[OhioFosterMom]

FMs boyfriend allegedly beat FC. : ( I found a new, sad but true news story. What would you have done? This MAY be what happened, but boyfriend is innocent until proven guilty.

You are a single foster parent. Your boyfriend allegedly slaps, then hits your 2 yr old foster son. You feel like it was close to a "beating".

CPS doesn't know that you have this boyfriend and you never told them about him. You don't consider him an alternate caregiver and you alegedly don't let him babysit the toddler by himself. Again, I'm supposing this from the story....

You notice the child is obviously bruised the next day. (I'm assuming this from the story) What would you do? This story is very sad. WARNING! click only after you've prepared yourself for a very disturbing foster care story. makes me

Man accused in brutal beating of toddler indicted | Cincinnati.com | cincinnati.com

[digmykids]

Good Lord! I would have been scared to death as the foster mom but I can tell you one thing for absolute sure...that child may have taken one smack from that man and that man would have been out!
She should be charged if she saw him beating the child for a couple of days and did nothing.
911 works great for DV IMO!
So sad, hope the little one is ok and has no long lasting issues from this monster!

[OhioFosterMom]

moms in general need to learn to kick out BoyFs who hurt their little one, even a little. I had a SW explain how that is something they work really hard on with the bioMoms. Some are emotionally needy or addicted to men and stay with ones who hurt their children. Sometime it's the babydaddy, sometimes not.

The fault lies with the FMs choices, not CPS.

Just goes to show you, if you know of a FP who hangs with someone shady, it's worth a heads up to CPS! I'd hate to rat on a fellow peep ---but the children are more important than the friendships. This woman's BFF most likely knew the boyF was bad news...

When in doubt, call the report line.

[MamaTay]

Originally Posted by OhioFosterMom

FMs boyfriend allegedly beat FC. : ( I found a new, sad but true news story. What would you have done? This MAY be what happened, but boyfriend is innocent until proven guilty.

You are a single foster parent. Your boyfriend allegedly slaps, then hits your 2 yr old foster son. You feel like it was close to a "beating".

CPS doesn't know that you have this boyfriend and you never told them about him. You don't consider him an alternate caregiver and you alegedly don't let him babysit the toddler by himself. Again, I'm supposing this from the story....

You notice the child is obviously bruised the next day. (I'm assuming this from the story) What would you do? This story is very sad. WARNING! click only after you've prepared yourself for a very disturbing foster care story. makes me

Man accused in brutal beating of toddler indicted | Cincinnati.com | cincinnati.com

From what the article says, your explanation of what could have happened, the BF "slapping" the child, is a far understatement. The child was hospitalized for massive head injuries and broken ribs and cardiac arrest. That isn't just a slap.

I would say the foster mom should not only loose the placement and her license but be charged as an accomplice if she didn't report this and seek medical treatment. I agree with others here that if the FM would have immediately called 911, put charges for DV on the BF and sought immediate medical attention, we would be talking about a different story here.

It is one thing to make a be a bad judge of character, have a BF slap a child in frustration but then seek immediately to remedy the situation. Quite another to watch that BF beat a child over the course of days and only report the problem when the child has been beat so badly that they have gone into cardiac arrest.

[elizabeth30]

I would have called the police, grabbed the kid and left, and dumped his #$& before he would have a chance. That's horrible! She sounds like she probably has a history of abusive relationships and they should be checking that before licensing.

[Momsalot]

My husband's ex was a FM (to her own niece and nephew) who had a BF who lived with her (unbeknownst to agency) who was involved in drugs, and someone drove by and shot at their house!!!! It was in the papers.

I called the CW to tell them of my concerns and they told me they "heard about me and I was very controlling and liked to butt in where I didn't belong"! Kids wound up getting adopted by her, and she is getting an adoption stipend for them, but she let them return to mom.

[shycar]

Ok first poor little guy. I hope he will be ok. Now the article that is posted did not say she was a foster mom, just that the child was under the care of this woman. That does not mean that she is a foster mom. It says the child was under her care, due to mom being charged with abuse. This could have been kinship care, this could have been just a friend helping out. I know many times when a police makes an arrest, they will ask the parents if they have someone to care for the child, if they say yes, many time solcial services will not be called and child will go with whom the parent ask. It also did not mention the child was slapped, it stated that he was beaten to the point where he had broken ribs and liver failure. Is there another article where it says it was a foster mom becouse I am curiouse and confused.

