[Kristin7]

The girls had their last visit with mom/my sister last Friday. TPR was done in early December, but I wasn't supposed to tell the girls since CW wanted mom to have to deal with the girls and questions and so forth. So cw told mom that she had to tell them at the visit. Well of couse she didn't and cw brought them home to me after the visit and she and I sat them down to tell them about the TPR and the judge saying that I could adopt them. I was prepared for a hard night of questions and emotions etc....but I didn't get it. Girls weren't upset. They simply asked if it meant they would never see mom again. I told them that wasn't at all the truth, but that visits wouldn't be weekly....and probably not monthly either. Both wanted to know how soon they would be adopted and when I could start making decisions for them on my own without the States involvement. LOL. Then the 9yr old asked if the cw could be a babysitter for them now. LOL.

So......i guess things are better than I thought it was. I'm open to any questions that they may have...and we'll take them one at a time with honesty and care.

I almost can't believe that we are nearing the end. its been a very long 7 years. What will i do with my time and energy that I used to spend on worry/stress??



K.

[bethy724]

Congrats!!! It sounds like the girls are secure & stable in your home (their home)

[kxl164]

I'm glad the girls took it so well. It sounds like they might be needing a bit of a break for all of the stress too and are looking forward to you being the one responsible for them... they trust you to be make the best decisions!

I don't know what you should do with all of your extra time... just sit back and enjoy watching the girls live and grow in peace. You all deserve that!

[Yash]

Originally Posted by Kristin7

So......i guess things are better than I thought it was. I'm open to any questions that they may have...and we'll take them one at a time with honesty and care.

I almost can't believe that we are nearing the end. its been a very long 7 years. What will i do with my time and energy that I used to spend on worry/stress??



K.

Give them a brother?

[CaddoRose]

That sounds so great. I knew you were stressing about the last visit and whether the girls would need/want more visits with bioMom. I think it just shows what you knew already about the Mom, she isn't interested in what is best for them since she wouldn't tell them about the TPR and left that to you, so you would be the bad guy. Turned out, you're the good guy and the kids know it!

[Hadley2]

Well, wow. What a relief, eh?

We found that once fd/niece was not required to visit, she has had no desire to talk on the phone or see either first parent. She's 9, now, so I respect her wishes. She does receive mail and I do require her to send thank you notes at Christmas and b'day, just as she does for every other gift she receives. She has no problem with that.

Much, much, much of the tension drained out of her, slowly and with, ahem, more than a few fits and starts. We still have near-daily moments and periods of her behaviors of choice, but nothing like when the case was active.

Getting adopted has been her focus since the initial TPRs. We should be filing any time now, lawyer is checking last details on terminations, etc.

Congratulations. Breathe in your extra time. Exhale....

[lambeausam]

Sounds like the girls took the news pretty well. There may be some fallout later, but it's good that they were asking questions.

Any idea when the case will get an adoption worker?

Sam

[Kristin7]

I"m not sure that adoption workers are assigned here...as the cw told me she would be checking in on us monthly from now until finalization. So maybe i will have two workers? Not sure though.

K.