whole lot on the way you treat them from the minute they walk into your home. Even the "gangster" types are just looking for someone to love them and believe in them and you will not believe the difference it makes when they see that you trust them and believe in them...or the first time you stand up for them in a sticky situation...it means a lot and NORMALLY will make a difference in their behavior. I am not saying that there aren't any "dangerous" kids out there and you DO have to stay on top of things...just don't treat them like a criminal because of what their paperwork may say or because of what they look like...Good luck!!