[Sissy22]

Has anyone ever fostered a teenager and their child ?
We've met them both already and they fit right in to our home ! They'll hopefully be moving in soon ! Also wondering if anyone has ever had experiance letting foster child get a learner's permit? We're thinking about that if everything goes well. I don't think I've ever seen a post about mom/baby placements though. So I 'm guessing it doesn't happen alot.

[stevenstwin]

Not me - but I have a friend who is doing that. She took in the girl when she was a pregnant 15 year old, and has since adopted with her. She is now 18 and working full time but still living with my friend, and my friend is helping her parent her 3 year old daughter. She enjoys it! And for the learner's permit - yes, my son is working on that right now. Children's Services is paying for him to take driver training as soon as he gets his permit, and I'll be letting him practice on my car.

[Sissy22]

Thank you so much ! This is one young lady who deserves a break in spite of what life has thrown at her she's a sweetheart and an awesome mom ! can't wait til they're here.

[stevenstwin]

It sounds like it will be really positive for you - not a lot of foster parents are willing to take this on, so kudos to you! One bizarre side note on my friend, though - as soon as the mom turned 18, DFS cut off ALL support for both the mom AND the baby. Since the mom has little education and is struggling with a minimum wage job, that means that my friend is at least partially supporting both mother and baby. They asked for help and you won't BELIEVE what DFS told them - that the only way to get funding was for the mom to move out - she'd then "fail" as a mother becuase she wouldn't be able to adequately provide for her baby, and then they'd TAKE the baby and give her back to my friend. ??? Talk about setting a young mom up to fail rather than succeed!!

[Sissy22]

We're really not sure what will happen in April when she turns 18 we're trying to get her placed and settled in 1st but even if the're only here 6 months. any advice, parenting tips, or anything else we give her would last forever. There needs to be help out there for 18 year olds that age out but that's a whole other topic.

[janf]

can I ask why dfs is noy helping them settle into adult hood. no programs to help them get into college or a housing program. I know in Oregon that is what they do. I think they start at 17 and help them adjust to moving out. help me if I am wrong on this

jan

[Sissy22]

You can ask but I'm still pretty new at this .Our agecy has an Independent living program and a scholarship program that we are going to find out about however if she would quit school and move out at 18 we can't stop her. I'll let you know if we find out more about the programs.

[coopspa]

JanF-

Same here in CA. There is transitional help: aptartment, job skills/hunting, money for school. Most states do, sadly not all.

[locoenlacabeza]

Here when a child ages out of the system they can actually voluntarily resign themselves back in as foster kids and the state will take care of them until they are 21 if they are going to school etc...For the ones that choose to age out, they do help with transitioning, and a bit of money but thats pretty much as far as it goes.


I would love to foster teen girls, especially pg or mom/child ones, its just not something I can do right now with my own kids being so young. I also think that I probably shouldn't foster someone who I was too young to give birth to. I think they may not see me as a parent. But its definitely on my to do list!! Actually because I was a teen parent is one of the biggest reasons I have always wanted to foster teen girls!

[shycar]

I also would love to take a teenager with a child or pg. But like previouse post i dont feel ready yet. But I am looking foward for down the road. I have a friend she is in the same agency as I am. She took in a 15 yr old girl and her 2 day old daughter. After 6 months the 15 yr old ran away and left her baby with my friend. My friend still after 3 years does not know where this girl went, but she did get to adopt the baby. It was both sad and a good ending to the story.

[straightblues]

This sounds like a big challenge to me. Parenting a parent even if she is a young parent has got to hard. Please report back as this thing progesses. I would love to see how the dynamics are going to work out.

[momof2redheads]

I just recieved a mom (18) her daughter 2 and her son 4months. They came on Friday. I can say so far so good! We took them in as a temporary placement but it might just become long term. She is still going to school and the state still provides for her. I have to say she is a good mom. I feel blessed just by having them in my house. The mom says she knows she made mistakes but really wants to provide for her kids. She does everything for them. I don't even hear them when they wake up in the middle of the night. It is nice to have little ones around again. (not that mine are grown and old but it is nice to have a baby in the house again)

[shy_bear]

My hubby I and I were just talking about this the other day. My girls are too young right now, but when they are much older this is something I would love to do. It is wonderful that you are helping out these young moms!!!

[Bug-n-Bears-Mommy]

Our youngest was placed with his then 14 year old mother. They were transitioning her into a home for teen mothers when she decided it was NOT for her. That is when Bear came to live with us. His mother chose to have him placed in our care as an adoptive home.

[coopspa]

Can you imagine how many less children would come into foster care if more people would take the time and effort to teach these foster care "baby mamas" how to parent and to survive in the real world? We hear all the time about 2nd and 3rd generation fosters because no one gives them the tools to make better choices. I think back to my 18-21 yrs, and my years as a first time mom, and I was on the phone with my own mom 3 times a day . And that was after I spent 18 yrs in a "normal" growing up situation (ie: someone taught me how to cook, clean, balance a checkbook, change a diaper ). I can't imagine trying to navigate that on my own.

I think that it is amazing that so many of you want to step into that role .