[bigtalker]

So I just got two new little boys on Monday 2 and 4 years old. Tuesday another of my kids had a dentist appointment. My dentist office has a large slide in the lobby. The boys were playing on the slide and I was standing next to them playing with the 16 mo. old. Out of no where a lady comes over and bangs on the slide and points to the four year old and very loud and mean way tells him that he is running over the smaller kids and he better stop it. I was right next to him and he was doing no such thing. Too top it off her kid came over and slapped me on the back and ran away and she said oh, stop it. I did not want to make a scene at the dentist and embarrass the child as it was he went and hid under the slide. I said, very loudly, I am sorry. That lady was mean and you did'nt do any thing wrong. She does'nt even know you. I got him out from under the slide and walked past her and she flashed a smirk at me. I don't think I have been that mad at someone in a long time. I wanted to scream at her and wish I could tell her that this sad little boy had just last night seen his parents arrested and carted off to jail in front of him. I just took my kids in the back and she was gone when we came out. Would you have caused a scene and called her out? I wanted to but, thought I was too mad to be rational. Thanks for listening to my rant.

[Biblemom]

Causing a scene would not have helped the child. I think you did the right thing by just reassuring him and letting it go.

[chevyjewel]

I would have (as calmly as possible) corrected her misperception and stood up for the child, telling her he was playing just fine with the others, you knew because you were being attentive.

If her child would have slapped me I would have loudly proclaimed OUCH!!! THAT HURT!!! Please don't hit me again it's not nice!!! just as I do with all my kids.

***BUT*** you were right in following your instincts at the time. If you felt like things could have gotten out of control in confronting the situation then you absolutely did the right thing by leaving it as it was.


What breaks my heart is that's likely how that other child is handled himself at home. Kids model what they know. If he's equating his mothers repremand of you with physical violence and then retreating that's what I'd assume he's experienced himself. I get that kids hit, but when paired with what happened...

[bethy724]

I think you can chalk this up to an uptighte, rude, miserable human being. You did the right thing by not causing attention to the child as she did. I may have said "thanks for your input but I am RIGHT HERE & the child is under MY supervision & did nothing to your child" But assuring the child it wasn't his fault was the best thing to do-she was mean & he needed to understand that.

When people stare at me & my son (because I'm CC & he is bi-racial) I just think "you have nooooo idea what the 2 of us have been thru in our lives to be a family & would probably feel like an IDIOT if you did know staring at me w/ that snicker of an attitude"

People stare at multiracial families, families w/ a lot of children ect. I feel sorry for them that they have no life to keep themselves occupied or they pay no attention to their bratty children while staring at yours.

[OakShannon]

I agree that you did the right thing in focusing on your foster son's needs at that moment rather than giving that miserable person a well deserved piece of your mind - as satisfying as it would have been. It's hard to imagine someone who would behave that way toward a child in the first place becoming contrite and apologizing for her bad behavior when you pointed it out to her. More likely you would have opened yourself up to receiving more of her misplaced anger - which would have done your foster son no good at all.

[waited2long]

I think you handled it very well. I hope I do the same if I'm ever in a similar situation.

[thelowlanders]

I would say "Could you please clarify as to what exactly was done wrong to your child? I was standing right here and must have missed it?" With a huge smile and all the charm you can pile on her head

And likewise, respond in the "counselor voice" of concern when the other human's child behaved inappropriately. They can't really get all that mad when you keep that tone. There is nothing to repeat that you did "wrong". All the while, the kids learn to handle things calmly yet quite directly. No reason for un-needed rudeness.

[jllambert]

I think you did the right thing! I hate when people correct other children, but not their own!