[Mommyofthreetobe]

thou shall not strangle thy foster child...thou shall not strangle thy foster child....

If I keep repeating it...I wont be tempted any more.

I swear they are inventing reasons to scream at me, to fuss, to throw an all out tantrum. My wrist is clawed to carp form a flailing eight year old who escalated what should have been a small request to pick her home work up of the floor and let me help her with it. This after her screaming at the top of her lungs that she could not do it (she can) and crumpling it to throw on the floor.

Bmom canceled her visit at the last minuet today...they hurt when she see;s them and they hurt when she doesn't...Timeout bell is about to ring and release the prisoner....wish me god's speed

[meshsgrl]

I feel for you... altho mine are much younger (there is a reason I don't take school age kids)!!
this to shall pass....

[mommy2fiveplus]

I would like to patent aerosol sedatives and market them to foster parents. I know I would burn through a can of "Ode de Ativan" or "Plume O'Xanax" on a bad day.

Good Luck to you, may tomorrow be a day of sweet hugs and kidlet praise. Just tonight I was told, I make the best garlic noodles, it totally balanced out the screaming fit that occurred in front of the entire waiting room at the dr. office.

[jeni-b]

Can I tell you how happy I am to hear it is not just me!!! I have been in tears this evening having exhausted all my arsenal of ideas in managing these kids behaviors with no success.

I feel your pain! Tomorrow has to be better, right?!?! (nod yes - even if we know it might suck, nod yes)

[CaddoRose]

I'm nodding yes even tough they have visitation tomorrow and then all hell breaks lose! At least it's really just crying fits and such because they are only 2. 5 and 1 yr old. I think the 2. 5 yr old has decided that since she isn't in control of anything she will control what she eats. She was fine until baby brother got her 4 weeks ago and now she won't eat. Keeps asking for chips, cookies and pizza."sigh"

[thelowlanders]

hehehe That's my daily battle

[Mommyofthreetobe]

ahhh, misery loves company i guess!!! I'm sorry some of you have to deal with this too! After she screamed in time out for 15 minuets (we do one minuet per year old and then a another minuet for every ten seconds it takes me to wrestle them back in the chair but not to exceed 15 minuets.....) she came out cool as can be as if nothing happened...wanted to be all lovey too...Obviously I cant go about holding a grudge but I didn't exactly FEEL like giving hugs after she scratched me up like that.

I didnt even make her apologize cause I knew why she was acting out...I'm a horrible role model...

[HopingforAlex]

One of my favorite quotes from Anne Of Green Gables: "Tomorrow is another day, with no mistakes in it"

i have used it often

[Lorraine123]

When my child gets this disregulated, I restrain her to keep everyone safe. She will fight, but eventually she will learn that I am strong enough to keep her safe. Once she calms down, I hold her in my lap and look into her eyes and let her know that I love her. I never make my children apologize for actions that happen during a rage. I don't think they are intentional actions, instead they are acting out intense feelings. They should not have to apologize for their feelings. I do make them fix any damage they did. If I get scratched, they have to put lotion on my scratches. If I get peed on, they have to wash the clothes. If furniture gets broken, they have to do chores to earn $ to replace it. They must learn that these things are not acceptable. I work on the actions at home, but the feelings are addressed in therapy. Until the trauma is worked through in therapy, the behaviors will not change.

I have never had a child with birthparents visits. I so feel for you all. Its like an in-your-face reminder of the trauma they experienced. How hard that must be.

Don't strangle the child.... That would not solve the problem. Actually would create some new ones

[JessicaBaker]

Originally Posted by Lorraine123

Don't strangle the child.... That would not solve the problem. Actually would create some new ones

LOL!

Sorry to hear how rough it is. I agree with the other posters, tell yourself tomorrow will be another day.

[Pursuingmydream]

take a breathe and my a valium and it will all seem better the next day. This is how I deal with the family during the holidays.