[momsphotoop]

After I left the visit today, J's mom was waiting for me on the other side of the building. I got J in the car and Joey was helping me to get the stroller in the car in the pouring rain! mom approached me and was asking all kinds of questions but I could only understand a little of her broken Russian. she said she wants my address and phone number and wants the baby to call her in the evenings on the cell phone, she is 22 months old and mom is unstable I do not want to even start that.
She would not stop talking and kept asking me questions about where I work and if i have money, why I changed my hair etc etc... I called my caseworker as soon as I got out of there, mom was so sneaky so I am sure she knows what she did was wrong. Mom is supposed to leave through the front of the building and I am supposed to pick up in the back. Is this something I should be worried about? My husband is really pissed that she did this especially with our son there who BTW just wanted to chat the night away with J's mom lol he is too funny! I had to keep telling to get in the car!

[CaddoRose]

I don't think I would be worried, but definitely tell the CW. I hope they have acquired a Russian translator for her at some time to explain things to her. If they haven't, it may cause problems in court if the case ever came to TPR. The state would have to show that she understood and her attorney would show that the state did not provide the interpreter.

She probably thinks that she can talk to you anytime she wants as long as you agree with it. I wouldn't do that myself because I like there to be a CPS person standing there when I have conversations with bios. Your case is so difficult because of the language barrier.

Just let the CW know what happened and let her handle it. If it occurs again, then I would make certain that you are allowed to leave first and that the CW keeps her in the building long enough for you to be long gone.

[carlychan]

I agree that I don't think I would be too worried about it. If mom is a pshycopath anti social crazy lady, maybe. I think most bio's are ok people with bad circumstances. My experience is only with 1 family though. I would tell the CW and not worry too much about it. It is rare that a birth family "goes crazy" and does anything harmful.

[mamachell]

Sorry, but I would have some concerns. I also wouldn't have any contact not set up and approved by the cw. You don't want any misunderstandings. I just got myself into a bad situation by speaking to birthmom and she totally twisted what I said (also because I was cornered after a visit in the parking lot) and ended up having an unscheduled extra visit she said I Ok'd. We also had another "misunderstanding" last week about visitations so from now on, no contact with her besides a polite hi and bye. If she tries to speak to me further I'll tell her we need to speak with the cw.

By no means give her your personal info.

You may want to ask to leave first and have her stay with your cw for about 10 minutes to give you time to leave. Your cw doesn't even really have to tell her, they could just "catch up" and check in for a few minutes while you have a chance to leave.

[momsphotoop]

security usually holds her there for an extra 10 minutes while i leave becasue she used to tell them she was going to walk around to see me. They must know more about her because they told me in the beginning that they didn't trust her. And the supervisor always walks us out to the car chatting with us but it was torrential down pours this afternoon and I brought my son with me to help while I got the baby in the car and he helped with the stroller and tons of stuff mom brings, so I told the supervisor to stay in the building.
As for the translator, they gave her a Russian translator, actualy two of them and both said mom speaks Russian mixed with other languarges and it makes it very hard for them to make out everything she says. Mom did tell me today she is taking english classed, so hopefully in a few months that will help the situation.

[jeni-b]

I would be guarded. We have had a situation arise after a good relationship with the bios. you never know when good will turn bad in an instant. If the caseworker feels she is volitile, then by all means protect yourself and take all precautions.