[swanzie]

Now that I have fostered for over a year – I just wanted to thank each an every one of you for listening, laughing, crying and praying with me.

Everyday a lot of us come to this forum and learn so much about fostering kids, more than they could even put into a training program. We learn about the heartbreak of others walking down the same path we have chosen. Sometimes we lean on others for help, other times we tell our story to try and help those who are in need. We are in a way like a family. We are here for each other, no matter what – we try not to judge, but to support. We ask questions and give advice.

Just for being there with your kind words and stories has changed my attitude on numerous days and has made me a stronger foster parent, and advocate for these children. I used to think that I was the one who must be crazy!!…and reached out to find others had those same problems. I used to take the backseat and let others dictate what was right for the kids placed in my house. – You all have given me the courage and strength to (request/insist) to get the best help and services…this has changed the life of the children with whom currently reside in my house.(so much so you will never know!)

I quit my job to take care of these children full-time. I have been blessed with many (anonymous) new friends. I have a foster friendly family!! I love all of you for who you are and what you are doing. I appreciate this forum and all its participants and I think it is the best place for 24/7 support available for any foster parent. Foster parenting is especially difficult we have a non-traditional role – we have unique parenting problems to say the least. People who have never done this job can only sympathize with us, but it is truly all of you who give me support and help and just being there to “hold our hand” thru some trying times. For this I am extremely grateful.

There are so many of you that have been here for awhile and know what I am getting at. For those of you who are new to all of this welcome and hopefully now I can give you some of my insight (LOL). I miss some of those who are no longer with us like gregorysparents…as she was definitely a big influence in my decision to keep fostering, her words of wisdom, friendship and encouragement have been a significant part of my parenting.

How has this forum helped you?

[hubbyswife]

For me personally, I think it's more for me that other people are actually going thru what we are and that makes us feel less alone...even tho people here are states away... where our families and friends are fertile and have children so we really can't talk to them b/c they have no clue what's it's like.... and knowing that other ppl get the stoopid remarks about foster care..... and how to handle those when u have heard the same comment for the upteenth time... u just want to say enough is enough....

Another thing this forum has done for me is that it gives me ideas for my foster kids.... I mean what to expect at different stages during the whole legal process of adopting, how I can do things better, behavior mgt ideas, etc....

We've been fparents for almost 2yrs now but I still don't feel like an expert.... or even close.... but one thing I do say to new ppl is Don't be afraid to say no to placements or be stern w the sw..... b/c if u give them an inch they take a foot.....

[twinflana]

I have met 3 local foster families thru this forum. They have been great supporting me since I am a new foster parent.

[AmyAnne]

It's nice to have the validation. That I'm not crazy. That I AM doing the right thing in the way I discipline my child despite what the parents of birth children that I know say. That someone ELSE is going through or has gone through my same journey and we can help each other over the obstacles.

[tinatyme]

It is always nice to belong to a community. I wish that foster parenting and foster children had a better image/connotation in our society. It has been such a positive experience that has totally transformed my life.

I have become something of an anomaly among my friends and family and I think some of them paint this picture about my life and foster parenting in general. It is gratifiying because it is generally positive, but it is hard for me because then I have no one to talk to about the challenges, the waiting, the frustrations, the loss, etc.

I'm so glad that I found this community.

Foster/Adopt Parent since 2004
Foster Mom (soon to be Adoptive Mom) to:
FD - D (22 months old)
Placed 11/18/04 (at 5 weeks old)
TPR granted 06/16/06
Waiting for Adoption date (hopefully soon)

Foster Mom (soon to be Adoptive Mom) to:
FS - J (2 years old)
Placed 06/30/06 (at 14 months old)
Waiting for TPR date

Foster Mom to:
FS - W (6 months old)
Placed 08/04/06 (New baby!)
Plan: Reunification