[EAGLE6]

I made calls and emails to everyone I could on Monday- it got me nowhere. Well, it did get our CW to call me back. She basically told me "she's sorry I'm frustrated, but she was told by her CW they want to take the whole case slow before making any moves"....that was her explanation. She said she'll be in touch in the next few weeks or by the end of Dec. at the latest.....WHAT....this is just crazy....

[hkolln]

Maybe because of the Holidays she's not wishing to do alot of work? Just keep on her. We dealt with this attitude alot throughout our daughters case. You're only 3 weeks into it so it's pretty early. Just keep documentation on emails/letters and phone calls you make, whom you spoke to and about what. That's about all you can do right now.

Maybe she's not making any moves because she thinks the child will go back home?

[Mom2blessings]

Originally Posted by EAGLE6

I made calls and emails to everyone I could on Monday- it got me nowhere. Well, it did get our CW to call me back. She basically told me "she's sorry I'm frustrated, but she was told by her CW they want to take the whole case slow before making any moves"....that was her explanation. She said she'll be in touch in the next few weeks or by the end of Dec. at the latest.....WHAT....this is just crazy....

I was just reading through this thread and I have to agree with the consensus here....you need a lawyer, asap. The longer your relative is in foster care, the more bonded he/she is going to be to the foster parent, so time is of the essence. Unless CPS can show some reason why your home is not "fit" (and I'm not implying they can...I seriously doubt they can) they have a legal obligation to complete your study and place the child with you...I HATE how CPS plays games with the kids lives, for their various STUPID reasons.

I will mention one other option. I had a problem with getting our DFCS office to pay for the after school care, that some of our kids were in when they came to our home. They said they would when they placed them with us, then changed their mind when they got the bill. After a LONG battle over this, I contacted my local state representative. HE got involved and all of a sudden people were jumping through hoops for us...the director called US to rectify the situation. And yes...they paid for it as agreed. So contact your local representative...maybe he can help.

[Chancey]

Definately time to lawyer up. Get moving!!!!!!!!!!!

[EAGLE6]

Maybe she's not making any moves because she thinks the child will go back home?

I've heard that both my BIL and his girlfriend were told this is going to be a "long process" of getting the baby back by their caseworker. The police investigation is still well underway as well.

Anyhow, the delay I'm being told is coming down to the maternal grandparents filing for custody. However, as I posted in another post, Birthmom lives w/ them. So, I don't see where it would be a viable option to place the baby w/ them when in essence birthmom lives there 24/7.

[cantbuymeluv]

I have to run and didn't read the entire thread but.........take a look at what I did. I wrote a letter to EVERYONE, find out the director of CPS then their boss and then theirs, etc. UP to the governor. THEN cc the letter to senators, the VP, white house, and THEN the president and I guess president elect too! BE sure to send the letters with confirmation numbers (cheaper than certified I think) so they KNOW you mean business. Tell them FACTUALLY what has happened, your intentions, and recite some codes. THEN ask for a response withing 10 days, EACH day he is in fc, you LOSE rights. (Trust me, I know now.)
IF you are willing write to those same government officials and ask for a face to face meeting. They will probably wait to reply but alarm bells will start going off, big people will be WATCHING, trust me I know this too, and then REGULATIONS will have to be followed or............? Contact the foster parent ombudsman and file a complaint, paper them to DEATH, stomp your feet, don't worry about making them mad. THEY will be nice to your face and stab you in the back. Our SW is nice but is the one pushing for fp to adopt MY nephew!!!!!! PLEASE please don't let a day go by without putting things in writing.........a letter is harder to ignore!

