[GRGFOR2]

I have never been a foster parent but joined this group because I would like to be one. I adopted two brothers but it was a private adoption so even then I was not fostering the boys.

I have no concern about being able to pass all the home studies and foster care licensing needs. My concern is more about whether it would be fair to the children, both my own and any children that I might foster.

Both my boys have mental health needs that are being treated and one of the boys has Asperger's Syndrome. I am a single parent.

Do any of you have special needs children of your own and if so .... does it work out okay when foster children are introduced into the family.

I care about CHILDREN and felt that I would be a great foster parent since I am a SAHM. I am just unsure whether to get the ball rolling on it if it would harm in any way my children or children I might foster.

Opinions appreciated............Lynn

[ranoutofnames]

One thing you'll hear most of us say is how every family is different and you need to evaluate your family's strengths and weaknesses.

Both of my daughter's have special needs, and the child I'm about to give birth to has at least one birth defect. In evaluating my family we plan to continue fostering but the children I accept now are different than the children I had 8yrs ago. I may have the SKILLS to manage certain behaviors or issues but I no longer have the same time or energy to commit to certain behaviors. In addition, certain children's behaviors exaccerbate my daughters or other long-term foster childrens behavior so I don't accept placement of those children.

I think one thing to consider is how you feel at the end of the day. Some of the questions I've asked people who approach me are:
If you spend more days thinking "I'm so tired and worn out I am not looking forward to tomorrow" then being a foster parent is likely not a good fit for you.
If going to the grocery store with the two children you have right now can be an exhausting experience then being a fp is likely not a good fit for you.

There are lots of ways to help children in need so if foster parenting turns out not to be the right fit for you and your family then I would hope you would consider another way to be of service.

... never one to scare away a prospective new foster parent (especially if you're in my area), just wanting to honestly state that it sounds like your hands are kinda full right now and you are questioning for yourself if taking on another challenge would be a good idea. Being a foster parent is likely the toughest thing I've ever done.