[gregorysparents]

Hi. Well, I am in desperate need for your help and advice. I am wanting to write a letter to the Judge that's handling Gregory's case. Our court hearing is on Monday the 19th. On this day, the Judge will tell us WHEN he goes back.

Anyway, has anyone else written a letter to a Judge? If so, what did you or what didn't you include? If you are a "writer" is it possible that I could send you a sample copy of my letter and have you look over it and give me some feedback?

I need to do this letter asap because it has to arrive at the courthouse BEFORE Monday.

Thanks in advance.

Christina

[leastofthese]

Christina,

I haven't written a letter to the judge, but have done some other persuasive, albeit factual, writing in the past. I wouldn't mind proofing what you've got. I'll pm you my email. I don't know if the link in my bio is correct.

~Lori

[numbr1dbcksfan]

I think you would have to write it then go down and file it with the case and make sure the other party gets a copy so they have time to answer anything written.

[gregorysparents]

Thanks for the info. Would you just list the facts of the case in your letter or would you make your letter from an emotional view?

I know the Judge knows the facts of the case - which he has ignored. Every recommendation that has been given to the court has stated - "Don't return the child to the birth parents home."

I don't want the letter to be completely "emotional" because I would be afraid that the Judge would just overlook it.

Ugh.....I don't like writing letters!!!

Christina

[madfostermomma]

Christina:


I wrote an 8 page letter to the judge in my angel's case. One thing she did tell my husband is that all parties must see it , so if you fax it , make sure you fax it to the Law guardian as well. In our case it was too little too late but I got everyone's attention ( I also wrote to the director of DYFS and the governor). The one thing I was told by the Child advocate's office was to write a letter to the judge after she returned to her birth mother saying that while we hoped it didn't happen, if reunifcation failed, we wanted her back with us.

Have you contacted the Child Advocate's office? They may be able to help. Especially since he's been with you so long. If you need any assitance , just PM me and I'll be glad to help.

Kelly

[TBearsAunt]

It is a good idea when dealing with courts to send them an extra copy of the letter (or whatever) and a self-addressed envelope so they can file-stamp the copy and return it to you. If the court is not too far away, or you will be there for some other reason, take the letter and the copy to the clerk's office in person and ask the clerk to file-stamp your copy of the letter so you will have it for your records. If you mail it to the court you will want to send it by certified mail.

Some courts are more lenient with non-attorneys as far as procedural things go such as requiring that copies be sent to all parties involved and that sort of thing, but you will at least want to copy all attorneys of record and indicate on your letter who you are sending the copies to and whether they are being sent by mail, delivered in person, faxed, or e-mailed.

Good luck and hope this helps.

[gregorysparents]

Thanks to everyone that responded to my thread.

Thanks to the two of you that pm'd me.

Right now, I have a rough draft of my letter. Or, should I say I have a rough draft of a letter that was mostly written by another person. (thanks!!)

I will be hand delivering this letter to the courthouse since our hearing is on Monday. The courthouse is about an hour-and-a-half away.

As for contacting CASA - they are aware of the situation. In fact, CASA's recommendations have always stated, "Don't return Gregory to his birth parents." I might add here that we have full support of the CASA director.....but.....as for the CASA vol. - we think she is speaking for the parents and NOT the child. Even though everything she has ever turned in has stated - "Don't return him." Right now, the birth parents have her totally convinced that they have found God and that they have truly changed. But.....our honest gut feeling and etc. (from what we have seen and heard) is that they have not truly changed. They have a history of finding God, changing and then taking several steps back.

Our hopes and prayers are that the birth parents have truly changed and can stay this way FOREVER. I might add here that we are VERY thankful that they have remained drug free and sober since serving their jail time (Sept. 2003 to June 2004) and they have continued with this pattern. However, they are receiving a ton of support, counseling, surprise drug tests and etc. Our concern is will they be able to continue this positive behavior once all of the help is gone.

Thanks again.

Christina

[Gryph]

Our state has some protocols for foster parents.


