[lakin11]

Okay I just need to vent and this is my 2nd home, so here I am! Little background...I babysit for my niece everyday (she's 2). Up until Tuesday I also had my 9 1/2 yr old nephew here during summer break. I've been watching her for almost a year (end of Aug).
Well.....today, my SIL came and I apparently didn't hear the door bell. I was either in the laundry room or back in my bedroom folding clothes. Well instead of calling my phone to let me know she was here, she left and took niece to old daycare (who still watches her when we have court, etc).
Now....I cannot even begin to tell you how mad I am about this. She didn't call me, she calls her husband, my BIL, who in turn calls his brother, my husband! My DH was like what happened? I told him I don't know, if she rang the bell or knocked I didn't hear it at all. Apparently she's mad at me b/c we couldn't find my niece's shoe yesterday (kid drags them all over the house).
My SIL drives me nuts anyway....she's NEVER here until 6 or later to pick up the kids...she'll not call to let me know it will be late. One week she showed up at 7....everyday...without telling me that she had to be at work early (she's normally here at 8). If my nephew has a 1/2 day at school, she never lets me know. I had to get a copy of the school calendar to know b/c she never told me. If we'd been to the museum or something he would have been sitting here waiting. She or my BIL is always calling, can you watch the kids till 7 or 8....so I say yeah, sure.....at 10 or 11 they pick them up. The other night, she called to see if niece could stay till 7-7:30 so they could go to dinner w/ some VIP's at BIL's job. I said sure....at 9:30 she picks her up. We asked if they could watch our girls (so only 2 of the 4 kids) on Sunday for a few hours and they said no.
I'm still venting sorry! My niece is 2+ and at my house is potty trained.....she can do the whole thing by herself and barely needs help getting the clothes back on...very independent. At home she is always in diapers!!!! On the weekend if we go over there, they never let her go potty...tell her "No, you have on a diaper, you don't need to go potty". This infuriates me. My SIL expects niece to have it down perfect and tell her every time she needs to go and never have an accident. I tell my niece to go potty, she doesn't tell me. I've tried to explain to her she doesn't really know everytime and that she (SIL) just needs to sit her down on the potty and she'll go!
On top of this my nephew is a little terror......he doesn't listen, very rude and disrespectful. She doesn't do anything about it. Last time he was over the top rude, I took away his Nintendo DS and kept it at my house...I knew if it went home, he'd be playing it in the car there. There is no consitency in that house and he's turning out to be a nightmare....I dread to see him hit teen years!
So I feel we go out of our way to accomodate them and this is like a slap in the face. I told my husband the next time they ask if they can stay late I'm saying no. I am done bending over backwards for them. I've put up with their bratty son (who is such a negative influence on my 3 fkids), her inconsideration of my time, etc. I'm over it. If she's mad and wants to pull my niece, I'll find the extra $ some other way. Good luck if she thinks the old daycare will put up with it. I'd be a rich woman if I charged her for the late fees like the other daycare lady will do! I just hate being taken advantage of. I've put up with it this long b/c I love my niece and nephew and hoped our influence here would help them grow into better kids. My husband has felt we "owed" them b/c we'd borrowed money from his brother before when money was tight. I think we've "paid" our debt to them.
Sorry to bore you all, I just needed a place to gripe!
Shannon

[yanknrebel]

SHannon,

VENT ON!!!!! I have BEEN THERE!!!! Yes, you are right. The daycare WOULD NOT put up with it for too long. Even if they are making extra money every day off of her late fees. People want to KNOW when they are off work. No one likes being taken advantage of.What was her reasoning for not watching your kids? DId she have one? I would NOT feel bad about telling her no from now on. Apparently she does not appreciate you for what you have done for her or her children. There are always mothers looking for quality babysitting and daycare for their kids. Good luck and don't be a doormat.

Mary
yanknrebel

[twinflana]

I dont really think I would have put up with this as long as you have. When you give a inch they will take a mile. She probably will not ever get better. Maybe you should sit her down say these are the rules and there will be no exceptions if you cant abide by the rules then look elsewhere. I know it is harsh but your piece of mind should come first.

[lakin11]

TODAY she brings her sick! She threw up this morning apparently. Hello I have 4 other kids here! She's in my room asleep since she got here. I'll do my best to limit her exposure to the other kids. We were at church and lunch with them yesterday so I'm sure if she's contagious she's already passed it along to them, but still! Again, no daycare would allow her to come sick.
Just frustrated! My MIL was mad too when she heard what she did. DH doesn't know what happened between MIL and SIL, but he thinks there is something going on. I know my MIL does not approve of a lot of what my SIL/BIL are doing as far as raising their kids, but she's a wonderful woman and I don't see her interferring. Things are a little better with my nephew since he's only here an hour or so now after school. He still has an attitude though. Thanks for your thoughts ladies. I just was furious the other day....still not happy today, but not quite as mad haha. Love to be able to come here and vent!
Shannon

[Lamaena]

Good luck and remember your sanity and overall wellbeing are worth a lot mmore than what your SIL and BIL are paying you. It's sad that your niece and nephew wouldn't be taught the values they'll surely need if it wasn't for you!

Hugs and Kisses!
Mimi