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Old 11-08-2011, 06:48 PM
justasmile justasmile is offline
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OT: Gift from dying grandmother to first unborn grandchild

Sorry this is both way off topic and very sad.

Friends of our family - their mom is passing away. Her youngest son and his wife are finally pregnant with the first grandbaby she would have. His father unexpectedly passed away this past spring. It's been an awful year.

anyway, my mom is visiting with her at home hospice and they are trying to brainstorm up a gift that grandma can give to the grand baby (unsure if it's a boy or girl) that baby can have forever.

Any ideas? Anything is appreciated. I'm really bad at figuring out gift ideas and googling this situation is just coming up with junk.
and - Married for quite some time!
and now we have.... FD - "GirlyGirl"
2012 - Licensed Foster Family
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Old 11-08-2011, 07:09 PM
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waitingtobeamom waitingtobeamom is offline
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My aunt did this when she was dying of cancer. She had my grandma go to the store and buy a bunch of baby clothes, both boys and girls and then paired them up one of each for daughter and all her nieces that would be having babies. They were put up for all of us to have at the appropriate time.

If they have time, maybe they could do simple scrapbooks of family pictures, or a letter for different milestones of the baby's life.

Husband "J" - married 6 years

AS - 9 yrs
AD- 6 yrs
AS - 5 yrs
AS - 3 yrs
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Old 11-08-2011, 07:12 PM
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linda512 linda512 is offline
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A video message from her grandmother would be great if she can do it. Or an audio one if she is nto happy with how she looks.
Adopted son from Guatemala
Born 11/15/05
referred 11/23/05
Home 7/31/06
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Old 11-08-2011, 07:18 PM
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tnlmommy2b tnlmommy2b is offline
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I don't know if she knows how or if she is up to it anyway but the entire year my grandmother was dying of cancer she crocheted a throw blanket for each of her 8 children and their spouses and each of her 26 grandchildren. Then she crocheted each of her grandchildren a baby blanket to use for their children. She also made a few extra in case any other grandchildren were born after she passed. So now each of us have our own throw and a receiving blanket to use with each of our babies. They mean the world to all of us. I don't know if thats possible. The other thing she did was buy each of grandchildren a piece of jewelry that she picked out for each of us when she was on her death bed in October so that on Christmas we each had a gift picked out from her to open 2 months after she was gone it meant the world to us.
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Old 11-08-2011, 07:20 PM
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mom2fabtwins mom2fabtwins is offline
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I love the book where you can record your voice telling the story. I think something like that would be great. But I like the thought of letters for different occasions.
16 Kids have come.....some have gone.

Current Kiddos
AS - Sonny Boy - born 2008/adopted 2010
AS - Guy Smiley - born 2008/ adopted 2010
AD - Girlie Girl - born 1995/home 2009/ adopted 2011

FS - Lil Bill - Born 2008/ placed 2010....TPR 2014?
FD - Honey child - Born 2011 placed 2012....TPR 2014?
FS - Mr ya sure-born 2009 placed 7/2013 future?
FS - Screech-born 8/2012 placed 7/2013 future?
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Old 11-08-2011, 07:43 PM
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momraine momraine is offline
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If she is religious she could leave her Bible with verses underlined and notes in the margins and such. I have a friend who treasures her grandmother's bible, it's pretty beat up and has lots of notes in the margins and such that my friend reads and treasures.
Lorraine Mom to:
S- my 21 year old son -Aspergers, but doing great!
W - my 19 year old son- caretaker to all.
P- My 15 year old Russian princess, two prosthetic legs, dancer extraordinaire Home June 2000
M- 14 RAD, No legs, one arm, fast wheels!
Home Nov. 2006 from Poland!
Dh - Often just another child, but mostly my best friend and a pretty understanding guy.
A clean house is a sign of a broken computer.

Moderator Go team!
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Old 11-08-2011, 07:46 PM
PerfectWings PerfectWings is offline
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I would definately do one of the recordable books, they have so many choices these days. You can find them at any hallmark store, I think target and walmart carry some of them. It is easy and yet very personable, especially for someone that is so sick.

I personally might also get a bible, and write a letter inside the bible. It is something that was given to me by one of my grandparents, and I love getting to open my bible and remembering my grandma.

I also have a blanket that my grandma made for me when I was a baby, it also means the world to me.

An ingraved piece of jewelry is also something that would be treasured. Like a cross or braclet.