I used REAL names when I sent this letter but here I kept out a few for privacy. Here is a copy and THERE are people watching! AND I forwarded copies to lawyers, advocates, more government officials, I think I am up to 50 people now LOL

K.F.
P.O. Box 923
Clovis, CA 92613

October 19, 2008

Glenn A. Freitas, Branch Chief
744 P Street
mail station 8-12-31
Sacramento, CA 95814

Greg Rose, Deputy Director
744 P Street
mail station 8-17-18
Sacramento, CA 95814

John Wagner, Director
744 P Street
mail station 8-17-11
Sacramento, CA 95814

Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger
State Capitol Building
Sacramento, CA 95814

Re: Baby R.
Baby R is my two year-old nephew. He has been in custody of the D N County CPS since November 23, 2007. Repeatedly, I have requested for an immediate foster placement, and eventual adoption of Baby R. Personally, I provided the department with Baby R's medical care providers' names and numbers, demonstrating that I was both the physical and psychological caretaker. I was more than happy to write letters, send gifts, cards, photos, and clothing to Baby R, as I have continued to do. Diligently, I asked each social worker involved with Baby R's case what steps I could take to ensure placement of my nephew. Unfortunately, I have been pushed aside and condemned for my efforts to try and care for my own blood relative.
Family Code 361.3 (a) clearly states that relatives have preference when it comes to the placing of a child. Not only am I a blood relative but I have provided the day to day needs of this child and treated him as if he were my own for the first nine months of his life, in my home.
Family Code 8700 (f) states that a relinquishing parent may designate with whom their child may be placed with for adoption. In this case BOTH parents; M.T. and R.S. have been asking to sign designated relinquishments from the State Adoptions A District Office and have been denied their rights. Repeatedly, both parents have requested meetings to sign the paperwork from T. B. and S. W. (Supervisor), since August 2008. T. B. has met with the parents on two occasions (while allowing one entire month to lapse between meetings) and still has NOT allowed the signing of documents necessary to have Baby R placed into my home in Fresno County, even with my approved State Adoptions Home Study, completed by the Fresno District Office. The Fresno District Office was the office to complete the home study due to the DENIAL of A District Office. They were so bold as to not provide a written request of the Fresno District Office, as is customary when an applicant lives out of the area.
It is evident that State Adoptions A Branch is biased and unwilling to be objective about the best interests of the child, Baby R. T. B. clearly exhibited her bias during recent testimony in D. N. Court on October 15, 2008, where she stated that Baby R was too fragile to be moved to my home. Baby R clearly has a relationship with me and is very comfortable in my care, as witnessed in photos and video of us together. Allegations of a fragile mental state were made, but we are now aware of an evaluation, by R. V., which resulted in a determination that no services were necessary because Baby R was doing fine. Even if Baby R were to need therapy or services adjusting to the transition into my home, I have made it abundantly clear that I will seek any help he may need. I have confirmed this fact in the past when Baby R was still in utero and after he was born. I personally found the medical professionals necessary to properly diagnose his heart anomaly and provided the necessary transportation and follow through to aid in his successful delivery and recovery. If not for my diligence, I dare to wonder what could have happened to Baby R. Of course, I will seek any and all medical and psychological professionals that he may need now and in the future. Isn't the best determination of future actions shown by past actions?
Both parents have been denied their right to sign designated relinquishments by State Adoptions in A. Both parents have stood in court to ask for placement of Baby R into my home and yet he lingers in the foster home that wishes to adopt him. Time is of the essence the .26 hearing is set for December 5, 2008. The foster parents have made it known in court that they want to adopt Baby R. Foster parents are necessary for temporary nurturing of a child and sometimes when reunification is not possible for the birth parents, but NOT when a ready and able relative has been requesting her very loved nephew since the beginning, especially when she has demonstrated her commitment to him in the past.
