[ALfostermom]

was just wondering what your counties do for foster children at christmas? Our county DHR finds Sponsors from the community that actually buy "Santa Gifts" for the kids to open Christmas morning. They try to make it even , but it never ends up that way. They ask the foster children to make a wish list to give to "santa" and the sponsor is asked to spend $150-$200 on each individual child. The problem we have had with this is the older kids never get clothes they like or fit right; we all know how picky teenagers are with clothes these days. and unless it is bought at alocal store we can't get a return. Don't get me wrong we are all extremely grateful, just trying to come up with an easier/ fairer way. Last year, i had two kids in my home one ended up with everything on their list ( about $300.00 worth ) and the other had nothing they asked for and maybe only $100.00 worth and trust me they would have known the difference. So after finally getting there stuff 5 days before christmas i had to go do additional shopping to make it fair, on top of what i had already bought them. ( sorry just needed to vent on that one)...Sorry i made ti so long.... So what does your county do?

[naca]

Ha.. Our county does absolutely nothing.. at least our foster kids have never received anything extra & we've fostered with them for over 3 1/2yrs. We just buy for them ourselves like the rest of our kids.

[Mystik]

I don't really know if our County is supposed to do anything, but the girls got nothing from the County last Christmas. Our FFA however had this angel tree type deal where people donate a gift worth $20 or less for a particular age group and gender. One of the girls was given something completely age inappropriate and the other was given nothing. Thank God they were too young to care. I also remember being in a foster group home when I was 15. It was in Canada and I guess the foster parents were given around $100 or more per kid to spend on Christmas. Most of the kids were given the cash which to a 15 year old is awesome. I however was given an ugly purple coat, lol. I'm sure it works out wonderfully most of the time and the thought behind it is what really matters. I personally just haven't had the best experience with the foster care "Santa"

[greenrobin]

Our agency was approached a few years ago by an investment firm about hosting a Christmas party with Santa and presents and about a ton of food. All of the kids in the home--bio and foster--made out a list. My bio son's gift didn't work out right, but Bubba and Sissy got really cool presents.

We got something like $100 each for shopping for Bubba and Sissy. I don't remember where it came from, though I've slept since then!

[mommy2fiveplus]

Our agency (private agency contracted by DHS to provide foster care) gives the foster parents $35 for each kid for x-mas and birthday presents, but they also were approached by private sponsers who bought for the kids, usually unequally because the little kids get tons and after they are teens it is harder to shop for them. My 3 mos old foster son at the time recieved almost $100 in clothes and toys while a friends 14 year-old got two shirts and some school supplies and a CD.

My mom's teens however were given over $300 of gifts each from private sponsers and the radio station. I forget who got their name but they did an awesome job picking out things that teen boys would love.

[vegaschristina]

My kids got a few things from Toys for Tots. We would have gotten more, but I refuse to go to the Toys for Tots party. It's just too depressing and hard on me to see all of these kids. I'd rather just use my own money and get them anything they want (within reason).

[twinflana]

When I was still fostering the private agencies would get gift donations that were marked with gender and age. The caseworkers were responsible for bringing out the items. Was great if the child had been with you for awhile but if you had a new placement even 30 days old that child wouldnt get much and it might not be correct sizes.

The GAL's would ask in October what the child needed or wanted. Well when you have an infant the size they wear in October might not be the size they wear in Dec/Jan. Again if you had a newer placement they might get nothing.

Our first year I received 2 siblings 3 days before christmas. I asked DCF if they had any christmas gifts. Was told yes but they forgot to bring them. Asked again 2 days before christmas and was told they were locked up in the office since it was a weekend. I had to go christmas shopping 2 days before christmas so that the children had something. It wasnt that I minded buying gifts but all of our money really had been spent already and all the toys were very picked over at the store. The next year I learned to be prepared and bought extra gifts just in case and wouldnt you know it no new placements for 2 weeks before christmas.

[ALfostermom]

thank you everyone for you quick responses. I knew that our county went above and beyond what they had to do. Like I said we are very appreciative, just trying to see if there are better ideas for handeling this. Not only is it unfair , but dhr works really hard teh whole month of dec trying to make it right. When they are working so hard on Christmas it is hard to get ahold of them for regular case stuff. thank you to everyone again and anyone else have ideas or what your county does?

[afamilythroughfoster]

our county doesn't do anything extra for each child. But one year, our fs was chosen as the social workers "secret santa". I was sooo touched they chose him. They brought him about 200.00 worth of nice gifts. It really touched my heart.

[mommytoEli]

i worked with 2 counties and neither one of them did anything for any of the kids i had through 2 christmases. instead of running out and buying additional items to make things fair, is it possible to hold some items back to make things fair? i mean, if you've gotten them stuff already, then the things coming from county are like a bonus right? if it was possible, i'd just set the things aside for a short while and worry about making things fair AFTER Christmas when life is not crazy.

[minibus]

I worked in therapeutic foster care for several years and each Christmas, DSHS would ask the kids for a wish list. But then it was up to the individual worker to distribute the gifts when they arrived. This happened very unevenly. Some kids would get tons of gifts, and in at least one case that I knew of, one worker called the family on Christmas eve to say he was coming by to bring the child's gifts ... and then never bothered to show up!

We also got gifts for the kids through our agency. We would often redistribute them so they were more even between the kids.

[kxl164]

Our county throws a very nice party every year, with Santa and small gifts and music and food. It is fun for everyone usually.

They also have a special program where businesses and community member can donate money for foster and needy children for Christmas. The foster children are each given a check (well the foster parents get the check) to help supplement our Christmas shopping for the children. I think they way they do it here is wonderful, you get a little extra help to buy things the children need/want/fit....

Each year the amount of money differs due to funds available, but we were so surprised by it and grateful that our county and community think of our children in this way.

BTW, they switched to this method because they thought it would be better to just give money than gifts because each child is so different and either the foster parent could buy special toys/clothes/gifts, or, as in the case of many older teens, they could just be given the cash (or given a gift card for that amount) to get what they wanted.

[millie58]

DSS has a "holiday" party and the kids get a gift. I've heard that DSS has money for the kids to buy gifts for their family members but I havent' seen anything. I use my own.

[RobinKay]

Originally Posted by kxl164

Our county throws a very nice party every year, with Santa and small gifts and music and food. It is fun for everyone usually.

They also have a special program where businesses and community member can donate money for foster and needy children for Christmas. The foster children are each given a check (well the foster parents get the check) to help supplement our Christmas shopping for the children. I think they way they do it here is wonderful, you get a little extra help to buy things the children need/want/fit....

Each year the amount of money differs due to funds available, but we were so surprised by it and grateful that our county and community think of our children in this way.

BTW, they switched to this method because they thought it would be better to just give money than gifts because each child is so different and either the foster parent could buy special toys/clothes/gifts, or, as in the case of many older teens, they could just be given the cash (or given a gift card for that amount) to get what they wanted.

That is such an excellent system.

[marigold]

There are many private groups (churches, colleges, etc) who do great things for foster children around the holidays. However I thought it almost laughable that I recieve $10 extra per child in my DCFS subsidy. That sure buys alot!