[bigtalker]

We have five kids in the house right now 6mo., 2, 3, 4, 5 years. I have had many kids five and under. My own children are five months apart. For some reason the fighting with this group is so out of control. They compete over EVERYTHING. They fight over who gets in the car first, who gets the blue spoon, who gets dressed first and on and on and on. The other day they all came to blows after an argument about who has a birth mother in jail and who does not. "My birth mom IS in jail. Well my mom is NOT in jail. Well my mom's jail has cookies ha, ha! well my mom's house is better than your mom's jail" Help I am losing it.

[aedems]

I'd assign each a color....it also makes them responsible for that color. I did that with mine after they kept saying..."It is not my cup, its hers", etc., etc. I'd also make a point of overly and abundantly praising the one who didn't ask for something or who wasn't acting out. I would probably also put some daily common occurrences down....such as who gets to pick the television show.....and put it on a bulletin board that you can control so everyone gets a "first turn". That is a hard age group. They are all fighting for one thing....and that is top man on the totem pole. It sounds as if you have different families too, so you may already have some oldests fighting oldests or babies fighting for the baby spot. Good luck!

[CaddoRose]

I second what Aedems said. Make a chart and list all the big things they do each day and who goes in what order. Change the order so each kid get something first. Any argument means they lose that turn and go to the bottom of the line. If there is always a argument about the car, show them on the chart who is sitting where. Reward the child that does not engage in an argument and make it a big reward. If all kids engage, then you get the reward. I think eating a big ice cream cone in front of them will really help. They have to know you mean business! Reward the good behavior every time you can.

[Fatcat]

We also did a "kid of the day" and that kid got first choice, but it might be a little long for a preschooler to have to wait 5 days for his/her turn.

[cabbagepatchkid]

Originally Posted by bigtalker

The other day they all came to blows after an argument about who has a birth mother in jail and who does not. "My birth mom IS in jail. Well my mom is NOT in jail. Well my mom's jail has cookies ha, ha! well my mom's house is better than your mom's jail" Help I am losing it.

This is sad and funny at the same time!

I ran an in-home daycare for many years and found that sometimes it's one particular kid that will "flavor" the whole group. Whenever that child was absent things would be so much calmer. Possibly you have a troublemaker in the group.

Even so, kids this age will argue and fight over the silliest things . I had an argument here this morning because one kid was putting out the cereal bowls and his sister reminded him that he did it yesterday and 'why can't she do it today...blah...blah...blah' anyway it ended up with crying and a time out for the troublemaker.

[Biblemom]

We also do 'child of the day'. My four are 3 1/2 years apart but are a bit older than yours. The child of the day gets first pick of things when it comes up. They also get extra time with us after the other kids go to bed. Each child does have a specific color cup etc to keep confusion down. We also have a rule that if you do something mean to a child you have to do something nice to make up for it (ie hug, compliment, cleaning their room, doing their chore). I also have all their chores assigned and on a rotating schedule to keep things fair. Another rule is that if a child whines that someone has more of something (ice cream or whatever) it is taken away. If they argue over who is first they go last. Only takes this happening once or twice for the whining to stop!
I am looking forward to hearing everyone elses tricks!