[sadoyle1216]

What it looks like to me is the child was legally in foster care, but had been placed with someone his mother named as a resource. It certainly comes no where close to excusing her actions and inactions, but to me, it seems like CPS is just as at fault. I've seen several placements that have left to go to a family friend or a relative that had a cursory eval and honestly shouldn't have been approved. Fortunately none have made the news here. The care giver should be investigated both by CPS and for criminal charges and my heart goes out to the little boy and his mother.

[TemporaryMom]

Originally Posted by digmykids

Good Lord! I would have been scared to death as the foster mom but I can tell you one thing for absolute sure...that child may have taken one smack from that man and that man would have been out!
She should be charged if she saw him beating the child for a couple of days and did nothing.
911 works great for DV IMO!
So sad, hope the little one is ok and has no long lasting issues from this monster!

Ditto! And what makes this worse is it perpetuates the negative image of foster parents. That bio mom has a nice lawsuit on her hands.

I pray that baby boy is ok.

I will tell you, they are very scrutinous of single moms here. I saw the forms the county required of my friends to complete and there were detailed questions about my dating habits. And the private agency, they did referrals by phone, they too asked about it.

I don't date, don't even try. I am 44 and super sized so usually only guys that go for my type are deadbeats. So sorry, not going to happen here. But, I made peace with being single after I kicked the last loser "to the curb" so to speak. I have never lived with a man romantically.

This FM should be charged if it is true she witnessed abuse and did nothing. We complain a lot about being held to higher standards and this is why.

[digmykids]

Even if she is not a foster parent and is in the "fictive kin" situation....no matter to me, when you sit by watching a child be beaten for a second let alone several days you absolutely deserve charges on some level.

[RavenSong]

I think the woman should be brought up on criminal charges, plain and simple. To be an eye witness to violence inflicted on a young child and not do anything about it...is so very wrong on so many levels. I'm relieved that the little boy is going to be alright...but it could have had a totally different outcome. It sounds like one of his broken ribs most likely lacerated his liver -- that's a very serious injury.

I'm sick to death of people beating up little kids...and I wish they'd all rot in some prison.

[TemporaryMom]

Originally Posted by RavenSong

I'm sick to death of people beating up little kids...and I wish they'd all rot in some prison.

My brother, who has been in and out of prison, says that they don't take too kindly to child and wife beaters in prison. When I said I don't buy that or why do they keep doing it when they get out. He just gave me that look and said "trust me."

So, I hope whomever takes care of this guy REALLY takes care of him, Dahmer style. He should NEVER be allowed to see daylight again.

[mom2fabtwins]

I mean no offense here, but i'm really concerned about Hamilton County Ohio. It might be that they are the only county that has a newspaper willing to report things, and other places are similar.....or it could just be a really messed up county. The past few years has not been kind in this county, Marcus Fiesel, and a couple of more recent, now this.
The man should be strung by his boy parts on a close line in the town square, and the woman should be stoned right next to him.
I am a single foster parent and can't imagine dating at this point. Temporary mom...I sooooo hear you.
If anyone so much a looked the wrong way at one of my kids....well let's just say, they wouldn't be around very long ....trash belongs on the curb, not in my house.

[mominalabama]

I am another single FM who is appalled with this story. The only reason I could see that the female caregiver isn't being charged is if she too had fresh wounds and bruises and such that suggested the Boyfriend had been beating her and the child over the course of days and that's why she was a witness to it but didn't report it?

There are alot of FM's out there who have live-in boyfriends that don't report that on their applications. I'm sure the CW's see them in the homes and they probably just say Oh he's my BF but doesn't live here. Sorry, I think anyone who spends a substantial amount of time around FC need to go ahead and have bkground check/CAN clearance done. That's what we did with two of my relatives who are frequent visitors and sporadic babysitters.

[going2bparents]

My mother lived with a man for my entire childhood who beat me and abused me horribly. Yet she stood by and didn't leave so we would have a father figure. She was just as guilty as he was since it is the duty of adults to protect children. So are the neighbors who witnessed him hitting me, the screaming... all the people who turned their backs. (Finally when I was 16 a pastor found a large bruise and stepped in. I will never forget him. Home life was still miserable after, but I was never hit again).

I didn't read the story. But Mom should have called 911 and had his butt arrested immediately. Our job - our DUTY - is to protect children from monsters. Anyone who raises a hand to a child is a monster.

And as a mandated reporter, she is bound to report. And if she didn't right away, she is absolutely in the wrong and should also be charged.