There are so many keepsakes that can be done, it just depends on how strong she is and how much time she has left.
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Old 11-08-2011, 08:12 PM
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digmykids digmykids is offline
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A letter! I did not read the other posters yet and hope I'm not repeating but a letter would be fantastic.
This just brings me to tears, my sister wanted to live long enough to see her grand kids through another sports season and she did...that was her gift to her and them.
My niece battled but when it was pretty sure she was on the down slope she wrote her daughter (then 8) a letter for her 9th birthday.
Nothing gives like words and though it will be many years before this child will really "get" it....he/she WILL get it.
I'm sorry this is happening, I cant even think what it would be like to know you are going to die and have things you still need to do. <sighs> (((hugs)))
AS 25 yrs old
AS 24 yrs old
BioS 16 yrs old
BioS 12 yrs old

Current placements:

FD Newborn plan: TPR. ADOPTION BY US!!! placed at 2 days old 1-14
FD 8 Plan: RU but staying for a while 10-14
FD preemie sibling to older baby. Plan: requesting TPR and bypassing RU. We will see. 2-15 placed at 3 days old.
FD-12 Plan: RU

Former placements: Just too many to put down now. We do ER work as well as long term
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Old 11-08-2011, 08:38 PM
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theLBs theLBs is offline
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My mom died two weeks after we brought Peanut home. I think she held on until he was born. She had my sister go buy a bunch of baby gowns because she said they were easiest to use when you are changing diapers. I know it doesn't seem that sentimental, but she knew she wouldn't be here to give me advice along the way. This was her advice for a newborn. I'd give anything to have her to call for advice. She'd be so excited to see a peanut crawling and laughing and clapping and standing up. I treasure those little gowns. We are also fortunate to have many, many pictures of my mom holding, feeding, and napping with my son. He got a lifetime of Nana in those two weeks. My suggestion is that your mom help her write down parenting advice. . .all of those things she won't be able to tell her in the years to come. they're in my prayers. It's THE hardest thing I've ever lived through...
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Old 11-09-2011, 04:01 AM
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bromanchik bromanchik is offline
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I think the best gift would be an ethical will.

it is a great way of passing on wisdom.
Brenda Romanchik
Insight: Open Adoption Resources & Support
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Old 11-09-2011, 05:28 AM
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greenrobin greenrobin is offline
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letters of advice from grandma.

things that only grandma knows about to share as a secret with her granddaughter, told in grandma's voice, given at the appointed time.

kind of like messages from the past, talking about how much she loves her, things from that age when she was a child, just stuff that she would share anyway given the chance.
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Old 11-09-2011, 08:09 AM
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BethVA62 BethVA62 is offline
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My adopted great grandmother made baby quilts for her great-grandchildren to give to their future children.

She assembled a simple book that had pictures and stories of her family, generations that she'd created, generations that she knew and met, and ones that had died before she was born and had heard stories of.

In the book she also stated what she would like for us, how she hoped we could learn to think and feel about life and love, if we didn't already.

She also wore a necklace daily that her husband made for her. It was a heart of gold with a daisy (her name) and their last initial on it. My mom had copies made and all of Daisy's decendents were given one at her death, or at their birth.

She died when I was a teenager, and even tho she was my adopted great grandma, it's all a treasure that still means a lot to me and mine.
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Old 11-09-2011, 09:00 AM
Dickons Dickons is offline

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I have my grandma's wedding and engagement ring and have left it to one of her great grandaughters in my will to ensure it stays within the family.

I would ensure the child understand it is to be passed down to the first great granchild, etc to create an never ending tradition.

I also think any other favorite item she used throughout life is a good thing - I treasure many things simply because of their connection to people.

Kind regards,
“Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Old 11-09-2011, 12:07 PM
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feelingreyt feelingreyt is offline
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After my dh's granny passed away, his mom found a quilt granny had made in a bag in the back of her closet. On the bag was a note that said "Made for S's baby". No one knew about this special gift, only Granny. We were just newlyweds and not even expecting yet. Talk about surprised. We treasure that quilt!
Not flesh of my flesh nor bone of my bone, but still miraculously my own......
Author Unknown
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Old 11-09-2011, 03:23 PM
justasmile justasmile is offline
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thank you so much! I will share these with my mom- she's been sitting with her lots of evenings. The Bible idea is just so wonderful and would fit her perfectly.
and - Married for quite some time!
and now we have.... FD - "GirlyGirl"
2012 - Licensed Foster Family
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