April 19, 2006 M.T. was seven months pregnant with Baby R and in a serious auto accident, where two people were fatally injured. She was airlifted to Redding Hospital.
April 20, 2006 M.T. had surgery to repair her broken left leg and left arm, rods were placed in both extremities.
May 2008 I drove M.T. from Redding Hospital to Fresno County, so that she and unborn Baby R would be able to receive proper medical care, there were some heart anomalies on the ultrasound.
Baby R was born 6-7-06 in Fresno County, with a medical team present and support for his heart problems. I was present for his miracle birth.
Baby R spent seven days in the NICU at Valley Children's Hospital. He received follow up care by a pediatric cardiologist, physical therapist, and pediatrician.
Baby R lived in my home, with my family and his mother for the first nine months of his life. Daily I cared for both Baby R, who was born with Ductus Constriction, and his mother who was recovering from the accident and surgery.
After 9 months Baby R and his mother moved to D. N. County, to be near Baby R's three, previously adopted biological siblings and Baby R's father.
November 23, 2007 Baby R was taken into custody of the D. N. CPS.
December 10, 2007 I sent D. N. CPS my formal request to have Baby R placed back into my home, as a follow up to a phone call to S. W. of D.N. CPS, stating the same.
January 2007 I officially received and began application for relative placement home evaluation.
May 5, 2008 my home was approved for relative placement by D.N. CPS.
July 24, 2008 and July 25, 2008 I had visits with Baby R in D.N.
July 25, 2008 I attended a court hearing in D.N.
July 2008 I retained an attorney in D.N. County.
August 2008 S.W. of State Adoptions A District Office, denied me an application for adoption. S. clearly stated, "that she did not want to waste state resources studying my home since she was not even considering my home as an adoptive home for Baby R."
August 21, 2008 I formally applied for adoption to State Adoptions Fresno District, on my own without a written request from A. District Office.
August 25, 2008 I filed a complaint with the California Foster Parent Ombudsman, Cynthia McDowell.
August 28, 2008 I had my relative placement home evaluation renewed and approved.
September 12, 2008 I attended a hearing in D. N.
September 12, 2008 and September 13, 2008 I had visits with Baby R in D.N.
September 14, 2008 I had visits with Baby R in D. N. (I also facilitated a sibling visit between R. and two of his biological sisters; J. and K. The first of its kind since R. has been in foster care.)
October 3, 2008 my home was approved for adoptive placement by State Adoptions Fresno District Office. (see attached)
October 14, 2008 and October 15, 2008 I had visits with Baby R in D.N.
October 16, 2008 I attended a hearing to request placement of Baby R, I was denied placement by D.N. County, with T.B.'s testimony.
October 16, 2008 I had an overnight visit with Baby R in D.N. County. (I also facilitated a sibling visit between J, K, and Baby R.)
In summary, Baby R is being denied his rights to his entire biological family. He is being held hostage by the foster parents, who although may care for him, are NOT his biological family. As his maternal aunt I have requested placement, his parents have requested he be placed with me, and to date no one can state as to why it would be, in fact, detrimental to him if he were. He is a miracle baby who has made it through an auto accident, his mother's surgery while in utero, an uncertain heart condition before birth, and now lingers in foster care. And despite this, he is an intelligent, gentle, and affectionate toddler who is happy and fun to be with. I understand the foster parent's affection for him, I am even grateful for their time, I have stated that I would continue their relationship as to honor Baby R's time with them. It is a travesty that relatives are condemned instead of commended for relentless efforts to bring him home to his family. By denying Baby R's placement into my home, State Adoptions A. Branch, is depriving him of his large extended family, sibling contact, and a supervised relationship with his biological parents. Baby R's best interests are, very obviously well served by placement with me as soon as possible.
I thank you in advance for your time and assistance in this matter. Time is of the essence and a little boy is waiting to go home.
Respectfully,

