[shy_bear]

We are thinking of adopting again; we are trying to decide if we should go private vs. CPS. We are looking for a young child; 0-5 of any race, BUT who is either in the process of being TPR'd or already is. We also don't want any major medical or emotional issues. I contacted one private agency and they said they don't even place under age 2. I have always heard and thought that if a county has a young child who becomes available for adoption they are going to look at their families first; is that true??? In our FASD support group there are several families who work with a private agency that we are looking at, but most of them are just fp's and those who have adopted have kids with some pretty serious issues. For those of you that live in an area where you can choose private vs. cps and chose private would you tell me why????

[crick]

We chose private because we wanted a better support system both during and after placement. We also wanted someone experienced on our side to help us determine any issues in profiles for red flags etc. Our cw came along on our first few visits and offered her opinions and observations which were extremely helpful. One of the best things is the post placement service which is available forever really. They have support groups, events and are just a phone call away if I need anything, even now after 7 years.

[shy_bear]

All of our issues were post TPR; First, our son should have got a financial subsidy. They put us in a postion of if we fought they would delay finalization and they knew we were moving so that was not an option. We were told that the adoption worker would contact the biorelatives to get some kind of info. The day of finalization on the elevator I asked again if she had contacted them. She told me to let it go; he was better off not knowing anything!!! The case was closed so she had no authority to contact the relatives. We ended up calling ourselves to get some basic health info. We have asked for assistance now and were told there is nothing they can do. So having support is a big thing for us!!!

[OakShannon]

She should have. She had no right to make that decision for you and your son. You are the parents! But once the adoption is final, we were also told that the door was closed. They could no longer tell us anything at all. I'm sorry that happened. I hope you are able to get information on your own.

We went with a private agency for the same reasons Crick mentioned. They gave us a lot of hand holding and support during the process and they still have therapy groups, support groups and play groups that we have access to whenever we need or want them.

Yes, most counties do call their own families first when they are trying to place a child. But that doesn't necessarily mean that you will only be matched with children who are harder to place or have significant issues. It really depends so much on where you are. We were matched with a healthy infant from another county who has no behavioral, medical or developmental issues. (Although we were open to all three to some degree.) But the area he is from matches almost all of their AA boys out of county because their families are generally not open to them. So that's why we have our beautiful boy. Sad, but that's the reality. I know several families who have adopted infants, many of whom have no major issues, through our agency. The fact that private agencies can work with any county in the state can counterbalance the fact that individual counties call their own families first.

Some agencies do specialize. There are two local FFA's who only place older kids. So you might check to see which one best fits your needs. Maybe the one you called only places older kids and that's why they told you they don't place children under age 2.

[DannieAS]

Originally Posted by crick

We chose private because we wanted a better support system both during and after placement. We also wanted someone experienced on our side to help us determine any issues in profiles for red flags etc. Our cw came along on our first few visits and offered her opinions and observations which were extremely helpful. One of the best things is the post placement service which is available forever really. They have support groups, events and are just a phone call away if I need anything, even now after 7 years.

I think you have to research your state and see what services are provided through agencies vs. CPS.....I will have access to what Crick wrote with my county....BUT I do remember that the last day of my class, the sw teaching told us that if we move, to be really, really, sure, because some other states don't have the resources that is offered here.

I think there are pros and cons to both agency and CPS...go with what you feel will be the best for your family. Also know that just because counties may place with their families first doesn't mean that there are only 'hard to place' kids available for the agencies...it could be that one county has a great need to place children and there are only a handful of families available at that particular time.

[simplemom]

We chose private and have been thankful that we have a social worker who is on our side. We are in permanency planning foster care and did have a placement of a newborn. Most of the children placed through our private agency are under 3. We have had a hard time communicating with our county workers because they are so busy (and we never hear from them nor do they return our calls) but our private worker always has time and support for us. She also knows the rules and laws better than the county worker and has gone to bat for us when they were telling us we had to do something that we were unable to do.

[crick]

Dannie - so in your state if you adopt through the state you have your own cw that advocates for you and is separate from the sw that is advocating/placing the children? And they offer post placement services for life if needed? Wow! Wish our state did that! It might vary by county, but mostly from what I hear from others, as soon as the adoption is final the county basically says "buh bye and best of luck".

[DannieAS]

Originally Posted by crick

Dannie - so in your state if you adopt through the state you have your own cw that advocates for you and is separate from the sw that is advocating/placing the children? And they offer post placement services for life if needed? Wow! Wish our state did that! It might vary by county, but mostly from what I hear from others, as soon as the adoption is final the county basically says "buh bye and best of luck".

yup, there is a post-adoption unit that handles 'problems' that come up when you call, has resources, will trade in your monthly adoption subsidy if RTC is needed and will pay up to 6K a month (assuming you are involved and part of the team) so no there is no 'see ya' and there are classes you can take for different issues that may come up....now I know this is for my county, It could very well not be the same in another county...

ETA: oh yes, there is a matching team that is in charge of which kids should be placed where......it then goes to my cw that reviews it and kicks it back or calls me about it....they basically handle the meeting where they choose between families so I don't agonize over whether or not I'm first pick for a child....then my cw goes over the info with me and will help me out til the adoption is finalized....after that....I get all the numbers for the post-adoption services....

I guess that's why they stressed to know where it is you are moving, because not every place is the same with the same services etc.