[bluebird38]

In our state we are allowed to attend termination hearings. However, in our county we are not. So, would you go and sit in the hall during the hearing or would you stay home and wait for the cw to tell you how things went? Our cw usually doesn't come out between hearings anyway. They just stay in the courtroom even during other cw's cases.

[mommytoEli]

if i had to sit in the hall, i probably would not go. i did go to one, and was glad i was there as the parents did not show, and i got to meet the judge who had been on our son's case for a year. it was an interesting experience.

[mamachell]

I probably wouldn't go just to sit in the hallway. I might if the cw would agree to come out and tell me what happened. Are the bp's going to come? Could it be "messy" with bp's? Do they expect to TPR that day or could it be dragged out? These would be somethings tha would influence my decision.

[MassachusettsMom]

I went to my AS's birthparents' TPR, even though I had to sit in the hall. The BPs didn't show (as was expected), but I had a nice chat with the family caseworker and DCF atty who were able to give me information that I wouldn't otherwise have gotten. Plus the CW came out and told me the verdict after less than a 1/2 hour, and I was able to call home with the news right away.

[excited2adoptsoon]

Are you sure the social worker will be there? Our case workers didn't show up to any of our court dates. If you can find out who the child's lawyer is, maybe you can get a word with them, if the worker is not there. I know with us, it took the social worker about 7 days to get any info from our TPR date. Thank god I was at court and found out myself that day.

[alex9179]

We went and sat in the hall for 4 days, and on the 5th day we testified. All I did was think about what awful things could be happening in there and DH was going crazy from the inactivity and the fact that no one could tell us what exactly was going on in there. It was not fun, but everyone involved knew who we were and that we were there for the kids. It was a way to show our commitment to them now and in the future.

I vowed to myself that I would never get involved in another situation like this, but the courts have another plan. The TPR was recently overturned and Biomom was granted a new trial. We are not what you would call lucky! We all have to go through this ordeal all over again and relationships have changed enough to make me dread it.

If you are an adoptive placement, I recommend that you attend.

[naca]

I've went to both the TPR's for my kids so far and will be going to yet another later this month. We were allowed in the court room to listen to everything both times (I testified the 2nd time) but we do not normally get the verdict the same day. How reliable is your CW on calling you to keep you updated? Knowing my CW - I'd probably sit in the hall so I could speak to her or the attorney and find out how things went b/c she wouldnt' call me for days and I dont like the suspense.

Good luck!

[shaslove]

I have attended every hearing I can with C, we are allowed to be in the hearings. I learn a lot everytime I go. I would still go to a TPR hearing, even if I was in the hallway, because I would want the CW to know I was there.

[Sunnyblu]

We (either my husband or a good friend) go to every court date and we go early. (In fact, we've been to more than biomom and no other family members have shown up). I'd go because more happens in the hallway than in the court. You get to hear everyone talking about the case, everyone sees that you're there and are supportive, you get to meet people you may not have met and there's no way I could wait at home for someone to tell me what's going on. I also think it could be good for the judge to get use to and know your face. I would tell the caseworker to stick her head out and either a thumbs up or down and you can talk about it later. But I can't stand now knowing. I swear this fostering/adopting thing has brought out more control issues.