[roomformore]

Our foster kids caseworker just said things went well for the kids parents at the court before the judge and judge said he would leave it up to the discretion of the caseworker when kids go home. Instead she decided to start 3 hour unsupervised visits once or twice a week. She also mentioned may do overnights. My question is: How long before our foster kids go home? Just an estimate based on others experience.

[mrstkg1]

Probably pretty fast. Once the judge gives the green light, I'm sure the CW will move fairly rapidly, especially since they will probably be getting pressure from the bfamily. In situations like this, I usually tell the SW that we will waive any notice so the kids can get home sooner. It also makes you look like a hero in the eyes of the bfamily in case you are hoping to stay in touch after the kids go home.

However, based on your situation, you make decide that a longer transition would be more appropriate and you could ask the caseworker to draw it out for a couple of weeks, but that is probably as long as they will draw it out.

Best wishes,

Jami

[roomformore]

I personally dont think these children should be going home yet. Their parents have not completed their anger management and parenting classes yet. The Mom also just lost her job two weeks ago-she got fired for non compliance. And they are moving shortly according to the caseworker. I mean how unstable do they sound? And the Grandma told me they still were asking to borrow money-add three kids to that................kids were removed due to abuse and neglect.

[MBelt8402]

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. The judge must see it differently. Good luck to them ands to you.

[mrstkg1]

I don't understand why a judge would approve under those circumstances, that just doesn't make sense. I would think that a slow transition would be better, but sometimes things are just plain wacky.

[roomformore]

Well we had the three hour visit today and now the worker wants us to do another three hour visit later this same week-friday or sat. The parents are moving friday so that would be inconvenient for them I would think. We live 30 miles away and it is not convenient to do it again this week. Our worker is not very nice to us anyways-pretty unsuportive. I think we will have to make some excuse. The caseworker did say they would probably do a slow transition to see if the parents can maintain their house(probably means without being evicted). The parents were nice enough to suggest we do an all day visit once a week to save me from driving two separate days in one week. The overnight visits will come soon too I guess. I agree I dont know what the judge was thinking sending them home under the circumstances but the parents put a good face on and can be convincing and then later you find out all this bad stuff that has been going on...............I guess it is just hard for me to believe abusers change so very quickly anger management classes or no.

[lakin11]

Makes you wonder if the CW is telling the judge all thats going on?! I know in our case, I think there is stuff that she should say and she never mentions it! I'm still surprised at how little is actually done at court so far! Granted bios haven't been there, so they really don't have much to say. We go on the 16th for bdad....supposed to be a fact finding hearing WITH the translator actually there.
Hope in your case they drag it out long enough for the judge to see things aren't all well and good w/ the bios!
Shannon

[bumpkin]

HI

I can't really speak from experience. The only one I had go home we were initially told it would take 3 or 4 months for the visits to be drawn out and as it went, it was less than a month.

I will tell you something that our cw todl us, that sometimes they can try the visitation and increase the visits quickly in order to see how the family will handle the children being back. I mean, who couldn't deal with 1 visit for 3 hours a week???? many days (and nights) in a row, may be another story. Kind of sink or swim. you know?? just a thought - better for them to fail during visits than after RU.

((((hugs))) it is so hard.

[locoenlacabeza]

I agree with Bumpkin. Many things can happen during these visits. How old are the kids? How are their behaviors after the visits? Have they changed since going from supervised to unsupervised? Keep track of these things and if you notice a difference bring it to CW attention. If CW doesn't help, talk to GAL or therapist or CW supervisor.

[roomformore]

We just started the three hour visits this week but our worker wants another visit Friday or Sat. and the parents are moving friday. How stupid is that? It is like the caseworker just doesnt use her head. I mean everyone knows how disorganized and crazy things are when you are moving. Why not wait until after the weekend for them to get settled? I dont know. Their behavior after a visit is pretty much what I have heard from other foster parents. Grumpyier and do not want to mind. They are 2 1/2 and 1 1/2 years old though too so at this age that is kind of the norm. They never had boundaries before and now they do. They were left to fend for themselves mostly with the help of a 9 year old half sibling. So sad.

[bumpkin]

roomforone.... maybe they want them to be with them during the chaos??

hang in.