[one-lucky-mom]

Whew, today has been a long day already... so forgive me for blabbing too much.

CW came by earlier for a required monthly in-home visit. I always like them -- really informal and gives me a chance to catch her up on what my FD is doing (she had delays but is learning more everyday!), etc. Her CW is very nice & approachable and if anything, I drive her crazy with questions.

Then CASA worker called to follow-up and see how FD is doing so she can have a report ready to submit to the courts. The worker is nice but very cut & dry. I answered her questioned the best I could but hung the phone up wondering if I should have elaborated more or did I say too much... ugh, I hate that.

After our last placement left I felt like I had been too quiet and didn't speak up enough... it was all new to me and I wasn't sure when to speak up.

Fast forward to now -- Our FD (our 2nd placement) was physically abused by one of her parents (cops didn't charge either so far... they're both blaming the other one). I try to stay neutral and supportive of both -- but the momma bear in me just wants to protect FD from more pain. I struggle with this.

So... all that for this question -- how do you best advocate for your foster children to the caseworkers; courts; CASA; etc, without feeling like you're overdoing it? or not saying enough?? Sometimes I feel like they want my opinion -- but then sometimes it seems like I'm saying too much or they just don't want to know.

[nurse mama]

I have really been wondering the same thing this week. I am not that experienced either, so maybe some other foster parents can shed some light on the subject.

[ca-bigsister]

With the exception of many CASAs, few people advocate for our kids. It's too easy for them to be a number so I don't worry about doing too much or asking for too much. I hardly ever get anything anyway. If I waited for it to come by my FD, I would get nothing.

[MassachusettsMom]

I don't think you should ever feel bad about advocating for your foster child. You might be the only one who is.

[casey03]

Honestly, I sometimes feel that my husband and I are the only advocates that our kids have. That is our "job" to love and protect, which means being a voice when they are not heard.

[Withay]

Think of it this way - if you don't ask, your fc probably won't get it. Ask, ask, ask.

I email everyone about each new development with fc - each new tooth, first pull to stand, crawling, sleeping through night, how they react to visits, dr appts, etc.

You are the one who knows this child and the cw, CASA, atty, etc need you to let them know everything so they can properly tell the courts what is going on with the child.