[Prettyboicris]

If a child is freed for adoption or on a TPR track what do you do if the child's biofamily (whether it be a bmom, bdad, grand parents, aunt etc) come up to the child while you are out with them? I know that on a very practical level you should contact the worker but in terms of feeling safe and maintaining your privacy and in some cases safety what do you do?

[jarian]

I would love to hear answers on this one. When we had my foster son, I was always afraid we would run into his family.

[timleenettesue]

We have run into bio family both before and after tpr.
The before tpr was at wal-mart with biomom and aunt. Everything was fine, they said hello to the kids and gave them hugs and went on their way. I did contact the worker just so it would be on record to cover my own butt if anything was said.
The after tpr was at meijer with the bio aunt and uncle. They were nice and asked if they could talk with the kids. The kids did not remember them and seemed pretty freaked out (because strangers were talking to them), but over all it was fine. I even gave them pictures of the kids I had in my wallet.

[c.a]

Absolutely notify your worker.

Otherwise - I think the answer sort of depends on the situation. Are there visits? How do visits go?

If it was the parents - and there were regular visits I would say hi and move on.

My first foster child had a wonderful extended family. We agreed to celebrate his birthday together during the first month he was in foster care. The grandparents were extremely supportive of us as foster parents and once picked him up at daycare for me when he was sick and I couldn't get there right away. I would run into his aunts and uncles in public and they were wonderful. He is now reunified and I still run into them every once in a while and they give me updates on him.

I have had other foster kids where I would probably leave wherever I was immediately and be dialing 911 before I was out the door.

I think there are lots of ways to handle it. It also isn't a bad thing to talk with the social worker about.

Good luck.

[TxMom65]

When my daughter was placed with us she was free for adoption. It was a fear that I had as well.
I discussed with her what we would do if we saw someone she knew. She was/is afraid of this as well and even being kidnapped.
We just discussed her just staying calm, that we could say hi, and that she just had to stay close to me and I would be in control. I try to assure her that nobody will take her and it is OK to say hi and walk on. I told her that if I say we are in a hurry then we are in a hurry!
So far, nobody has approached us.

[fostapeepz]

We live in a very rural area, about 90 miles from a city big enough to have a walmart (and the city the girls came from). We just quit taking them shopping with us when we go to that city, and if we were going to take them with us, we would go to another city. Running in to bio-family at this point is not something we want to deal with.

[Boulderbabe]

FWIW, I live in a small town, and it's never happened to me. I avoid the courthouse lawn, where the homeless and the drug abusers hang out, but other than that, I just go about my business.

[stevenstwin]

We've run into extended family on a few occasions. My FS was older so I usually just hung back and let him say hi or whatever. We never had any problems of any kind. I also have a friend with younger fc's who ran into extended family at WalMart (must be a popular spot ;-) without incidient. I'd far rather run into extended family than the bios the child was actually removed from, anyway.