K.F.
cc: My attorney
Cynthia McDowell, California Foster Parent Ombudsman




Good luck! I will come back to this later. Maybe you can benefit from our pain and I guess "mistakes" even though we have been up front from the beginning. I KNOW legislation has to change, fp can fight relatives for adoption! I am still fighting but as you can see I WILL NOT STOP! A law suit against the state is my next route.........and the media...........

[hkolln]

Unfortunately "preference" is not the same as forcing placement. It is normally up to CPS to decide whom placement is with. They don't have to place with relatives in every single case....I know I found that out the hard way and had to fight too. As for "preference" that can be defined as only "Grandparents" or something else and if the Grandparents say NO then they don't have to look at other relatives. We even had my SIL on our side too whom stated she'd sign away rights if our niece was placed with us. Eventually it did happen but only after we did the same thing-contacted from the SW up to the Governor's office and even our state representative. Unfortunately the laws a so vague on relative placement that CPS can use that against relatives.

And I'm not saying unsafe or uncleared relatives either. I don't think if the relative is not a safe place for any child they should take placement. I'm only speaking of the relatives that are cleared (such as how we went thru the entire foster care licensing).

[cantbuymeluv]

I agree that relatives need to have clearance too. We have had 2 live scans and both passed. Safety is important of course, but preference is suppose to be given EACH time the child is moved or placed.
In CA relatives are described as Grandparent, aunt,uncle, etc. you can go to the 5th degree. We are included in the relative description, thankfully
YOU are SO right in CPS being able to use the guidelines against us if they choose. That is where NEW legislation needs to come in.
There needs to be LAW where an approved relative cannot be challenged by a foster parent, NOT EVER! I believe in adoption by fp when there is no safe, willing, able relative. The law needs to be specific, CPS has too much power to bend rules and use the family codes as both a weapon and a sword. Unfortunately for Del Norte CPS and State Adoptions, they messed with the wrong relative.
My nephew HAS a HUGE family who loves him and wants him home. AND on my side is a LOT of proof and not just by me other agency workers are very aware and in possession of proof. I know that with time and a court hearing, it will all come out. BUT we want him yesterday in our home.
Sad that some people have the God complex and put their own agendas first.
In the thread starter's case, I just wanted to prepare her for a fight. The sooner the better, I WISH we had known that before, but CPS keeps their mouths shut until it is too late.
I get so angry with them and we have sacrificed a lot to be in this fight, but really, my nephew has been the real suffering party to their evil deeds.

We are back from soccer and off to in-laws for early Thanksgiving.
My prayers are with you. My only intent was to warn you not to let the system guide you, a young baby (child under 3) is fast tracked into adoption. SAD but very very true, ask about concurrent planning too. ARE they putting the child into a pre-adoptive home? I was NEVER told that one either. These families are TRYING to adopt (no problem there either just not OK when GOOD relatives are available) and they sought a lower risk, younger boy.
Sometimes I get very mad at our broken system, we point fingers at other governments and here we have baby thieves that can fight family!
In no way are adoptive parents USUALLY baby thieves, I respect what they are doing and trying to do. BUT a foster family that would fight a SAFE & willing relative is EVIL. I apologize for being blunt but in our case, the fp have sat in court, read my adoption home evaluation, etc. There is NO way they do not know that I am a safe place for him, besides we have dealt with some lying from our fp and SW.
OK off my soap box, I am sure all fp and adoptive parents are NOT evil and in no way am I implying that here
THANKS!

[EAGLE6]

In our case, we don't even know if the FP's have been told relatives are trying to get placement of him. I know my BIL finally got his 1st supervised visit this last week. That took almost 3 weeks to be set up by the CW's. It just seems like the whole process is going a lot slower than what they stated it would be.

I did actually get an additional release form to fill out on Friday, so it does appear they are at least looking at our paperwork. I'm going to make more calls Monday & Tuesday. The CW's are now telling us we have to wait until the 12/15 hearing to see what the judge decides in the grandparents hearing. I'm trying to place nice and trying to decide if I should sit tight until 12/15 or continue to take it further now.

If they were to guarantee me that they'd start transitioning him after the 12/15 hearing (if grandparents are denied) then I'd play along. However, gut instinct tells me, they'll find another excuse then.

Would you sit and wait, or continue to raise kane now?