Consistent with the Adoption and Safe Families Act (ASFA), foster parents, pre-adoptive parents and relative caregivers may submit a letter or report to the court, whether or not that person plans to attend the review hearing. Written comments should be filed with the court at least fourteen (14) days in advance of the hearing. Upon receipt of such information, the court should determine who will be responsible for mailing the letter or report to all parties or may choose to send a copy of the letter/report to one of the parties and require that it be photocopied and mailed to all other parties.

The written comments submitted to the court should not advance a particular position or plan for the child but should instead focus on the status ot the child(ren) in care. A letter or report may address the following:

(a) general observations about the behavior of the child(ren) while in a foster parent’s, pre-adoptive parent’s or relative caregiver’s home and the relationship of the child(ren) with any members of the family;
(b) visits and/or connections between the biological parents and the child(ren) as well as any visits and connections with siblings;
(c) any educational, social, medical and/or mental health considerations concerning the child(ren) or any special problems experienced by the child(ren); and/or
(d) any other information that in a foster parent’s, pre-adoptive parent’s or relative caregiver’s opinion affects the health, safety or well-being of the

[gregorysparents]

Thanks for the info. Unfortunately, we don't have fourteen days to wait - our court hearing is this coming Monday.

However, we do have "legal standing" in this case so we hope that helps us.

I am going to "hand deliver" this letter to: the court house, to CASA, to Gregory's cw, to the attorney for the DFC and then finally to the birth parents attorney.

We know that the move to the birth parents home is NOT in Gregory's best interest. So.....
PLEASE pray that this letter might help the Judge decide to keep Gregory in our home just a little longer while everyone works on reunification.

Thanks again to everyone that gave me some much needed help and advice.

Christina

[numbr1dbcksfan]

Curiously.. I wonder if they have walked the straight and narrow for so long (2003 and 2004 respectively you stated)... why should they not get their child back?

Is there more to it? (You dont have to answer, just curious...)

[TBearsAunt]

Response to numbr1dbcksfan:

Even on the off chance that Gregory's bp have truly and completely changed, I feel that in cases like this we have to look at things from the point of view of a three year old child who for the last two years has looked at two people as his mother and father. Allowing Gregory to remain with a couple who has loved him and cared for him and want to continue loving and caring for him would not be done simply to "punish" his birth parents and "reward" his foster parents, but because that would be what is best for him.

It is high time for courts to look at things from a child's point of view, not just biology.

[gregorysparents]

QUOTE=numbr1dbcksfan]Curiously.. I wonder if they have walked the straight and narrow for so long (2003 and 2004 respectively you stated)... why should they not get their child back?

Hi. I have no problem answering your question. The history of these parents "walking the straight and narrow" is long. They take the right path - then they take the wrong path - and they keep repeating this cycle.

Below are some facts of the case (taken from a CASA report that was filed with the court in February of this year):

I will be using BJ and Sr. in place of the birth parents full name. M is for Gregory's half sister.

q “October 2001 – police found drugs in the home of BJ and Sr. At the same time the house was determined to be an endangerment to the children welfare. Mrs. BJ placed her two daughters in the care of their paternal grandparents through a guardianship in the county circuit court.

q October 2002 – DFC started receiving reports alleging that BJ had “flipped out” and was hallucinating and had jumped out of her vehicle when it was moving. Both “M” and Gregory were present when this occurred. BJ was admitted to the ***** Center at this time and admitted that she uses coke, crack, and beer and that her problem is chronic. DFC substantiated neglect.

q November 16, 2002 – it was reports that BJ was smoking crack cocaine in the house with Gregory present.

q January 27, 2003 – DFC received a report again that BJ was using drugs in front of “M” and that Sr. was beating BJ in front of “M”. At this time there was also suspicion that Sr. was manufacturing illegal substance in his backyard.

q April 4, 2003 – Indiana State Police arrested both Sr. and BJ at their home for operating a meth lab. The children (“M” and Gregory) were present. The children were removed and placed with the paternal grandparents until a more permanent placement could be made.

q April 7, 2003 - Gregory was placed into foster care, where he remains. His sister, “M”, was placed with her biological father where she also remains.”

