[dolly2]

My husband and I have been foster parents for 2 years, we have no children together, I have 2 biodaughters and he has 1 and we have 3 fos children. He no longer wants to do this anymore and we have decided to seperate and get a divorce, I would like to keep my foster children that I currently have and move to another town close to my mom who is my respite provider and would be helping me with all my children while I go back to work part-time as an LVN. I have not talked to my agency in Texas yet and I was wondering if anyone out there knows how this would work how I would approach it with them, the girls are ages 10 and 15 and want to stay with me and my girls the other is a 5 wk old baby boy who will be going to his bio dad if paternity test is positive. He was a preemie and drug addicted. I dont want to give up on any of them I just dont know if there are any certain rules on this. Any body have any ideas or ever been through this before?

[oldenough]

Dolly 2

I don't really know what will happen in terms of your foster children. I just wanted to say that I'm really sorry you're going through this. I hope you get the answers you want.

I also hope for you to have peace. I hope that doesn't sound too corny, but I know it's not an easy thing to be going through.

[gregorysparents]

dolly2,

I am sorry that your family is going thru this.

I have a friend that was married a few years ago. He and his wife became foster parents. About two months after they received a sibling set of two (they had known these kids for many many months) the wife decided that it was too much for her. She told her husband that if she got pregnant again (she had lost several) that he would have to let these two kids go. She basically said that it was "them (the kids) or me". My friend said "OK, these kids have already lost enough and have had their life screwed up - I am not giving up on them." He then took the kids to his mother's for the night.

Long story short, the husband and wife never lived in the same house again. My friend and the kids stayed with his mother for a week or so until his wife could move out. He then moved the kids back into the house and has been "happily" divorced (if there is such a thing) for over a year now. This guy has been a divorced foster dad of a boy and girl now for over a year.

Of course, my friend contacted the caseworker asap and did everything that we was suppose to do. I don't really know what the rules are - but I just wanted to let you know that in some cases things do work out.

Good luck to you and my thoughts and prayers will be with you.

Christina

[Faith65]

My prayers and thoughts are with you.

[jackiesbooks]

In our classes, they told us that you need to contact the CW and it some cases they would redo the homestudy with the just the one parent.

[TexasJingles]

Best advice is check with your worker (not the kids').

I know if you change houses, then you have to have a new homestudy (to inspect the house).

We were told that if there were any losses (death in family, divorce, miscarriage, you name it), that it would be 12 months before they would place with you (give you time to grieve). I have no idea what would happen if you already have placements.

Since you plan on moving the children, you'll have to check.

[brl]

I do not know your situation so only you can judge this advice.

Did Fostering cause this?

Is there a chance you could slow down and see if this marriage can be saved?

Are you sure this is what you want?

Can fostering give you the satisfaction after the divorce that the marriage was giving beofre fostering.

A lot of foster parents burn out, lets say 6 years from now you decide to stop fostering, where will you emotionally be.

Don't martr a marriage on the alter of Foster care unless you are really sure about it.

Since you are set on going ahead with your plans for div. I focussed all my questions on that side of it. There is a whole other set of questions for possibly going ahead with it I realize that.


I know this is a diff. time in your life.
All I wrote is just some questions to consider. They could be way off base. If they are just trash them.


Just trying to help.

[Kate1129]

I don't know much about anything other then the moving thing.

As long as it's within the same county, you shouldn't have an issue there. You will need a new home inspection.