[mom2fabtwins]

i'm usually not one to "tempt fate", but in this case I would keep pushing. I would make the daily calls to all parties and make sure they know you are not going away. Even if it is a call to "just check in", see how he is doing.
I would think he would have a doctor appointment coming up to check the progress of the femur fractures (if you can check to see if the fractures are close to the growth plate).
I will say an extra prayer!

[hkolln]

I wouldn't sit and wait...the CW may think you changed your mind. Let her know you are just checking to see how he's doing and that you are still requesting placement. That way they can't use the timeframe you didn't contact against you!

[Hadley2]

Just another word of caution...you mention your BIL's delay on a visit as if it were a bad thing. Fight the baby's battle, not his. Two legs were broken. If you seem to be concerned about the BIL or mother, or too chummy with them, you only cast doubt on yourself. Two legs were broken. If I were the cw, I would be in NO hurry to subject that baby to a vist by either parent. Don't talk about the parents to the cw, good or bad. They are not your concern and if they appear to be, a good cw will drag her feet not only placement with you but perhaps visitation as well. This may be a part of the problem--two legs were broken, multiple family members were around this child, etc., and right now, fair or not, you may be viewed as one of the clan this happened in. You need to be and act like social service's ally, not the parents'. Your allegiance is to the baby and his safety, not to them in any way. I'm not saying this to be harsh, it is the reality.

Also, the parents in our case were very rarely a reliable source of information on anything, anyway. Use whatever tidbits you hear from them as leads you need to check, no more. ETA: They have little to no power in this situation, either. Don't waste time trying to hatch any plans with them or make any deals with them. It only makes you look as if you are in league with them and would probably work against you.

Please do keep moving and do something real and constructive as quickly as possible--Push them with the legal requirements to at least do the homestudy and whatever else will be needed they were supposed to do within 24 hours of removal this week so that you will be approved and ready when the word comes. Call up the chain! Get an attorney to write the agency director (not the cw) a letter saying they have to do what is needed to approve you within 24 hours--may cost you $100, but worth it. The cw is not going to help you right now. Be friendly, tell her you understand she is doing what she thinks best, you both want the child to be safe and in the best placement, and you are doing what you need to do to see that happen as quickly as possible.

If the mother is living with the grandmother, I don't see that there is a snowball's chance that grandmother will get placement unless social services decides to take a powder on what they know. If that happens, then the real stink will begin.

good luck this week, I hope there is some change in the child's favor.

[hkolln]

I agree with Hadley. Make it an issue of your desire to protect this child from future abuse. Make sure they understand you do not accept the fact this child may go back to someone that allegedly abused him. We were very stern in the fact that we were here to protect Alexis from future harm by her mother and father. We were not relatives that wanted her to be in harms way like some of the other relatives. Our motivation for her entire case was to keep her safe from harm. I'm glad we did because now biomom (my SIL) is writing to biodad in prison about where Alexis is and that scares me. She should keep her mouth shut and protect her however hasn't followed that. She is not a safe person for Alexis to be living with and I'm so happy she's here where she's safe and secure and nobody will EVER hurt her again!! They have to go thru me and my husband!

The fact is the case is about the child's safety and you wish to keep him safe. Children deserve for us to protect them and keep them safe, not hurt them. When the parents make the wrong choices the kids get hurt and that shouldn't continue. If you fight then fight for the child's safety.

[EAGLE6]

We actually have not had very much contact w/ my BIL or his girlfriend, what we know we know from my MIL. We have never talked to the CW about BIL or his girlfriend.

I appreciate the opinions, and I will continue making myself somewhat a thorn until they at least investigate our home.

[Boulderbabe]

Originally Posted by cantbuymeluv

In no way are adoptive parents USUALLY baby thieves, I respect what they are doing and trying to do. BUT a foster family that would fight a SAFE & willing relative is EVIL.

There are lots of different situations out there. Not all of them are identical to yours. And there are lots and lots of reasons why it might be better for a child to stay with a foster family rather than being sent to a relative.

Please don't overstate your case, and watch your words. I found your post really offensive, and hurtful, too. There's really no need to go there.