[ally123]

here we go again!! Our 6 month old fs just did 2 overnights with bmom. She called dhs today and once again is complaining and complaining about us. It is so frustrating. The hard part this week is that the cw is gone for the week so the complaints go to a different worker who then must follow up on them (this worker was very nice and apologetic that she even had to go over these with me). One of the ironic things about this is that bmom is making herself look bad along with us. She is complaining that he didn't have a coat on- he has always been transported in carseats with blankets and the carseat cover- I don't leave the cover at daycare when he is going on overnight visits because bmom supplies her own- I do leave blankets. This time she somehow talked a new in-home worker into picking up the baby and dropping off the baby at daycare so there was no cover for the seat and bmom freaked- she then sent him back the same way (if she was so concerned shouldn't she have put a coat on him - I would have if I new he wasn't going to have a carseat cover.) She has also transported him back after visits without anything over him- but that is different I guess?!?!? Then she complains about him being dirty and says we have a dirty house (that she has NEVER seen) so now sw has to make a visit to our house today- I don't care it is just frustrating. She also complained about the flat spot on the back of his head saying we let him lay on his back all the time and that we are treating him different because he is bi-racial. I guess she seemed to be caught up in the bi-racial thing recently which is riduculous to me- he is a baby, a child who just needs love and attention- what does it matter if he is bi-racial or not!! She has refused to let our area education agency come in and work with her to discuss the flatness on his head and his weak neck muscles (I have met with them twice already- through dhs) if she was so concerned she should try to help him!!!

Sorry for going on and on- I just really really needed to vent and I am so glad I found my way here. I appreciate all the help I get. Dh just tells me to let it go and not let it bother me so much but that is hard.

I just can't wait to leave here (I'm at work- working really hard!!) so I can go pick up M and just hug him and play with him and let the rest of this be forgotten until the next visit when I am sure there will be new complaints!!!!!

[hubbyswife]

Huggggsss to you!

[Forever_family]

Wanted to say that you are doing a wonderful thing for this baby and you are doing exactly what needs to be done for him in the most formative years of his life. Whether the birth mother knows it or not you are also doing a great service to her. You are not the reason or the one who made the decision to remove her baby. Her actions caused this situation. YOU are nurturing her baby for her. What would happen to him if he really was in a bad foster home or left with the birth mom? Thank you for doing what you do even if the birth mom is not able to!

My latest placement the parents accused me of everything under the sun. Parents met me for all of 2 minutes. Saw the kids for one visit and it was 2 days after placement. Almost everything they accused me of doing to the kids happened and was documented before they entered my home, they claimed the SW's were lying. They were emergency and were only with me for a week yet I think there were around 20 accuisations made against me! It was so frustrating and really petty, some of it made up, stupid things. Thankfully the SW knew the parents and did not worry about it. However, they did have to ask me about most of what was said against me which was VERY frustrating considering the things the BP did to the children. I was super paranoid that something would happen, even a scratch and they would have flipped. I had to relax and I tried to do what you are doing. Look at the kids and know they are worth it and they need you. You aren't alone in this!

L

[brl]

Hang in there and remember the sw knows who is on the up and up and who is not!

She can complian all she wants if there is no smoke, there can be no fire on your part. She can alledge all day long, but proof is what she will not have.

the bi-racial remark is humerous. If you were a racist why would you waste your time caring for her bi-racial child. I don't understand people sometime!!!

[ally123]

she sent him back DIRTY!! He has crusty stuff and snarls in his hair and sticky stuff in his ear. I had daycare document it for me - just in case!

On a happy note- he was soooo glad to see me today. He laughed and sucked on my face for the first 5 minutes!

[Kate1129]

I hear ya!


DOCUMENT!! Make sure it's shown that he is not clean. For us that's been a big thing!

The accusations are a huge pain, but they happen all the time!