[faithlovehope09]

I literally have had the most emotional past few days and I'm so confused i am not sure myself what's going on at this point! I am certain that there are many other Foster Parents that have gone through this exact same thing which is why i am posting this thread so that i dont feel alone and realize this may be very common.
This week DH and I were told that we were going to be getting another placement baby newborn girl and that relatives that already had bio mom's other child turned baby down. Then we were told the relatives were thinking about it more and that they may be interested in taking baby which is understandable. they were only willing to take baby short term and hoped bio GMA would pass homestudy. no guarantee that GMA would pass so Then we were told they turned it down and we were getting her again. Now today they found out a different relative is already a foster parent and they might be interested in baby although they typically dont take newborns. Then CW calls back and says they made a decision to not place with other relative/foster parent because it may not be good for the baby as mom would know where they live etc. so baby at this point was ours again. Then CW calls and says FP called in and said she really wants to think about it and that they realize mom knows where they live but she wants to talk with her DH. so now i am on standby ONCE AGAIN and i'm so confused by this back and forth thing. I realize that being a FP means you have to be prepared for relatives to pop up even out of the wood work however this is just amazing to me. I have been told 3 times now that we were getting this placement and she's still in the hospital poor thing!
Is this common? should i say Welcome to Foster Parenting and get used to it? I'm just hoping that i can emotionally handle this. I am just trying to say if it's meant to be then she will be placed with us and if not, she will be with her relatives. I'm just all over the place and so new to this. ugh! any thoughts i would so appreciate it!

[Sam-N-Tony]

I hate to say it but get used to it. Up and downs don't stop after you get a child, at least they are thinking of placing the baby with family first, which is best case scenario, IMO.

If it's meant to be, it'll be. Hang in there.

[CaddoRose]

My own experience hasn't been this way, but this is what our classes prepared us for. I did get a call about a sib group, but by the time my CW got back to them, they had been placed with someone else. I have learned that until the judge signs the TPR order and we are the adoptive parents, it is not over. Anything can happen and it's a long road.

Your scenario sounds like what can happen on any case. When they can they are always trying to keep kids with relatives if it is a good situation and they will go to great lengths sometimes to make that happen although I know there are lots of relatives on the foster forums who have fought long and hard to get their relatives placed with them after the children had been placed into care.

When you get a placement, you never know how long they will be with you. 24 hours, a week, months, or forever. It's just the nature of the system. You can't take it personally if they end up elsewhere. Only you can decide if this is something you are emotionally capable of doing. I always try to keep in mind that my job as a foster parent is to provide a loving home for a child regardless of what the courts/CPS does.

[Mkap]

I don't mean this to sound hard or thoughtless, I know what you are going through is difficult. But, you are fortuntate that they are looking closely at relative placements prior to baby girl coming to your home. Once the baby is with you it is a million times harder to let them go when the relatives pop up. Hang in there.

[Larue]

I don't have any advice. But just wanted to say, as someone who may be in your shoes one day soon, that I understand how emotional this must be. Best wishes!