The above dates and info. are strictly FACTS of the case – it’s not my thoughts and/or opinions.

Furthermore, the birth parents (Sr. age 54 and BJ will be 42 in September) are married to each other (have been I think since 1997) and have three biological children together (two girls (ages 8 and almost 7) and then Gregory). Sr. also has another child – a 33-year old daughter (that he has had nothing to do with). BJ has four other children (three boys (ages 23, 19 and 15) and an 11-year old daughter. The two oldest boys are in prison – not jail – but prison. The 15-year old and the 11-year old are with their father’s (two separate ones). That’s right – Gregory is the birth dad’s fourth child and the birth mom’s seventh child. When Gregory was removed in April of 2003, there was only one other child living in the home – “M” whom was 8-years old at the time.

They started serving their jail time, for their April 2003 Class D felony, September 2003 to their release June 2004.

The birth parents have a long history of problems dealing with drugs, alcohol, relationship problems and etc. Sr. was arrested two weeks before his sentencing hearing in September 2003 for another Class D felony of theft. In November 2004, he received a judgment of “conviction/suspension – guilty plea”. Basically, this means that he pled guilty and received probation for 18-months. Now, keep in mind that he and BJ were arrested in April 2003 for Class B and Class D felonies relating to meth (the Class B was dropped because we were told that they “narked” on others). They started serving their jail time in September 2003. They served 9-months of an 18-month sentence. They were released in June 2004.

Scott and I truly feel like Sr. and BJ have not made any permanent, long-term positive changes in their lives. While we are TRULY thankful that they have remained drug-free for the past year (they are drug tested on a random basis) we are concerned that this is not a permanent situation. They have a long history of getting “clean” and then going back, getting “clean” and then going back and etc. Each and every time, they find God. They have found God again, but by their actions, words, and etc. we truly feel like this is not a permanent situation. BJ treats me with NO respect and NO kindness. I have truly gone out of my way to be kind and respectful to her.

To add to this, Gregory was sick about two weeks ago. I called the birth parents several times that week. I talked with BJ and told her what was going on with Gregory. I called and talked with her several times. I invited her to call and check on him. She did call once or twice. Furthermore, we invited them to come and see Gregory during this time he was sick - they did not accept our invitation. We invited them and Gregory's sisters to our home on Christmas Eve day. We found out it out case plan meeting this week, that they will not be coming. They said "they might" come sometime after the first of the year.

You see, we did not have to offer or to do any of the above - but - we choose to do these things to help THEM and GREGORY work on their relationship and so the parents would understand that we will do whatever it takes to make this move easier on Gregory.

Any and all recommnedations that have been given to the courts have stated, "DON'T RETURN HIM TO HIS BIRTH PARENTS."
The following persons have said the above: two psychologists that have seen Gregory a couple of times each and then have also seen Gregory with his birth parents a time or two; a psychologist that the DFC hired (she never saw any of the parties - but looked over all of the case); the DFC and CASA.

Hope this answers your questions. Please let me know what you think.

Christina

[spitzlvr]

Good luck in court today. Please tell us how it goes. I will be thinking good thoughts for you (and that the judge does the right thing) all day

[gregorysparents]

numbr1dbcksfan - I was wondering what your response was to my answers to your questions. I know that people a lot of times only tell their side of a story - hopefully the info. that I gave you - showed you the total picture. I am glad that you asked those questions - I am sure that others had the same questions but didn't want to ask.

TBearsAunt - thanks for your support. Your words were almost the same as any and all recommendations that have been presented to the court.

spitzlvr - thanks for your kind words.

Gryph and Kelly - thanks for the info. I am taking this letter to court this morning. I called the court house on Friday and was told to bring the letter sometime before our hearing. I will be making copies for everyone involved.

Lori - words can't express my thanks for all of your help. Without you - my letter still wouldn't be completed!!!

Thanks again to EVERYONE. Without all of your questions, comments and input - I would not have been able to complete my letter.

Well, today is the day. Wish us luck!!!!

Christina

[leastofthese]

Godspeed, Christina. My prayers are with you today. Anxious to hear an update when you're ready to talk about it all.